There is no Grey
by Zombie Eats Donuts
Summary: What if Rey hadn't mind tricked her way out after the interrogation? Seriously, how would she even know that trick. Rated M for future chapters. The beautiful artwork of the cover image is by Little Chmura, and can be found on tumblr.
1. Chapter 1

**Rey**

Rey awoke with a start, confused. The last she remembered was struggling to move in the forest. A creature that terrified her, that caused pain to swell in her head. She could feel the invasion into her mind, seeking answers, looking for BB8, the map. She wanted to run from the pain, the fear. It felt as her eyes were being pushed from the sockets, her body screaming at her to flee but he muscles in pain when it refused to do what she wanted.

She had heard the storm troopers calling to this man, this beast, but she couldn't understand what they were saying. The creature had stopped searching her mind, but the pain was still there. It was hard for her to think of anything but the pain that ripped through her head and body. The fear that was pulsing through her veins. Then there was nothing.

She felt the bindings on her wrists and forearms keeping her in place. The jolt that had awakened her made her aware or the dull pain that was still behind her eyes from the earlier altercation. She scanned the room. It was fairly well lit considering the black panels everywhere. The air was sterile and she could smell the metal of the ship. He eyes then stopped at a corner of the room. It was darker there and the beast looked as if he were a decoration. He was sitting on his heels watching her, how long had he been there? How long had she been out?

If she had learned anything on Jakku it was to not show fear. "Where am I?" she asked hoping she sounded braver than she felt.

The beast didn't move. "You are my guest."

The fact that he called her his guest seemed to get under her skin, she wanted him to keep talking though, hoping she could find out about her friends. "Where are the others?"

"You mean the murderers, traitors and thieves you call friends? You'll be relieved to hear I have no idea."

She thought about what he just said. Why did he tell her this? Wouldn't he have so much more advantage thinking that he had Finn, Han and Chewie? She studied the beast with a bit more curiosity. What monstrosity was behind the mask? Why would this thing hide behind a mask?

"You still want to kill me." He said.

She noticed it wasn't a question he asked, but more of a statement. She thought of his words earlier of her being his guest, she felt more as if she were prey caught in the corner by a beast. "That happens when you're being hunted by a creature in a mask."

She watched as he rose from his crouching position his hands unlatching his mask, and pulling it off his helmet, placing it in a pile of ashes. She was caught off guard. There was no monstrosity behind it at all. His dark locks fell around his long face. If she were to see him at the outpost she would almost call him handsome, until she looked into his eyes. The dark eyes that seemed haunted. Her breath caught in her throat and she had to look away.

"Tell me about the droid."

She again was taken aback by his voice. Without the helmet his voice was pleasing, a sound of velvet that unnerved her.

"He's a BB unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator..."

"He's carrying a section of a navigational chart. We have the rest, recovered from the archives of the Empire. We need the last piece, and somehow, you convinced the droid to show it to you. You. A scavenger."

She is again afraid and hurt. How does he know that? Why is she hurt she wonders? His words are nothing, should be nothing to her. Though she knows, she felt so alone. At least on Jakku she could fight back, she could run if needed. She doesn't look at him, she stares straight ahead trying to not let his words hurt her, trying to keep her emotions in check so he doesn't realize he had gotten to her. Though tears are springing up in her eyes she is hoping that he doesn't notice, or hopes that he doesn't realize that it was his words that did it, that made her feel so alone all over again.

She feels him so close to her, feels the heat from his breath on her neck. "You know I can take whatever I want."

She feels like her heart drop not knowing what he meant. Not knowing if he were going to do what he had done in the forest or worse. He hasn't touched her so far, and she was hoping that with his disdain of her being a scavenger from Jakku he wouldn't now.

He brings his hand to the side of her face, it felt like a static electricity from his hands to her skin, it didn't hurt, it wasn't unpleasant at all, more of a tickle. She could feel him seeping back into her head. This time it wasn't as bad as the last, the pain didn't hit her like a transport ship screaming in her head. She tries to resist his gentle probing. Trying to hide inside her own head.

"You are so lonely, so afraid to leave."

She can't hold back the tears now, they stream down her face. Partially due to the strain she is having trying to get him out of his head, but mainly because she is always alone. She had thought with her meeting of her new friends she wouldn't feel that way anymore. She felt him go deeper into the recesses of her mind.

"At night, desperate to sleep, you imagine an ocean, I see it. I see the island."

She tries to break free but the restraints keep her tightly in place. Tears still streaming down her cheeks, meeting under her chin. These are her thoughts, her private dreams, the places she goes when she wants to get away from Jakku without having to leave. When she was lonely, so alone in the harsh deserts that made her so hard. She needed to stop thinking about her feelings on loneliness. She thought of Han and how he offered her work. How she looked up to the man whom she had just met, that offered her a place, a purpose other than just surviving.

"And Han Solo, you feel like he's the father you never had…. He would have disappointed you."

She turned her head from him, she didn't want to show the pain he was bringing to her, though she knew it was futile. He could see everything, invading her privacy. She had to try to make it stop. She had to not think about what he wants. Couldn't make it easy for him. She started to resist, to try to hide her mind from him. Oh stars it hurt fighting back. The pain from earlier was returning as she resisted. She wants the pain to stop, "Get out of my head!"

He leans closer, the electric tickle intensified, the warm breath on her neck felt more like fire now. She was still fighting the battle that was going on in her head.

"I know you've seen the map, it's in there, and now you'll give it to me!"

She is still trying to fight him, to resist him. The static and heat leave as he moves in front of her, his hand outstretched.

"Don't be afraid, I feel it to."

She regains her senses when he wasn't so close, she feels stronger and fights, she can feel the barrier in her head which he is trying to knock down mentally. "I'm not giving you anything!" She feels stronger, she leans towards him staring into his dark haunting eyes.

"We'll see."

She can feel him trying harder to break her, yet she still resists. She doesn't know how but she notices that he is shaking now. She can feel him, she can hear a whisper in the room, it's him, but she knows he isn't saying anything. She can see the confusion in his eyes, and something else. The air around them is electrified, she believes she sees a glow around them both, it distracts her, but as soon as she sees it, it's gone. She realizes its fear she sees in his brown eyes. "You… you're afraid." Then she hears a name ~ _Darth Vader_ ~ "that you'll never be as strong as Darth Vader!"

She feels him retreating from her head and sees a panic spread over his face. She falls back to the hard table once the connection of their minds are lost, though she keeps watching him. The relief of her thoughts being her own washes over her. Adrenaline flowing through her body as she is breathing hard from the battle that raged between them. Her eyes never leaving his, and she continued to watch as he grabbed his helmet from the ash and walked briskly past her.

Rey was alone in the room, still strapped to the table. The adrenaline had died down from the encounter with the creature. She didn't want to think of him as anything else. She didn't want to think of his eyes that made her think of rich soil, or his handsome features. It was easier to think of him as a monster, a murder and not the man she saw behind the mask. Her eyes were heavy, she couldn't remember the last time she had slept. The past days were all a blur, from her saving the little BB unit, to meeting Fin and going on the run with him. They had become fugitives of the First Order, and now they had her. She was hoping that Han, Finn, and the BB unit were able to find the Resistance. Their mission was so much more than anything she could do. She was a lowly scavenger. A nothing. She had even stopped wondering how to escape. How could prey escape a monster in a mask?

Her eyes were closing, she couldn't keep them open between everything that had happened, and the tears that burned her eyes from self-pity. The hum in the room lulled her to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Rey**

She wasn't aware of how long she slept. She could feel the metal table that she was still strapped to. Her body was screaming at her, her muscles were tight and her head throbbed. She scanned the room thinking that she would find him again staring at her but there was nobody there. She should have felt relieved that he wasn't there, that she wouldn't have to deal with more of the mind torture that he had dealt to her earlier, but she wasn't. It made her feel lonely and unimportant.

"Stop it Rey!" she whispered to herself. "You've always been alone." Her thoughts though were betraying her strength. Yes, she had always been alone for as long as she could remember, but never was she alone and helpless as she was now. On Jakku she would have to only worry about herself, and now she was worried about her new found friends. Where they were? Did they get away from him? She thought back when he told her that he didn't know where they were but could he be telling her the truth. He was the enemy, and she never really had a true enemy so she wasn't sure of intentions, or why someone would lie about not knowing where something of importance was.

Her thoughts were stopped by the sound of footsteps coming closer, she stopped breathing, and closed her eyes. She didn't want to see him, didn't want to see those eyes. She thought she could act as if she were sleeping and maybe he would leave. The sound of boots were getting closer, she started to breath, to control it so it would appear she was asleep. She was hoping it was anyone but the monster walking toward the table.

The steps stopped beside her. She knew who it was, she could feel the same electric tingle from earlier. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess. Just act like you are resting, maybe he will go away. Who are you kidding Rey, he doesn't care if you are sleeping, he is the enemy, a monster. He has come back to keep probing your mind, to find the map. Oh Stars! What if he is sifting through my thoughts right now!

She quiets her mind but she doesn't feel anything in her head, no pressure behind her eyes. All she can feel is the electric tickle that he seems to emit. What is that she wonders?

She believes that she hears a small sigh, and hears his boots as he walks away.

 **Kylo Ren**

He was going through all that just happened with his Master. He felt shame that his master saw through his weaknesses, that he could see his fight with the light. He was told he would bring the girl to him. He didn't want to, she was strong with the force. She was brave, she was intriguing. He wanted to train her, wanted to teach her the ways of the force. He wanted her to call him Master as he remembered the energy of the force that sparked between them, the smell of her. It was earthy and natural. The freckles on her face and shoulders from days under the hot desert sun.

His steps slowed for a moment wondering where that had come from.

He now had to deliver the girl to Snoke, and he wasn't sure what the Supreme Leader would do with her. Would he keep her as a pet? Turn her to the dark side with mind games and punishment as he did with him? Or even kill her on sight? The last though was the hardest to think of.

Ignore it, she is nothing! He said to himself. She is nothing but a scavenger who is a resistance sympathizer. As soon as the First Order retrieves the map they should execute her for the trash she is.

If he was ever going to prove himself to his Master he would need to get the thoughts of this girl from his mind, kill her and be done with it.

He entered the room, she was still restrained on the table. She was feigning sleep. He could feel her trepidation. Does she know it's him? He would know if she had walked in on him, he could feel the air spark and pop with the force. He stood beside her and watched her chest lifting as she would breathe. He could reach into her mind right now and find the map if he was quick enough. Find it then snap her neck. He thought about her throat beneath his fingers. His fingers around her neck, the feeling of her soft skin. Watching as she is struggling for breath, his large hands tighter and tighter, lifting her off the ground. Her feet struggling to touch the floor, her small fingers trying to pry his hands from her throat. Her fighting to fill her lungs with air.

It was a fleeting thought, but it made him grin.

He stood there watching her, she confused him. He wanted to teach her, he wanted to kill her, he wanted to fuck her, not in that order. He felt the tug of it again, the tug of compassion that held him back from being everything he should be. Kept him from being as powerful as his grandfather. He needed to meditate and ask for guidance from Darth Vader.

He sighed and walked away from his weakness.

Back in his chambers he knelt in front of his shrine made for his grandfather. The mask that so many respected and feared. He wanted to feel that same way.

"Grandfather, you showed me once and I again need your guidance. I need to find a way to extinguish this pain. This light. I need it gone to fulfill your legacy."

He sat trying to meditate but he couldn't clear his mind. His thoughts kept going back to the scavenger that resisted him. He would need to prepare to take her to Snoke. He needed to keep his thoughts away from what his Master will do to the girl.

He quickly stands and moves towards the door, his cape billowing behind him. He goes to find the nearest storm trooper to collect the prisoner.

"You!" he says as he sees a trooper rounding the corner.

Kylo smiled to himself when he saw that the trooper stumbled. The troopers were afraid of him and he enjoyed it. There were so many that were afraid of him, which he fed on.

He quickened his pace to the trooper until they met in the middle.

"There is a prisoner in interrogation room 2, collect a few more troopers and have her transported to my command shuttle."

"Yes Lord Ren." The trooper answered and turned to go towards interrogation rooms.

This is my first Star Wars Fanfic. I was never big into Star Wars until TFA. Since that came out I've had to watch them all... in chronological order (even the cartoons and animated films.) I'm not all up to speed with the terminology so please forgive me. I am hopeful there will be a Reylo love affair in the future, but if not I'll just make my own.


	3. Chapter 3

**Rey**

Her fingers were starting to tingle from the restraints. She felt as if she had been in that room tied to that table for hours, she heard more footsteps coming towards her. She didn't feel anything with them, maybe a little fear, but there was no difference in the air. She had that at least going for her. These steps didn't belong to the monster that put her here.

Suddenly 3 storm troopers appeared in front of her. One unlatched her restraints, the other two had blasters pointed at her.

He legs weren't working properly, they had gone to sleep from the lack of blood flow and she fell to her knees trying to get off the table. What felt like daggers shot through her legs and she grunted in pain, her eyes watered. One of the troopers used her position to try and put restrains on her wrists. She struggled with him, her feet were trying to push herself away from them. She tried to stand but then felt a hard blow to the back of her head by the butt of a blaster.

"Stay down prisoner!"

Blinding pain shot through her head. She swore she saw stars in front of her eyes. One of the troopers stepped on her back to keep her down as another put the restrains around her wrists. Her face pressed against the floor, the cold seemed to make a bit of the pain in her head fade. Until they jerked her up to her feet. She almost fell back down to her knees from the pain. She couldn't keep her feet under her, her sight was in and out, she couldn't get her bearings straight. Then she felt her feet being dragged behind her as they were taking her to where ever they were taking her.

She didn't care anymore where taking her, if they were going to put her out of her misery she could finally be free. Free of the fear and pain. She then then thought of Fin, he was afraid of the First Order and now she understood why. Why he wished to flee with the first transporter to the outer rim he could find. She now wished she had gone with him.

They dragged her down hallway after hallway. Long stretch, turn left, then right. Wait for the lift, we are going up. Her legs still not in her full control, though she is trying to stand. Another hallway, her head is hanging watching the lights that are shining on the glossed floors. Everything is so clean not like Jakku. She could start hearing more movement from others around her and noticed that the gleaming floor was now metal grate.

They were still dragging her since she couldn't get her footing right, her feet were now falling behind worse since they were going down metal stairs. She heard the trooper behind her say something but she couldn't make it out. She knew he was talking to her but it sounded like static in her ears, fuzzy and incoherent.

All of a sudden she felt a hand on her back and felt it shove, hard. The other two troopers just let go and she fell down the remaining of the stairs. Instincts kicked in and she tried to stop her fall but her hands restrained she couldn't do anything to stop it. Her collar hit the last step and her head hit the crate that was waiting to be loaded.

She felt thick liquid dripping down the side of her face and knew she was bleeding, she wiggled her body so she wasn't on her side. She rested her back to the cool wall, her palms resting behind her back feeling the cold floor on her palms. Her head felt like it had been stomped by an AT-AT. She was having a hard time breathing, the air was getting thicker, and it felt like she was trying to breathe through water. She felt the electricity on her skin and knew that he was close. She still couldn't see anything but shapes, her eyes strained to find the monster. She then heard a screams, one male, one female, and saw a blur of white being thrown across the large hanger. Another scream, and then it sounded as if someone were choking, she saw the storm trooper hovered in the air, reaching for his neck. She came to the realization that he was choking but there were no hands around his neck. All of a sudden she heard a snap and the storm trooper went limp and fell from the air beside her.

She was trembling in fear, her eyes wouldn't leave the troopers body beside her. He was dead, just like that. Rey wanted to scream… to cry… to vanish from this horrible nightmare. Her breath was hitching in her throat, she couldn't breathe, her chest was tightening. A gloved hand was at her face, stroking her cheek. She looked up and saw the creature in the mask. Before fear could grip her, before she could even think she slipped into a welcoming black void where there was no pain, no fear, no more death.

 **Kylo Ren**

He was barely listening to General Hux in the hanger, a dull pain in the back of his head. Most likely caused by Hux and his non-stop chattering. He was bored, it was always the same thing with the General. Though he did remember the shock when Hux had suggested to Supreme Leader that they use their newest weapon to destroy Hosnian Prime, the Center of Government. General Hux was speaking to him about possible resistance bases, the best way to capture the high ranking officers. Only half listening he let him talk. He knew how much Hux loved the sound of his own voice. He had seen inside of the man's head, the want of power, the loathing he felt about Supreme Leaders apprentice. He was more nervous of his upcoming visit with Supreme Leader than caring what Hux had to say.

"Ren? Are you even listening to me?" Hux asked annoyance dripping from his voice. Kylo shifted his gaze to the General, but didn't say anything. He didn't need to, He was the Master of The Knights of Ren, he only answered to one person, and that was his Master.

He felt her before he even saw her. He vaguely noticed when Hux stormed off like a child who didn't get what he wanted mumbling something about the foolishness of the force. Normally he wouldn't let that disrespect go, verbally sparing the General was one of his favorite past times but he was nervous. He didn't know what was going to happen when he brought the girl to Supreme Leader.

He noticed that she was being carried into the hanger by two troopers, her feet dragging behind her. Her head was hanging down. Had they knocked her out? Drugged her? Then closer she came he felt pain in the back of his head increased. He knew she was conscious and in pain. The force that surrounded her was disheveled and weak. Rage was bubbling within him. He knew he needed to gain control, if he didn't he would destroy everything in the hanger with his saber. He had done it many times, couldn't control the anger when he had failed. Much of the Finalizer had to be replaced on a normal bases at his hands.

He stood in front of his ship waiting for them to arrive with the scavenger. Relieved he hid his face behind a mask or they would see the fury build in his eyes on how she had been treated. Suddenly he saw the trooper behind her shove her down the stairs. She couldn't catch herself and her head hit the corner of a crate. Before he could control himself the two that were dragging her flew into the air hitting a tie fighter across the hanger. He heard their screams, their fear, it wasn't enough, more punishment needed to be given.

Not moving from his ship he raised his hand towards the trooper that had shoved the girl, using the force was he strangling him. Kylo enjoyed knowing that the life was slipping away. He lifted the trooper off the ground, he tightened his grip with the force and felt a snap through it. Satisfied he let go of the lifeless body.

Quickly he made his way to the scavenger, she was bleeding. He could feel her pain, he could feel her screaming inside her head. He noticed that she was having trouble catching her breath. He could feel the electricity again as he touched her cheek. He was gentle with her, she had been through enough already as it seemed. He could feel her fear again and he waved his hand causing her to fall into a deep slumber.

He put his arms under her shoulders and her knees and lifted her to take her to his command shuttle. She was so light in his arms he noticed, he felt the faint pulse of her light. It cooled his anger, it made him want to protect her. She was so petite, a desert flower, shining like a kyber crystal in the darkness.

There was no work going on in the Hanger he noticed. Everyone had stopped to watch the most frightening man in the galaxy carry the resistance scum like he would be carrying a lover over the threshold.

Kylo stopped before boarding his shuttle, he knew they were watching him, he knew they were curious even without sweeping their thoughts. He didn't like it, he didn't want them to think him weak. He turned his head towards the silenced crowd. They all started to get back to work, quickly. They didn't wish to be like the two unlikely troopers who flew across the hanger, or even worse the one that was splayed on the floor dead.


	4. Chapter 4

**Kylo Ren**

He put in the coordinates to where the Supreme Leader was hiding at the time. He never did stay in one place to long. It was war, and the resistance would use the same strategies. They weren't much different he thought, other than the fact that The Republic just wished to keep things as they were. The rich stay rich and the poor and enslaved know their place. The First Order wanted peace, but there were too many voices on the Senate. How could anything be for the better with so many opinions? No it would be better with just the First Order, there would still be voices, but there wouldn't be so many that they would drown everything of importance out. Facts would be found, and the best plan for all would be put in place. The best for everyone, rich, poor, and those who would be freed from slavery.

Looking over he watched as the girl slept. His emotions mixed with what could happen once they reached their destination. He was hoping that his Master would give her to him to do what he wanted.

He also wanted to know where she had come from. She being nothing but a scavenger, but so strong with the force. Who were her parents? They must have been force sensitive, they should have known that their child would be to. When he was in her mind he say that she had been alone since childhood. Did they die? There were so many answered questions about her and he wanted answers.

The questions didn't stop going through his mind.

He was growing ever more nervous the closer and closer they got to Moraband. He thought of his Master and the things he might do to her. She was still sleeping and again he thought of looking inside of her mind, hoping that he could get the lost piece of the map.

As quickly he thought it he dismissed it. That piece to the last Jedi could be the only thing that could keep her alive. She was more vital with it than without. Maybe he would be able to make his master see reason. That she could be important to them. He would plea her case, offer to teach her the ways of the dark side. To make her a Knight of Ren.

He imagined how powerful she could become using the dark force. How powerful they could be together. He would teach her how to tap into her anger, to will the force with it, and how much greater it was than being a Jedi. He knew that she had enough to be angry about. He would be able to tap into her loneliness, the pain of never having anyone, of having to just survive. He would make her see that he could be the one that she could depend on. The one that could give her anything she desired, that she would never want again. The dreams that she had, he could give.

His mind was set, this is what would happen, what he would make happen. Supreme Leader would see that he was right. He would train her and no longer fail his Master. She could be the one that could help rid him of the light. If she were like him, he wouldn't need the pull to the light, he could forget who he used to be, and become what he was to truly become. To be as great as Darth Vader, to continue his legacy. With her he would claim his true birthright.

They were almost to their destination and he needed to prepare her to meet the Supreme Leader. He gently lifted her taking her to the table toward the back of the ship, he didn't wish to wake her. He wasn't ready for a fight, though he knew that it wouldn't be much of one with what she had already gone through. He turned her over and released the restraints behind her back, the static between them tingling his hands as he did so, then replaced them with the straps built on the table.

With her laid her on the table he studied the wound on the side of her head. Dry blood caked the gash and soiled her face. He realized he should have tended it much sooner. He collected his medpac and found the bacta gel. Knowing that he wouldn't be able to really clean the wound until he removed her hair from the buns. He didn't like her hair up, it was too severe.

His fingers started to mess with the pins and bands that held her hair up, struggling. He realized he would have to take his gloves off to actually achieve his goal. Once his gloves were off he was able to unwrap the leather ties and remove the pins. He ran his fingers through her hair, it was cool and soft. He was lost in the motions of brushing her hair, it soothed his nerves. He didn't even realize that she was awake, and watching him.

 **Rey**

Rey woke up feeling hands running through her hair. She didn't move because she didn't want it to stop. She didn't know the comfort such a simple action could bring. She opened her eyes and noticed the creature was the one doing it. She should have known, once she awake she could feel the tickle he caused every time he was near her. Her body was still in pain, her head felt as it has split in two, there was a burning in her collar. She didn't even want to move knowing that it would intensify the aches. She would just lay there and enjoy the tickle, enjoy feeling someone else's fingers running through her hair other than own. She had no energy to do anything else anyway.

Suddenly it stopped and she knew he was staring at her seeing that she had woke up. She thought of the haunted brown eyes behind the mask. The way they could see into her mind, see into her soul. She was relieved that she couldn't see his face.

"I have to clean and care for your wound. We will be at our destination before long" He said his face moving closer to hers holding hair out of the way of the gash.

His voice mechanical again, she preferred it that way. With him so close at least she couldn't feel his breath. Would it still feel like fire as it did earlier? If she hadn't seen his face she would have sworn the beast behind the mask was an Arkanian dragon his breath made her skin so hot.

"Where are we? Where are we going?" She asked. She didn't really care anymore, in the back recesses of her mind she even hoped that he were taking her to some uninhabited planet to leave her there, or put her out of her misery. She felt his fingers working on the gash on her head. She felt something cool being put on it and it felt nice.

"We are on our way for you to meet Supreme Leader."

Fear suddenly griped her again, she started to jerk against the restraints, bucking her body against the table. Adrenaline surged through her body and she barely felt the pain as she strained her muscles to get off the table.

"Let me go!" She screamed. "I refuse!" Her eyes closed, thrashing her head side to side. The metal table she was laying on was moving from her escape attempts. Suddenly there was a weight on top of her hindering her movement. The shock of him on top of her, straddling her made her stop with a quickness. She hadn't even noticed him climb on the table.

She stared at her reflection in the visor of his mask and she didn't even recognize herself. She looked wild, her hair was spread out around her, pieces of it sticking to her face. Her eyes wide. She noticed that there was blood dried down her face. Her chest heaving. She didn't know who was staring back at her through her reflection. It wasn't Rey. Rey who lived her life surviving, she would go hungry some nights but she always survived.


	5. Chapter 5

**Kylo Ren**

He watched as the girl started to struggle. He saw the fear in her eyes. She started to thrash against her restraints yelling that she wouldn't go. His gloves that were laying on the table lifted and darted past his face. The Medpac was soon behind it which he had to dodge. She was using the force, if he didn't stop her who knows what she would do, what she could do. He knew what could happen with an uncontrolled force sensitive, especially one that was so powerful.

He climbed on the table with cat like agility, his knees on opposite sides of her, his hands flat on each side of her face. He did the only thing that he could think of without injuring her. He sat on her. He didn't put much pressure on her, just enough that she would know he was there. She suddenly went still, and stared at him. Her brow furrowed, she looked confused. She didn't say anything, just stared at him. He could feel the electricity, more than ever radiating from her. He could see the force surrounding her, the aura around her was a yellow tint. He could see his dark red aura mingling, swirling with hers. Where it was combining was a dark orange. He had never seen anything like it. Never seen anything like her.

He needed her to be the girl that shot at him on Takodana, the one that fought back so hard during her interrogation. He knew if she were ever going to live through this meeting she would have to prove she could control herself.

"Are you finished Scavenger?"

He disliked calling her that, but he had no other name for her. All the time he was in her head searching he didn't even learn her name. There were no memories that he found of anyone in her life actually calling her by a name.

She nodded her head indicating she was in fact done, her eyes never leaving what would be his eyes if he weren't wearing his helmet.

Satisfied he sat up, and gracefully removed himself from on top of her and from the table. He looked around for his gloves and the medpac. The ship wasn't that large, they didn't go too far from the table. Moving back beside her he looked in the pac when he found the injector he knew she would need. Pulling it out he saw her eyes grow larger.

"What is that?" She asked, her voice weak.

"It's a pain killer. It will help." He said as he put the injector to her arm and pulled the trigger. He heard her suck her breath in through her teeth. He couldn't help but smile, all the pain she had been though, all that she had suffered all in less than 8 standard hours, and she is bracing for a simple shot.

"We don't have much time before we will have to land. I need you to be able to walk."

She just nodded, her eyes never leaving his face.

He hadn't even thought of anything being broken. He inspected her body, her legs, and ankles but didn't see swelling. Going back to the locker that held the medpac he grabbed the scanner. He didn't want to miss anything.

He started at her feet, they were so small. Then to her slim ankles, farther to her legs. They were strong, strong and nice. Then he moved the scanner farther to her thighs. He noticed they were muscular. He was enjoying this more than he should, and he knew it. Next was her hips, from there he moved to her small waist and a flat stomach, there wasn't an ounce of fat on the girl. But he knew that some nights she would have to go hungry, then go out into the harsh desert looking for anything that could get her a meal. Her ribs were next moving to her breasts. He lingered there a bit longer than the rest of her. They were bound with a wrap, he couldn't tell their size only that they weren't very large, he wondered how they would feel in his hands. Would she enjoy him touching her so intimately? Ashamed by his thoughts he kept moving, checking her right hand, it was so small compared to his. He wondered if they were calloused from her hard life. Up her right arm, he noticed freckles on her golden skin. The short fine hairs on her arms raised towards his hand as he was making sure there were nothing wrong. He moved to the left arm, he was grateful that the scanner hadn't found anything. He still didn't know what the troopers had done to her before the hanger.

Thinking of the troopers and the treatment of her. It started to make his blood boil. Rage bubbling from inside him, he wanted to hurt them all over again. He was hoping the two that were thrown across the hanger were suffering in pain, that they were permanently damaged.

A beep from the scanner brought him back to the girl. He was scanning her collar bone when the machine went off. He read the data and laid the scanner on the table beside her. It was fractured. He moved her tunic gently away from the injury and noticed dark bruising surrounding it.

"You've fractured your collarbone. There is nothing that can be done, only time can mend it."

He looked at her face and noticed that her eyes were squeezed shut and tears were escaping the corners of her eyes.

* * *

 **Rey**

She was grateful when he left her side going over to the wall locker. She didn't like what she saw in the reflection. She didn't receive much of a reprieve, he was back a few seconds later, then she felt it. The electricity at her feet. Without his gloves as a barrier it was a bit stronger than a tickle, but not painful. Right foot first, then the left. The electricity moved up her right leg first, then her left. She closed her eyes not knowing what he was doing to her, not knowing what he was planning. She remembered how late at night she would see men at the outpost touching women, and they enjoyed it. She knew what went on between the two sexes. She wanted nothing to do with it, especially with a monster. She was trying to stop her eyes from watering, she felt his presence move up her legs, her thighs. A tear escaped her clenched eye. Electricity moved over her stomach, it flipped and fluttered, she thought she might get sick. More tears found their way out of the corners on her eyes. Electricity moved to her breasts, it lingered there longer than anywhere else on her body. Her lips started to tremble, and she bit her lower lip to try to make them still. She then felt the electricity on her hands and up her arms, right… then left. She remembered back on Jakku when late one night a man had gone into her AT-AT, his hands all over her body, she scratched at his face and kicked him away. Scrambling away and running before he could do more. She couldn't do that here. She was still the beast's prey that couldn't fight back. Trapped in a corner, in her case strapped to a table.

She heard a beep, but refused to open her eyes. She felt his fingers moving her tunic. Oh stars, please don't let him rape me. She couldn't get the thought of this monster doing what he wanted to her. She remembered during the interrogation he said it himself. That he could take what he wanted. She was afraid he was going to make good on his promise.

"You've fractured your collarbone. There is nothing that can be done, only time can mend it." She heard the cold mechanical voice say.

Will this ever end? The humiliation, the pain. She was so tired. Wanted nothing more to be back in Jakku, back to her life, back to waiting for the voice that said they would be back for her. She thought of Finn again, why I didn't just go with him, why couldn't I just listen? He tried to tell me. More tears fell.

"Stop crying Scavenger."

Rey's eyes snapped open, her head turning to look at him. He was standing there putting his gloves back on. "You really are a monster aren't you?" She couldn't believe after all that she had gone through he had the audacity to tell her to stop crying. The self-pity she was wallowing in turned back into hostility.

They were both silent, it made her uncomfortable.

"Do you always wear that ridiculous thing?" She wanted to insult him. She wanted to get under his skin like he did hers. She couldn't believe with just one question she could forget everything he had put her through. She knew he wasn't done either, but she didn't care. She was angry. She was used to being ignored, or called names, and being pushed around, at least until she learned how to defend herself with her staff. With everything she had to go through to survive she learned to ignore, but she couldn't ignore him for some reason and it infuriated her.

* * *

A/N: Thank you for everyone that has followed my story. I appreciate you.

I'm just learning the Star Wars Galaxy, but do try to study to make sure it's as correct as possible, so if anything isn't correct please forgive me. :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Kylo Ren**

There she is he thought. The fighter that was on the Finalizer. He always heard about women and their emotions. All his life and all the women he knew were strong. He didn't know all that many, but when he would think of a woman only one would come to his mind, his mother.

He remembered growing up he would sometimes hear his mother cry in the other room, he always knew it was because of his father. It was always the same, his father would come home for a couple of days, they would fight, and he would leave again for months at a time. Those were the only time he had seen any weakness. When she would speak in front of an audience she demanded attention by her presence, her words were powerful, and people were in in awe when she spoke. She was… is, an energy not to be messed with.

"Do you always wear the ridiculous thing?" He heard her ask. He knew she was talking about his mask.

"Yes."

"Why?"

He heard the curiosity in her voice. He didn't mind, it would be a good thing for the future while he trained her.

"There are many reasons, but the main reason is so my enemies can't read me." His answer was truthful, but he also wore it because his face wasn't at all intimidating. He wanted to be feared, with the mask he was. Not many had seen him without it. He didn't want them to start not taking him seriously. He was nothing but a teenager when the Supreme Leader started to train him. It was his master's idea, telling him that nobody would listen to what they believed to be only a child.

"Well it looks stupid." She said.

Behind the mask he lifted his eyebrow at her remark and smirked. He slightly nodded his head towards her to acknowledge her statement.

She definitely had her courage back. He liked it. Her returned courage gave him a bit more now before their meeting.

"It's time we land." He said turning away towards the cockpit. He listened behind him to make sure she wouldn't start another fit. He was thankful when she didn't.

* * *

 **Rey**

She felt the ship land, it was gentler than she thought it would be, if she didn't know better she would have still thought they were still hovering over the planet. She was almost disappointed. He was a good pilot, his landings were so much better than her own. She could fly, and well, or she wouldn't have gotten away from the tie fighters on Jakku.

He was by her side soon after.

"I'm taking you out of the restraints. I do want to warn you that there is no escape. If you run, you will die. If you fight you will die. If you…"

"I know, I know! I die!" She snapped.

Her eyes went wide at what she had just said, if her hands were free she would have slapped them over her mouth. She wasn't sure where that had come from. She was ready for this to all be over. Though still nervous of the upcoming meeting she was ready to stand up, use her muscles and get those damned restraints off her.

He said nothing, just reached over and released her hands. She sat up and stared to rub her wrists, oh stars it felt good. She would do anything to never have those things on her again. She then felt the pressure off of her ankles, her knees jerked to her chest.

Her eyes darted around the ship looking for an exit. She realized there was no way she could escape now. She had no plan how to, no way to leave the planet. She knew that if she lived through this she would find a way.

She swung her feet off the table and noticed he had put out his hand to help her down.

She looked at his hand, then turned her head up to his hidden face with her brow raised. There was no way she would take it. She didn't want to touch him. He was still a monster, she knew he would still devour her if given the chance. That and she didn't want to feel the electricity or whatever it was when he would get to close.

She went to gently get off the table. She didn't want her legs to give out on her and need his assistance. She put her hands on the table to help her push herself off. As soon as she did pain shot through her collar, shoulder and chest. Before she could stop it she fell to her knees and her eyes started to water. Her hand going to where the pain came from. She tried to control it, to make it stop.

Before she knew it he was kneeling beside her. His arm behind her back, his hand on her shoulder. She felt his chest on her other arm. It was an awkward embrace of sorts. With him so close it was hard to breathe. She closed her eyes and tried to calm herself.

His other hand went under her chin lifting it up so she had to look at him. She wiped the tears from her eyes. The electricity seemed to be calming her, it helped her forget the pain. She figured it was that or that in the first time in her life someone was trying to take care of her. Of course she wasn't too pleased that it was this monster, but it was nice all the same.

She tried to see his eyes through his visor but it was just too dark. She wondered what she would see in his eyes, in his face.

"Your mask is still stupid."

All of a sudden she heard him laugh, she could feel his laughter reverberate from his chest down her arm. It sounded awkward behind the mask, though she wasn't sure if it would have sounded any less odd without it. He didn't seem to be the type of man that laughed often.


	7. Chapter 7

**Kylo Ren**

He wanted to help her get off the table. Her legs dangling from the height of it compared to her, it made him think of how small she was. He held his hand out for her to take. She just stared at it unmoving, then looked at him with skepticism written all over her face. His hand fell to his side.

He saw the disaster that was about to happen before it did. As she tried to lift herself off the table he felt a sharp pain rip through his collar and shoulder. She had fallen to her knees, and before he even thought of what he was doing he put his arm around her to comfort her, sort of a half embrace. She was staring at the floor and he wanted to see her face, he lifted it up so he could see her hazel eyes. He could see the questions in them, he didn't even have to read her mind, everything was written to the galaxy in her eyes.

She wiped her eyes and just stared at him.

"Your mask is still stupid."

Her words sound so much like a child when she said it, a smile crossed his lips and before he knew it he was laughing.

It had been so long since he laughed it was a strange sound to him. He noticed that she was smiling and was taken back. She was pretty when she was defiant, even when she was afraid, but when she smiled she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He could feel the force she emitted as it radiated throughout the ship. It was almost euphoric as it flowed through him. He knew that they needed to go, and hated it, but it never went well to keep his master waiting.

He put his hand under her elbow and helped her up. She had winced with pain at the movement, but at least she didn't fight him and seemed that she could stand on her own.

"We must go." He said as he led her to the ships exit. He pressed the code to open the door and the ramp lowered.

* * *

 **Rey**

The ramp lowered and a blast of hot dry air hit her face. She closed her eyes welcoming it. It felt much like the days on Jakku. Though opening her eyes she noticed it looked nothing like the planet she called home for so long. She saw a large temple in front of her that was red, much of everything was red. The only thing that wasn't red were the shadows of black. It was frightening. She could see why the Leader of the First Order could call this home.

She felt her fear starting to return.

The beast placed his hand on her lower back, she could feel the tingle it brought and made her find her strength. He may be a monster, but he has shown her a bit of compassion and he hadn't killed her… yet.

Her feet started moving when his did, wind and dust slapping her face, stinging it. She had to squint to keep the dust debris from going into her eyes. The temple was surrounded by tall sharp intimidating mountains. Before she even realized they had entered the building. The temperature was at least 10 degrees cooler, and it was dark. The only light came from the door they had just entered and rows of torches that lined the walls.

She was still thinking of ways she could escape. She didn't see any shuttles other than the one they had arrived on. There were plenty of places she could hide, but she didn't even know where she was. She knew nothing about the environment, or the dangers of it. It would be a shame if she were able to get away from this creature who may kill her just to die from her thoughtlessness.

Her thoughts drifted to her upcoming death, that he may be the one that would do it. She looked up at the beast and realized she didn't even know his name. This monster that had terrified her, that had treated her wounds, and even comforted her.

"What's your name?" She asked as they walked through what seemed like an endless corridor. She figured if she were to die she at least wanted to know her murders name.

"As long as you don't fight or flee I have no plans to murder you scavenger."

She stumbled when he said that. She didn't feel him inside her head. She got angry at him for assuming what was going through her mind, although it was what she was thinking.

"I never said you would."

"You didn't have to. You were concentrating on it so intently on your impending doom I didn't even have to look into your mind." He said like she should already know. She couldn't stand how smug he was, it infuriated her. She stomped her foot and quickened her steps to get farther away from him.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

Her thoughts were so loud he could have sworn they were falling out of her mouth. She still thought he was going to kill her. He was hoping that he wouldn't be forced to. He didn't know what would happen.

"What's your name?"

He had heard her thoughts that she didn't want to be murdered by someone that she didn't know her name. He wanted to put her mind at ease. "As long as you don't fight or flee I have no plans to murder you scavenger."

He felt her lose her balance, his hand still on her lower back. He wasn't guiding her as he was earlier, but he didn't want to move it. He was trying to use the force to give her courage, to tamper down her fears.

"I never said you would." Again, she was acting like a child. He knew he would have to break her of that habit somehow if she were to be his apprentice.

He figured the truth wouldn't hurt. After all the lies he had been told during his youth he never did like to lie. "You didn't have to. You were concentrating on it so intently on your impending doom I didn't even have to look into your mind."

She stomped her foot and started to walk faster, she was soon ahead of him. He didn't see any point in catching up or stopping her. If he needed to he would be able to use the force to do it, though he didn't relish the thought of it.

He kept walking behind her before he realized they were at his master's throne room. He stopped and cleared his throat loud enough to get her attention.

It worked, she stopped and turned to look at him. He tilted his head to the door motioning that they had arrived at their destination. She stomped back to him and stood in front of him. She looked up at him, her chin set, fire blazing in her hazel eyes.

He wished that he wasn't wearing his helmet. He wanted to see the colors of her eyes without the hindrance. Her height didn't even reach to his shoulders. If he had wrapped his arms around her and held her, her head would rest perfectly on his chest. He wanted to, he wanted to wrap his arms around her, feel her pressed against his body. To swoop down and kiss those lips that were nothing but a defiant line set across her face, kiss her neck, nibble her earlobe. He wondered what her skin would taste like.

"Are we going to meet with your all powerful, supreme leader or not beast?"

Her words broke his lustful thoughts, made him remember why he was here. Just behind that door would change his future for better or worse.

He closed his eyes, controlling all his senses, calming the force that swirled around him. He needed to be on his guard with this meeting more than ever before. Even when he had to face his master for his continuing failures he knew this was far more important. He needed her and he knew it. He knew what had happened between them. Even before the bond there was a link between them. From the first time he saw her, was close to her, he could feel it. He knew she could as well. He didn't want to lose that. Once he trained her to use the force he knew they would be stronger together than apart.


	8. Chapter 8

**Rey**

She stood there toe to toe with the monster, she knew she was being foolish and even acting like a toddler that couldn't get its way. He just made her so angry and frustrated, enough to forget at times that she was still his prisoner that he could control her if he wanted to, put her back in restraints, anything he wanted to really.

She looked at the large door, it was the only barrier from something so much worse that the monster. What was worse than a monster she thought?

She stepped away from him. He wasn't saying anything. It seemed like he was just waiting for her to calm down before he threw her to the wolves.

"Are you ready?"

His voice was stern, but calm. Of course she didn't know if he were because his covered face.

It was time, there was no way to procrastinate. She took a deep breath and nodded her head that she was as ready as she would ever be.

He pushed open the large door and put his hand on her back to lead her in.

When she walked in she noticed a figure on the throne in the middle of the large room. It was hard to see his features, light filtered behind him from the domed roof, he was just a silhouette hiding in the shadows.

"Come in Child, let me see what my apprentice has brought."

She noticed his hand when he raised it in the light, his fingers almost seemed translucent, his fingernails looked as they belonged more to an animal than a man. His voice was calm and gravely, and he spoke eloquently. He didn't raise his voice, but she could hear it resonate in the chambers.

She noticed the light piercing the skin of his small misshapen ears. She was nervous but also curious. She wasn't expecting his voice to sound like someone she would associate with a grandfather. It was patient, but intimidating.

Her head turned towards the beast when he nudged her back to get her to walk forward. She glared at him, she imagined he was coaxing her to her own death. Though she had already come to the conclusion that if she were going to die today, she won't show fear, she won't beg, and if she had to, she would fight.

She walked a few steps closer and stopped, hoping it would be close enough. She held her hands in front of her and stared straight ahead. She didn't look at the silhouette, but tried to look through him.

She watched as he stood up from his throne. She noticed how tall he was, so much taller than the beast that brought her there. He walked over closer to her. She didn't look up, her hands started to shake, she gripped them tighter hoping that neither noticed.

"You are younger than I would have thought. Finally I get to meet the girl who has given Master of the Knights of Ren so much trouble." She thought she heard amusement in his voice.

She didn't say anything, didn't move. She felt she were on a slave block being examined before a sell.

"How old are you?"

She almost didn't hear him he spoke so quietly. "I'm not sure." She jumped from hearing her own voice, it was so loud within the circular chamber.

He was walking slowly around her, it wasn't helping her nerves. "What is you name girl?"

"Rey." She answered quietly as to not have it echo again. It didn't work.

"Are you afraid?"

She didn't answer she kept her eyes forward. Of course she was afraid she thought, she could die any second. She survived all that time alone just to die with no answers of her past, somewhere where the only person that cared about her, that left her on Jakku, couldn't find her.

"Look at me girl."

She jumped at the volume of his voice and looked up at him. She finally looked at him rather than trying to look through him. His clothes were old, she saw rips in his tunic and black cloak. They were faded with age, just as she thought he would be. She finally saw his face and realized that he was faded with age much more than what he wore. He had no mask, he didn't need one. The first thing she noticed was the deep scar that started just at his brow going to what she could assume was the top of his head. She didn't really know with how much taller he was. Pale blue eyes that were set deep in his skull, they were bright, she could see her outline in them. She looked so insignificant in his eyes reflection. The skin on his face much like that on his hands, grey and almost translucent. His face with deep lines, at least on one side. The other side of his face looked as if had melted, there were openings in his skin from his cheek to his jaw line. His nose was a bit crooked, and his mouth was small and pursed. Her breath hitched in her chest.

"I'll ask again, are you afraid?"

She nodded. She couldn't lie, and anyone that stood where she was right now would be lying if they had said no.

She watched as he walked away from her towards the monster. He stood straighter at his master's approach.

"Train her in our ways, I will call upon you when I deem it is time to see her progress." He said, his voice still calm, but not with any softness that he spoke to her with.

"And if she refuses Master?"

The beast and his Master both looked at her. "Then kill her." The Master replied coldly.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He watched as his Master lifted out of his throne and walked towards the girl, he felt her fear, but she didn't move as closed in on her. He couldn't see her face, but noticed that she didn't look up.

"You are younger than I would have thought. Finally I get to meet the girl who has given Master of the Knights of Ren so much trouble."

He knew that was said just to remind him of one of his latest failures. Any time his master had a chance to remind him of such he would. He scowled at the thought.

"I'm not sure." She said, he had noticed a small twitch from her. Was he in her mind? Searching through her life? Seeing all her loneliness, and the pain she endured throughout her life as he did to him so long ago.

"Rey." She said, it echoed through the room.

Her name, he now knew her name! He no longer had to call her girl, or scavenger. It fit her well remembering the yellow aura that swirled around her.

He saw her jump, he knew that his master was inside her head, searching. He wanted to stand beside her, to try to give her some strength. He knew that she was running low on it. She hadn't eaten since he didn't know when. He hadn't even thought of feeding her, giving her water, damn! He hadn't even let her use a refresher to relieve herself this whole time. He couldn't believe he had neglected her. It bothered him. It bothered him even more that he was bothered by it at all.

He saw her nod, answering questions from his master that only she could hear.

He saw his master walking towards him and straightened his posture to attention.

"Train her in our ways, I will call upon you when I deem it is time to see her progress."

He let out a silent breath of relief that he didn't even realize he was holding.

What if she refuses? He had seen how stubborn she was, what if she wouldn't be taught, what if she would never join their mission with the First Order? "And if she refuses Master?"

"Then kill her." He said waving his hand and going back to his throne.

Kylo collected his prisoner and left the Supreme Leaders chambers. She didn't fight him when he put his hand under her elbow to guide her out of the ominous room.

Now all he had to do was make her see why she needed to let him teach her, if she had any care for her life she would need to listen.

He led her out the corridor that they entered from and led her to living chambers deeper in the temple.


	9. Chapter 9

**Rey**

"Then kill her." The words repeated in her head. If she wanted to live there was no choice, she would have to serve the beasts master. Unless, of course she found a way to escape. She wasn't dead yet. The beast would have to sleep at some time, she would sneak out then. Take his ship and run far far away. Of course that is if he didn't keep her locked up all the time. Oh stars! She is a prisoner, she will have to stay in a cell, locked up. There would never be a chance.

She was so lost in thought she wasn't even watching where they were going, she was being led by him and didn't even know where they were. She vaguely remembered turning at one point, maybe even a couple of times. How would she escape when she wasn't even paying attention to how she got where she was.

They entered a small room, it was also lit by torches on the walls. She noticed a bed, a small table and a small couch. It wasn't the cell she expected to be sent to.

"Rest, use the bed if you wish. The refresher is just through that door, use it if you need."

The bed looked delightful, she had never slept in an actually bed before. She had a pallet on Jakku but it was made from anything soft she could find which wasn't much, it was lumpy and flat in most places.

Then it dawned on her what a refresher was. She had been holding her bladder for ages. She ran for the door and just stood in the doorway confused. There was no pot or bucket to relieve herself, not even a hole in the floor. There was a glass box in the corner of the room, a chair of some sort on the other and a faucet with a bowl under it on the wall.

She felt him behind her, the tickle he would bring with him when he got to close. "The chair, lift the top."

She ran to the toilet, slamming the door behind her and lifting the seat.

Finished she stood up and heard the seat whoosh behind her, it made her jump. She watched water flow down the sides of the bowl and thought what a waste of something so precious. She went to the faucet and lifted the handle, water flowed. She realized that her mouth felt like she had eaten half the sand on Jakku. She tilted her head and put her lips on the flowing water. It was bliss as she drank, the cool water over her lips. She drank for minutes until she felt full with it.

Her stomach started to bubble and churn, she moved quickly over to the toilet and her stomach emptied. She just sat there on the floor resting her head on the cool edge of the toilet. She wasn't even sure if she had enough energy to stand up. She laid down on the hard cool floor and sleep.

 **Kylo Ren**

He didn't even think about her not knowing what a refresher was. He had always had such comforts throughout his life, and when there was none it helped he was a man so it was simple.

He unlatched his helmet and pulled it over his head. The fresh air was nice. He had grown used to the helmet, it was like a second skin that he was normally comfortable in. It gave him confidence. He sat on the couch, putting his helmet on the table. With his elbows on his knees he held his head.

He was relieved of given the chance to train the girl… No, not the girl. Rey. And if she valued her life she would learn from him, she would call him master.

He looked towards the door, she was still in there. He wondered if she was hiding from him. He went over to the door and knocked. There was no answer. There was no escape from the refresher so he wasn't worried about that. She was most likely ignoring him.

"Rey?" He asked opening the door, it was the first time he said her name out loud since learning it. He saw her sleeping on the floor and lifted her up taking her to the bed in the other room, gently placing her in it. He watched her as she slept. Her face was peaceful, there was no fear, or anger, or his favorite defiance. He knew it wasn't good for her to be so bold towards him. When he did start her training he couldn't tolerate such from her.

He sat on the bed next to her, he was exhausted. Normally he didn't get much sleep but just being around this girl was like trying to maneuver his ship through an asteroid filled nebula. She was physically, mentally, and emotionally draining.

Getting up to make sure the door was secured and there were no sharp objects in the room, or anything remotely dangerous that she could use to kill him in his sleep if she were to wake before him, he stretched on the couch and closed his eyes remembering how she looked when she smiled at him. He fell asleep with her smiling face burned into his mind.

* * *

He woke up and saw she was still sleeping, she was so small, looked so fragile. He knew better about her. She was a survivor, a fighter, and as his apprentice she would learn be so much more.

He didn't know how long they had slept but he felt better. He needed to get them fed and away from this place as soon as possible. Being at the Sith temple made the force within him stronger, there was no denying it, but he didn't wish to be around his master more than needed. With Snoke so close he knew he could feel his unease that the light still called to him as Rey called to him. He had to do something to erase it completely from him.

He ordered food from a droid that was outside his door and went to the refresher to shower. He preferred staying on the Finalizer, everything was clean, sanitized. His quarters were clean here, but dust still seemed to get in no matter how far inside the belly of the temple they were.

As he showered he felt that she had woken up. His collar started to throb in pain, and he felt… excitement? Damn! He realized she was going to try to escape.

He quickly left the shower, wrapped a towel around his waist and jerked open the door. He saw her by the entrance, the face of the pad had been removed and wires exposed. She jumped at the sound of the door, turning to see him her eyes widened and her cheeks started to turn bright pink.

* * *

 **Rey**

She awoke with her shoulder throbbing remembering all that had happened that put her in this strange situation. Meeting with the Supreme Leader of the First Order, and him ordering her death if she didn't comply. Being on the ship with the monster, the confusion she experienced, him tending her wounds, hearing him laugh. Being shoved down the stairs. The interrogation where she saw the monster without his mask, his handsome features and deep brown eyes.

She noticed that he wasn't in the room and heard running water in the refresher. This was her chance, she scrambled off the bed and ran to the pad beside the door. She tried to get it loose with her fingers but it wouldn't budge. The only thing that it did was cut the tips of her fingers which made trying to lift the face of the pad harder.

She franticly looked around for anything she could find to wedge it off but it seemed that there was nothing in the room. She felt defeated and rested against the door, then she noticed the table in front of her, it was made of wood. She ran to the table and started to knock the leg hard on the stone floor. Pain shot through her shoulder every time she hit the table to the floor but after a few times it broke. It wasn't a perfect wedge but it might be enough to pry the pad.

She ran back to the pad trying to fit the wood wedge into the corner to pry it up, hitting the top of it with her hand. She gnashed her teeth from pain and frustration.

Finally after a 6 or 7 hits it slipped between the wall and pad. She couldn't believe it! She had done it! Prying the pad face up and exposing the wires below excitement grew. She would get the door open, find her way out and steal his ship. She would finally be free of that monster and his master!

She heard a loud bang as the door of the refresher slammed open and saw him. She was in shock of being caught, she was in more shock when she saw his state of undress. He stood their dripping with water wearing nothing but a towel around his waist.

If she were shocked at what he looked like without his mask she was even more so without his clothes! She had known he was tall, but his thin figure carried no fat. His wide chest narrowed perfectly to his muscled stomach, the crease of his hips forming a V towards a patch of black hair, that lead to….

Oh stars Rey! Don't think about where that hair leads to! She felt her face burning from where her eyes were roaming.

Her stomach started to do flips and she thought she was going to get sick again, but she couldn't move. She had been caught trying to escape. It had been so perfect, she would have gotten away! It unnerved her with him standing there, staring at her with those eyes. She had to get away from him, and the sooner the better.

She needed a weapon, then remembered the broken table leg. She gathered all her courage, she would need it to do what she had to do with no regrets. She was a prisoner that needed to escape her cell, but mostly her capturer.

She quickly reached for the piece of wood and rushed him holding it above her head ready to stab him. As she started to bring her arm down to pierce him she felt the crushing strength of his hand around her wrist forcing her to drop her makeshift weapon. Just before he used her wrist to turn her around and raising her arm behind her she could have sworn she was smirking.

She knew he had won, when she tried to struggle against him he would force her arm up further causing pain to shoot through her shoulder. The image of him smirking ran through her head, it pissed her off.


	10. Chapter 10

**Kylo Ren**

He watched as she rushed him, a piece of wood in her hand ready to stab him. A smile flashed on his face, she was quick but not quick enough to stab Master of the Knights of Ren. He grabbed her wrist, and the makeshift weapon fell to the floor. He spun her around and lifted her arm behind her so she couldn't escape. He felt the anger radiate from her. It just fueled him further. It would be easy to have her choose the Dark Side if she were to keep the path she was going. He would just need to teach her how to use the force, manipulate it to do her will… to help him do his.

He dipped his mouth beside her ear, electricity from the link they shared tickled his lips. He wanted nothing more than nip her ear with his teeth. "That was foolish, I could kill you if I wanted. I could snap you in half without even touching you… if I wanted."

He didn't want to hurt her this way, he didn't want her to fear him, she was going to be his apprentice after all.

He could feel his lust stirring with her so near, smelling her skin. She didn't smell clean, but not dirty either. She smelled natural. Her hair was soft against his face like a fine silken fabric. He wondered if she had ever been with a man when he noticed she was trembling. "Why are you trembling Rey?" He wanted to hear it was because he was so close to her, that she felt the desire that he did.

* * *

 **Rey**

She felt his breath at her ear, tickling it with his magic, or whatever he called it. Her breathing was short and erratic from him being so close. Her stomach still fluttering, churning. Her skin was growing warmer. She felt like her body was screaming at her in pain, and something else. She wasn't sure of what though.

"That was foolish, I could kill you if I wanted. I could snap you in half without even touching you… if I wanted." He whispered in her ear. Her eyes closed from his melodic voice and she had to stop herself before she leaned into him. She just wanted these feeling to stop, she had never felt like this in her life. Though it could stop, and she knew it, just by the words he spoke. She knew he was right, she was thinking about the man he killed on his battlecruiser. He was on the other side of the room and was choked the life out of one of the troopers that had collected her.

She started to shake, she couldn't help it. She tried to make her body to stop, but it wouldn't listen to her. Pain, fear, and unknown feelings racked through her body.

"Why are you trembling Rey?" His voice husky in her ear.

She didn't know what to say, she just wanted it all to stop. All she could say was "I surrender."

As soon as the words came out of her mouth she was being spun around towards him, his hand lifting her chin up to look at him, his lips crashing upon hers. His lips were so full, so soft but pressed so hard upon hers. She stood there, rigid and unmoving. She didn't know what to do, the monster was kissing her. She could feel his arms around her back, her hands on his chest. The charge between them was so strong. Suddenly her thoughts went back to Jakku and the man who had snuck into her AT-AT trying to touch her, the man who tried to rape her.

She used all her strength to push him away, she didn't want to be raped by this monster. She would rather she die than to have that.

She felt him release her, the tickle gone. She no longer felt sick to her stomach as she backed away from him. Her eyes were darting around the room trying to find somewhere she could run, she knew she couldn't get away from him. If he wanted to take her he could. Her body was screaming at her in pain from her collar, fire traveled throughout the right side of her body. 'You know I can take whatever I want.' She heard inside her head. It was what he had said to her when he first captured her. It felt so long ago but she knew it couldn't have been more than 2 days, or even less.

He was standing there, still mostly naked though she didn't see him as she did just minutes earlier. His muscular figure didn't hold her in a trance now, there was no embarrassment in looking at his body. Her eyes moved to his face. His hair was still wet, drops of water dripping on his shoulders. His face held no emotion, at least until she looked in his eyes. She saw desperation in them, and so much sadness. Looking into his eyes she wanted to reach out and comfort him.

Where did that crazy notion come from she wondered. Comfort him? The monster? What would a monster need to be comforted from? She needed to remember that even without the restrains she was still a prisoner.

"We leave within the hour." He said as she watched him return to the refresher and closed the door.

She was so confused, everything he did confused her. Nothing he did was predictable.

"And don't even think about escaping Rey." She heard from behind the door.

Stars! She completely forgot that all she had to do was find the correct wiring to disable and open the door. She stared at the door, not moving and inch, hope draining from her mind, and soul.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He went back into the refresher to dress waring her not to try to escape again, his thoughts on what had just transpired. With two words she undid any composure he had in the situation. He couldn't get the feel of her lips from his, her tiny body against his. Her lips didn't respond to kiss kiss and he could feel her confusion, then her fear. Her small hands pushing against his chest to get away from him, to make him stop.

He saw the terror on her face, her body. Damn! Apparently he had read everything wrong but he could have sworn that he had felt her lust. It radiated from her from when he caught her in her escape attempt, and she had seen him in nothing but a towel.

Dressed he left the refresher and saw that she didn't try to escape, she hadn't even moved from the spot he left her in. He walked by her without even looking her way and went to collect their breakfast, it was simple, fruit and bread and set it on the bed.

He finally looked at her, he knew she needed to eat. "Rey?" His voice mechanical.

Him saying her name seemed to snap her out her trance, and she looked at him. She looked so defeated, so lost. He wanted to go to her to hold her and let her know that he would never hurt her. Unless he was ordered to kill her… NO, he wouldn't allow that to happen, he would make her learn, make her see how foolish it would be if she refused.

"Eat, we must leave soon."

She went to the bed, staying as far away from him as possible. He watched her as she took some bread and ate it silently. He remembered all the experience he had with women and he went back to the one that he knew best, his mother. She couldn't be made to do anything she didn't want to do, and Rey is just as headstrong the princess. He would have to think of something different, he would need to get her to trust him. He preferred it that way anyway, especially since an apprentice need to trust their master, and vice versa.

He sat on the bed opposite of her, "Rey?" He saw her jump. "I don't know what came over me, it will never happen again."

She looked up at him, he could see the conflict in her eyes, and feel it through the force.

"Please don't call me that."

He smirked behind the mask, at least she wasn't completely broken. "It is your name is it not?"

"Yes, but reserved to be spoken by people that I don't despise."

It was working, he just needed to press the right buttons. He knew she didn't hate him like she thought she did remembering the feelings that she emitted towards him. "We will eat, you will bathe and we will go. I can't have you weak and making my command ship smell like I just transported a pack of tauntauns."

The fire returned to her eyes, she bit into the Karvasa fruit she was holding. "Let me tell you something monster. If you would have just left me be with my friends then your precious ship wouldn't even had a dirty scavenger on it!" She said with her mouth full, chewing and talking at the same time. "And one other thing," another bite, "oh stars, what is this? It's amazing!" She said looking at the fruit in her hand, then back at him wiping the juice from the corner of her mouth. "You have a stupid mask!"

He knew that whatever spell she was under it was now broken. He smiled, he had gotten her back, now he just needed to get her to trust him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Rey**

She was enjoying being under the falling water. She used his soap, it smelled so fresh. It reminded her of the smell of the trees in Takodana. The monster had given her another shot for her pain before she went into the refresher which she was grateful for. Thinking about it there was a lot that she was grateful for that the monster provided since she had found herself in this predicament, though he was the reason she was in it at all. All she wanted to do was get the little droid to the resistance and go back to Jakku to wait for her loved ones to come back for her.

She thought about Fin again and wondered if he was long gone working on the trade ship. About Han and Chewie, surely with them being heroes they would know where the resistance base was and would have gotten the droid their safely. Would the resistance be able to find Luke Skywalker? She was hoping so. She would listen to stories late at night in town usually by the older generation of when the Empire tumbled. Stories of the last Jedi warrior Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and the smuggler Han Solo. She would listen then go back to her AT-AT and have dreams of all their adventures. Now she was on an adventure of sorts of her own.

A knock on the door made her come back to reality, leaving the embrace of the warm water, she dried herself and put on her clothes. Now that she was clean, really clean she could smell that her clothes weren't so much, that they did indeed smell bad. She wanted to put her hair up in the buns she was so used to wearing but didn't have the leather ties anymore so she used her fingers to get the tangles out of her hair.

When she opened the door she saw him pacing the small room, his cape billowing behind him. He looked like a caged creature looking for an escape.

"We've got to go, and fast."

She knew he wanted to leave, but didn't understand the sudden urgency. "Huh?"

"I've got to get to General Hux before he destroys any more planets!"

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

While Kylo was trying to think of ways to gain the girls trust he got an incoming message from Phasma informing him that General Hux had learned the coordinates of the main resistance base and had plans to use the Starkiller.

He couldn't let that happen if it were true. The First Order wasn't supposed to work like that. They were supposed to help planets that needed it, to make the galaxy better, not destroy everything in its way. At one point the General had to learn that politics was sometimes better than destruction.

In his impatience he knocked on the door hoping it would make her hurry. He had to move, he started pacing the room. It wasn't big enough for him, nothing like his quarters on the Finalizer, he felt as if he didn't leave soon he would go crazy.

He had to do something, he would change Hux's mind with or without the force if he had to. Hux wasn't a simple minded man, but with help of the dark side, and even his short time at the sith temple he was stronger and could invade the redheads mind.

He had his own plans for the princess, and if it was true and the BB8 unit was with Han Solo then he would most likely also be there. He would usually stay up to a week when he would go back to her.

Pacing the room he heard her open the door.

"We've got to go, and fast."

He noticed confusion on her face, "Huh?"

"I've got to get to General Hux before he destroys any more planets." He had to tell her, hoping she would understand the urgency. He saw her eyes grow wide.

* * *

Neither of them spoke in the hours it took to get to the Starkiller, they were both in their own thoughts, both feeding on each others anxious energy. He was relieve to see that it was still at Ilum.

They landed in the Hanger, "You stay behind me. Do not say anything no matter what is said to you. If a question is asked, you will let me answer it." He told her. He knew that she was brave, but he needed to let everyone know she was under his protection.

Her face twisted in disgust. "And you can't do that either." He needed to be in control, he needed everyone to know he was in control. If they saw anything like that it could also damage his image. Once everyone knew that she was his apprentice it could be different. He also knew it wouldn't take long for everyone to learn what she was to him. The stormtroopers and crew didn't have much more to do than train and talk.

He heard her sigh and she nodded.

* * *

 **Rey**

She knew he was right, this was his element, his real home, but it didn't mean she had to like it. She watched as he strode to the door, he was back to being intimidating, back to the creature she knew he was, but she couldn't forget how he treated her. How he held her trying to sooth her when she was in pain. How it must have been him that laid her in the bed finding her asleep on the refresher floor.

Her thoughts were mainly on everything that had passed the past couple of days and how curious he was to her. This monster that put her through so much pain at the beginning of their meeting, then went out of his way to ease it. This monster that was in such a rush to save a planet. Wasn't the First Order about destruction of anything that didn't agree to their propaganda? Was he First Order she wondered, Supreme Leader had called him Master of the Knights of Ren. Was he just a warrior that fought for Supreme Leader? There were still so many unanswered questions about everything around her, about everyone around her.

Just before he dialed the code for the ramp to lower she stoped him. "Wait!" He stopped and glanced behind him. "What do I call you?" She still wanted to know his name.

"Master." His mechanical voice said.

She snorted, there was no way she would call him that, she had no master, she may be a prisoner, but she wasn't a slave. "You mean Monster?" she said with a smirk.

"Rey…" He said with a warning.

"Let's go save a planet." She said with a sigh.

She watched as he opened the ramp and went down, apprehension filled her, her legs felt heavy and didn't want to move. It was just like being in the forest where she tried to move but couldn't though this time it was her nervousness being surrounded by so many enemies.

Finally her legs moved, he was already ahead of her talking to a trooper wearing silver. Going down the ramp she heard someone yell.

"Escaped prisoner!"

She saw troopers gathering, blasters pointed at her, she heard the shot but didn't feel anything. She had squeezed her eyes shut expecting to be shot but, nothing. She opened her eyes to see a blaster shot hovering in the air just inches from her chest. The beast was beside her in no time, he put his hand on her back, she could feel the tickle from his touch again. His touch put her at ease, She didn't like it that it comforted her, it wasn't natural that the enemy could do this to her.

"This is my apprentice, I her master!" His mechanical voice boomed through the hanger, menacing and demanding respect and fear. "To anyone that feels it necessary to attempt her life will answer to me!" She saw that he was staring at the special storm trooper in silver.

She saw all the troopers look around and lower their blasters and let out the breath she was holding, but then she looked at the round that was still at her chest. An instant reminder that her life could be over just like that.

The monster guided her away from the ship and flicked his hand towards the blaster round, it changed direction and hit the trooper who had fired upon her. He continued to guide her out of the hanger.

* * *

 **A/N: To those wondering where the romance is, it's going to come. Rey is headstrong so it wouldn't make sense that she would just jump in his arms, he is still the enemy after all. To those that have reviewed and followed, thank you, ya'll are the reason I continue posting.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Kylo Ren**

He knew Captain Phasma wouldn't be pleased that another of her troopers would be put in medbay at his hands, but at least it was clear to everyone that Rey was off limits.

He heard her footsteps coming up beside him and knew she would say something about the incidents, she was good at what she did commanding the First Orders troopers.

"You know Ren, if you keep killing and injuring our soldiers we will never win this war."

He grinned, the Captain and he would butt heads at times but they had one major thing in common. They both couldn't stand Hux. "I sincerely apologize Captain, you know I've been working on my anger management." He glanced at Rey to see how she was taking everything and was surprised that she was doing exactly as he asked. She was looking straight ahead keeping a straight face.

"Yes Ren, everyone knows that isn't your strongest area. We must discuss the matter at hand once you've dropped your…. Apprentice in her quarters then we can meet."

He didn't like the questioning the captain had about Rey. He also knew time was of the essence. "We will go to my quarters Captain, this needs to be discussed immediately and in private."

Phasma nodded. They both knew that practically everywhere had security, hardly anything was private, even the captains quarters were kept under surveillance. His might have been at one point but he had demolished everything during his fits of rage refusing replacement of anything other than furniture which he had inspected thoroughly.

The three walked in silence until they reached his quarters, dialing the code the doors lifted open.

* * *

 **Rey**

Ren… His name was Ren. She did exactly as he said, she tried to show no emotion, no surprise when she heard the two bantering with each other. This woman wasn't intimidated by him and treated him as a friend. What kind of friend was she? The kind that went to bars and drank together? She tried not to smile as she pictured the two of them sitting in Maz's bar trying to figure out how to drink their Ebla Beer without taking off their helmets.

They arrived at his quarters, walking in she couldn't hide her shock. The walls looked as if a wild beast had been locked in and clawed the walls looking for escape. It was sparse in furniture, there was a large black metal desk in the middle of the room, a simple chair sat across from it. A black leather couch at just to the right of her and a black metal table in front of it.

He guided her to the couch "Rey, rest here. I have business to attend."

She did as he asked and sat on the couch, and practically melted in its softness, running her hands side to side just to feel it on her fingers. The Captain and Ren went to his desk to talk though they didn't even sit down.

She tried to listen but, between the two sounding like machines more than human and them speaking in such low tones she could only pick up a few words. Her hands still running up and down on the couch watching them. She saw Ren look at her periodically, at least she though he was. She couldn't tell when he was wearing that stupid mask.

She saw that the Captain turned to leave, she didn't even look down at her on her way out, but she watched the captain. She still wondered what kind of past the two shared, she wondered if they had been lovers… if they were still lovers. Something about that thought didn't sit right with her, it made something inside of her bubble in anger.

She shook it off when he walked towards her. He held out his hand. Why did men always do that? Always trying to help a woman? She looked up at him and raised her eyebrow and stood up without his help.

"How are you feeling?"

She knew he was asking about her collar and it did hurt a little, the shot he gave her earlier wearing off a bit, but she didn't want to let him know about it. "What happened to the walls? Did you keep a Rancor as a pet?"

"It's part of my anger management." He replied.

She couldn't help but smile. Though it was terrifying at the same time.

"I've got to go take care of this, I can't let Hux get away with destroying another planet." She could hear the resolve in his voice. She nodded her head in agreement.

"The refresher is just through there" he said motioning towards the back of the room. "Can you read?"

She couldn't believe he just as asked her that. "Of course I can read!" She defended herself. "What because I'm a lowly scavenger you assume I can't read!" She was getting angry, she couldn't believe his arrogance.

"Rey… I didn't mean it that way."

She didn't want him saying her name, especially since with him just assuming she may or may not be able to read. "It sure did sound like it _Ren"_

She heard him sigh as he walked to his desk and pulled out an old book.

"What is this? Beginners guide to being a sleemo?" She insulted as she snatched the leather book from him.

"No, this is a journal written by a young Jedi named Skywalker."

She felt a twinge guilt at her rough handling of the journal. This was written by a hero, Luke Skywalker! "How did you get Luke Skywalkers journal?"

"It's not Luke's."

She didn't understand, she looked at him brows furrowed.

"It was Luke's fathers' journal. I would like you to read it while I'm saving the galaxy."

She snorted. He was trying to make himself sound like a hero, which when she thought about it if he were to save that doomed plant wouldn't he be?

"I will return as soon as I can Rey."

She watched him as he walked out the door. He didn't tell her not to escape or any other threats to her life. She still couldn't understand him at all. She wanted to see him as the enemy, he had caused her pain, physical and emotional. He could kill her any time he wanted but instead he asked about her welfare. She thought about him standing there with only a towel around his waist, water dripping down his pale skin, dripping down his stomach to the V of a trail of dark hair. She felt her skin warming, her stomach started to flip again. She couldn't understand why she would get sick being near him, or even now thinking of him. He revolted her to the point of physical illness.

Sitting on the couch she opened the journal and started to read.

She was on her third time of reading the journal when the doors lifted open and Ren had walked in, he didn't look at her. She could feel the anger surrounding him, sparking in the air. She watched has he walked towards the desk. She noticed his lightsaber in his hand, it ignited, the red menacing blade, unstable, it crackled and hummed. She watched as he slashed at the desk, turning it into a heap on garbage pieces melting onto the floor. This was the monster she remembered. She remembered the fear on Takoanda when he held it up to her face, threating her with the deadly saber. She knew then that she could never let her guard down with this man, he was unstable, just like his weapon.

She watched his back, saw his shoulders rising and falling with each breath he took.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He stood there looking at the demolished desk. He was reliving the meeting he had with Hux, the smugness the General seemed to have. He had stopped the destruction of D'Qar temporarily but if he couldn't recover the main players of the resistance then he wouldn't be able to save it.

He could feel her distress behind him, but it couldn't been helped. He had to destroy something. Snoke would have punished him if it was Hux. For some reason Supreme Leader wanted to keep the son of a bitch alive, and he had already done enough damage to Phasmas soldiers.

He needed to get off this death planet and go back to the Finalizer. He needed to come up with a plan to gather the officers of the resistance. To collect her!

He turned and looked at Rey, she was sitting on the couch, her knees up to her chest staring at him. Her face didn't show any emotions, but he knew through the force that she was frightened of what she saw, frightened of him.

"We are leaving." He didn't give her anything to go with, he knew she could feel his anger. He was the master after all, her the apprentice, it was time that they started acting like it.

"Ren?" Her voice small.

"Master! Damn it Rey! When you address me, you address me as MASTER!" He yelled, anger still flowing through him. He would start her training now, starting with protocol between master and apprentice.

He noticed her knuckles white holding the journal, her hazel eyes burning, chin set. "I will not!" She said through gritted teeth. "There are many things I call you, but Master? That will never happen."

He smiled, she wanted to fight? He would give her one, maybe even a wager. "You still wish to kill me?"

He felt emotions rolling off of her, he could feel she didn't want him dead, but she wouldn't mind him in pain, at her hands.

"Yes."

This is good he thought. "How about a wager?"

She looked at him with curiosity, and he could see the apprehension on her face.

"We fight, if I win you call me Master."

He would win, and was surprised she was defiantly thinking about it. "And if I win?"

He thought about it and knew what she wanted most. "I take you back to Jakku."


	13. Chapter 13

**Rey**

She knew she wouldn't be able to win a fight with him, but she had to try. She would try anything to go back to Jakku. Sure she would go to sleep at times with an empty stomach but that was better than being held by a mentally unstable monster who could get angry and kill her without even touching her.

"I accept!"

"Come with me then." She could hear the amusement in his voice and was determined to win.

She followed him to a large room with all kinds of weapons hanging on the walls. She saw blasters, axes, swords, staffs anything that could be used in a war.

"Choose your weapon Rey." He said, his hand motioning towards the wall of weapons.

She went to the wall considering her choices she set the journal on the floor and lifted a staff from its hooks. She spun it in her hands feeling the weight of it, the balance. She noticed that the top was too heavy and put it back. She chose another and spun it as well. The weight was lighter and it balanced well. She had found what she would use to go back to Jakku.

She stood in front of him, his size looming over her. What have I gotten myself into? She asked herself. "Take off your stupid mask Ren." To her surprise he did. She still couldn't get over how boyishly handsome he was, how his thick dark locks fell over his brow. Her stomach flipped wondering how soft it would be if she ran her fingers through it.

She saw him smile, she didn't like it. He knew he had the advantage. She needed to focus, she should have never asked him to take off his helmet.

He dropped the helmet to the floor and brought up his saber. She needed to get that smile off his face. She swung, he parried the attempt. He then swung at her, she had to back up at the strength of the hit to the staff. He didn't stop, he just kept coming at her with wide swings that she would deflect, but it made her back up all the same. She felt the wall at her back, she was trapped, she had nowhere to go, though she wouldn't let him win. She broke the connection with his saber, ducking and swinging her staff to catch him at the back of his knees. She saw him stumble and rolled away from the wall. He had gained his balance by the time she was getting back to her feet, his saber pointed at her face.

Her body was screaming at her, her collar and shoulder felt like it was on fire. Her breathing was hard, it felt as her lungs were about to burst.

She looked at him past his lightsaber and he was smiling. She couldn't believe it, the smug son of a blaster hadn't even broken a sweat.

"So, Rey…. What do you call me?" She could hear the victory in his voice and hated it.

"Monster." She said quietly looking at the floor dropping the staff.

She heard his laughter and snapped her head up. He had disengaged his saber and had it latched to his belt already. Her stomach flipping she was again afraid she would get sick at his feet. "You make me sick!" She spat which made him laugh even harder. She threw her staff at his feet in frustration and turned to leave.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He couldn't help but laugh when she called him Monster, he knew that she wouldn't call him Master, it wasn't in her nature. She would eventually when she felt he wouldn't hurt her, when he could get her to trust him.

"You make me sick!"

That made him laugh even harder, so much his muscles were actually starting to hurt from it. He watched as she threw her staff at his feet and turned to leave.

He reached out and grabbed her hand before she was out of reach. The electricity between them tickling his hands, he knew it did hers as well. "Rey." He needed to talk to her about their teachings.

She looked at his hand on hers, and then at him. "Sit, we need to talk." He sat on the floor lightly pulling on her hand to do the same. He smiled when she sighed and did the same, then pulling her hand out of his. He had so much to teach this girl, so much she could do if she would just learn from him. He didn't necessarily want her to go to the dark side, and would prefer if she didn't. She was a pull to the light for him which made him wonder with their link, then their bond if she had always been that pull even before meeting her.

She didn't say anything, just sat and looked at him, curious yet frustrated.

"You need a teacher, if you don't have one you could hurt someone, hurt yourself with the power of the force. You need to learn how to control it." He didn't say it to scare her, it was the truth. If she couldn't control it or even understand it could be the death of her or others around her. He watched for a reaction and it seemed to him that she was actually taking in what he was telling her. "I'm not asking you to use the dark side of the force or the light, I just want you to understand it. A life of a Jedi is lonely, their teachings have no real emotion, and they aren't allowed to have attachments, or a family."

He watched her brow furrow, chewing at her bottom lip thinking deeply on what he was saying. "There is no emotion, there is no peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death, there is the force. That is the Jedi creed. I never understood it, it never called to me. How can someone live without emotion Rey? If there is no ignorance then there is no reason to seek knowledge! If there is no passion why would life be worth living? If there is no chaos how would you know when there is harmony? There is always death, and there is always the force!" Just explaining it to her he became emotional. He couldn't ever understand the creed, life was given to experience all the things a Jedi couldn't have.

"What is the creed of the dark side?" She asked.

He liked that she was asking questions, that she was showing interest. She may not realize it but with just that simple act she had accepted him as her teacher, her master.

"There is a Sith creed Rey, but know that I'm no Sith."

"Well what is that creed?"

"Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The force shall free me." He watched her as she took it all in. He wanted nothing more than take her hands in his. He was nervous that she would still refuse thinking that all he wanted was power after hearing the Sith creed.

She didn't say anything for a minute and he could sense her confusion, her mind working inside that beautiful head. He didn't mind though, he was enjoying just watching her, she would chew on her lip at times, he watched as her hair would fall in her face and she would use her delicate fingers to put it behind her ear. Her brow would furrow, then rest. Her hands in her lap she would pick at her fingernails.

"So there is a dark and a light?" She asked him looking in his eyes, he could tell she was just trying to figure it all out. He nodded. "Then… is there an… an in-between?"

He smiled sincerely at her, his Rey… so curious, trying to find a way to have both. "No, there is no Grey."

They sat for a while, he would just watch her, and her lost in thought. Neither of them moving, neither speaking, he was almost in a meditative state just watching her. He was going to give her the time she needed to mull over what was discussed. He gave her the choice, he let her know that he was just going to teach her of the force. Dark… Light… To him it is all just the force, the only difference is how you used it. Though tapping into his emotions and passions made him more powerful with it than his Jedi teachings ever would have. The only reason he hated the pull to the light was that it made him weaker than he would be if he could submit to the dark side completely.

"Ren?" She said in almost a whisper. It snapped him out of his semi meditative state.

"Yes?"

"Can we leave this horrible place?"

He agreed, he wanted to be back on the Finalizer, that was his home now, where he felt most comfortable. He stood up and put his hand out to help her up. He smiled when she slapped it away and got up on her own. He used the force to call for his helmet, it flew right into his hand placing it back on. Then he used it again to collect the journal, giving it to Rey.


	14. Chapter 14

**Rey**

She sat in the back of the command ship in a corner on the floor. They had gone straight from the training room to the hanger without saying a word to each other which she was grateful for. She kept going over what he told her about the Jedi, Sith, and the force.

She agreed with Ren about not having a family, that's all her life had been about was waiting for hers to come back and collect her from Jakku. She knew that whomever had left her there must have had a good reason, they must have loved her and they would be back for her, but she wasn't there anymore. Greif flooded her, she would never know the family that was coming back for her. What if they had already returned and looking for her, they wouldn't know that she was being held prisoner by the First Order. If she were to never get back to Jakku she would never have a family.

Which brought her back to Fin, the storm trooper who went rouge, her first friend. She had hoped he had made it to the outter rim, she hoped that her friend was safe and away from the First Order. She knew that if they ever found him he would be executed as a traitor, which was he really? He didn't sign up to be a storm trooper, they took him from a family and warped his small mind as a child to support them, to do their bidding. How could he be a traitor to something he was required to support?

She looked at the journal that was laying in her lap, thinking about Anakin Skywalker and his love for Padme. How this boy was born a slave, but became a Jedi. The man who wrote such beautiful words about the woman he would give his life for, the woman who carried his children. She wondered if there would ever be a person that could feel that way for her. Could someone love a scavenger from Jakku or did that only happen with beautiful Queens. She remembered the sketch of Padme Amidala that he had penciled in the journal and she was indeed beautiful, and smart, and strong. Someone that could easily find love.

She placed her face in her hands and the tears started to fall from her eyes partially from all the loss she had suffered lately, and believing her to be unlovable.

She jumped when she felt his touch on her shoulder, the tickle that it caused. She looked up, he was kneeling beside her, he wasn't wearing his mask, and she saw the concern in his brown eyes. Before she knew what she was doing she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried on his shoulder.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He could feel her sadness, it was crushing him. He wanted to go to her, sooth her. He got up and found her in a corner on the floor crying into her hands. He had to stop it somehow. He knelt down beside her and rested his hand on her shoulder, just so she knew that she wasn't alone, to try to calm her through their bond. Before he knew it her arms were around his neck and she was sobbing into his shoulder.

He wrapped his arms around her, holding her, letting her use his shoulder to catch her tears. He remembered when he was a child crying, usually when his father would leave and he was afraid that he wouldn't come back, his mother would hold him. She would stroke his hair telling him that his father would be back and not the worry.

He sat on the hard floor and lifted her into his lap, she allowed him, still crying but not as much as before. He had cradled her like he would a child. Taking off his glove with his teeth and setting it aside he used his thumb to dry her tears. He needed her to calm down for her sake, but mostly his. Her sorrow was overwhelming him and he would do anything to make it stop, but she seemed to cry even harder after he dried her tear. Damn it! He didn't know what to do! This was unknown territory for him.

He put his other hand around her and hugged her to his chest, and started to rock her like his mother would do for him. She was still crying but it started to slow, he kept rocking until her tears quit. He felt her breathing had steadied, she had gone to sleep in his arms. He loosened his hug around her so he could see her face. It was blotchy and red but he still thought her beautiful, she was his light, and he never wanted it extinguished.

They were at the Finalizer, just suspended in space, he didn't want to wake her, enjoying her in his arms. He looked at the journal that laid on floor and knew how his grandfather felt, the over powering emotions that he had for his grandmother. He was in love with the scavenger and would do anything in his power to protect her.

He lifted her hand into his, feeling her soft skin against his, she nuzzled her face closer to his chest sighing. Placing her hand gently in her lap he cupped her face, rubbing his thumb lightly against her cheek. Her eyes popped open, and she started slapping off his hand.

* * *

 **Rey**

She felt a tickle on her face, something was crawling on her cheek. She woke up and started to slap it off her face. She was in shock, Ren was holding her in his arms, watching her sleep. His mask was off and he was just watching her with those rich brown eyes. She scrambled to get off his lap wincing in pain from her injury. She was so embarrassed remembering she had thrown her arms around him like some common prostitute. "I am so sorry!" She felt the need to apologize, she didn't know what else to do.

She watched as he stood up, putting his hand up to make her stop. "There is nothing to apologize about Rey, you were overcome by emotions. You know more than anyone how I feel about emotions."

She wondered if he were just trying to be nice quickly dismissing that though. This was Ren, Dark Side user, a killer, a monster, but was he really? She was so confused about him, nothing he did made sense. The most complicated man in the galaxy seemed to be an understatement.

"Let's get you a shot and we will go home."

Home? That wasn't her home. She didn't want to fight though, she was tired and in pain. She wanted to curl up and sleep for days. A though of this being just a dream made her feel better, this is just a dream. I'm in Maz's castle in one of the rooms dreaming a three day long dream.

Three days! Was that all that had passed? She really wasn't sure, just a shot in the system, but it felt like it had been an eternity since she was saving BB8.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He sat in the war room going through battle plans for D'Qar with the higher ranking officers. He knew the only way he could capture the General was to go to the fight himself. He wasn't worried about the fight, he was worried about seeing her though. Would he be able to go through with it? He knew he needed something to push him to the dark side fully and her murder would definitely do it, but he was unsure he could. It would be his ultimate test.

His thoughts turned to Rey and the loneliness she felt, the want and need for a family. She was the lucky one, she had no real attachments to others. If Luke had gotten to her first he would have had the perfect Jedi, strong with the force and longing for acceptance from someone.

"Master Ren?"

He shifted his attention to the Major that called him, he vaguely recalled what he was saying about drawing them out and using a second attack to capture them.

"I will collect General Organa, she is our main objective in this strike. I need her alive."

"Yes Master Ren, we shall be prepared and on our way immediately." The Major responded

* * *

 **Rey**

She had been on the Finalizer for days now, Ren would be gone most of the day instructing her to meditate which she learned quickly she wasn't good at it. He had done his best to help her center her being, and feel the force in everything that surrounded her. Every time she tried her mind would start to wander, she would think about her friends, Jakku and if her family were there looking for her, but mostly her thoughts would turn to the perplexity that was Ren.

When they returned he had taken her to her quarters, which she learned were attached to his. She wasn't thrilled about that knowing he could march in her room any time he wanted but once she realized this was his ship to command he could do that anywhere he would have placed her. She admitted to herself it was a lot nicer than a cell or that dreaded interrogation table she had been strapped to. It had a bed, not overly big, a table in the corner where she could dine or study and her favorite thing in the room was a plant. It was as tall as here, the waxy leaves green and yellow, there were small white fragrant flowers scattered on its branches. Ren had told her it would help her meditate, she could use it to feel the flow of the force.

She looked at the door as it lifted and he strode in taking off his helmet as he walked to her. "I've got to go off ship, I will return as soon as I can."

She didn't understand why he would even tell her this, it wasn't like she hadn't ever been alone before. She noticed he had a lot on his mind, he was nervous. "Why?"

"I have to do what I can to keep Hux from killing a planet."

She bit the bottom of her lip, worry flooded her. He was going into battle, what if he didn't come back? Why would she care if he didn't come back other than he was the only thing keeping her from a death from the First Order. She watched him kneel in front of her, he lifted her chin to look into her eyes, the tickle where his gloved hand was on her skin. His brown eyes seemed to be pleading with her but she couldn't figure out what he was trying to tell her. Before she knew what he was going to do his lips were on hers, a gentle kiss, her stomach flipped from it, and she kissed him back. She could feel a need in his kiss but as soon as it started he pulled away. She wanted to pull him back to continue it, she didn't understand why, he was still a monster. He was going soon to kill more people, good people, people that she once was trying to help, trying to get the map to Luke Skywalker to. Why would she want to kiss this monster?

"Rey, I've instructed Captain Phasma to take you back to Jakku if I don't come back."

She was confused, she couldn't ever think that he could die. She had seen what he could do there is no way that anyone could kill him. The thought of going back to Jakku should have excited her, but this monster had been shown such compassion for her she didn't want his death to be the reason of her return. He couldn't die, there were too many questions that were left unanswered.

"Ren, do you feel the tickle?" She felt foolish asking, what if he didn't. What if it were the feelings of revolt just like when she would feel physically sick when he was near at times.

He smiled and sat down on the floor with her. "It's a force link. I suspect for some reason we've had one even before we met. I also suspect that the day I interrogated you we formed a bond. It's extremely rare, and little is understood about them."

She sat there thinking about what he had just told her. They had a bond? He knew about it but left her in the dark about the odd feeling it created. She felt annoyance creeping up inside her. She knew so little and he knew so much, but instead of him teaching her like he said he would he had been gone all the time telling her to meditate, to learn to feel the force. He was a horrible teacher!

"Rey, when was the first time you saw me?"

She didn't understand the question, it was in the forest. "The forest."

"Are you sure?"

She thought back before their first encounter, the call to the lightsaber. The fear she felt when she touched it, the horrible things she saw. She was going over it and remembered his unstable saber plunging through a man that was about to kill her. That was the first time she had seen Ren. She didn't want to tell him about it, the vision that still frightened her, that gave her more questions than answers. But wasn't that what he had been doing, or trying to do? Answer her questions.

"I found a saber, when I touched it…" She was still hesitant to tell him about what she saw.

"Let me see Rey, it won't hurt. If you think about what you saw I can see it." He said, there was an eagerness in his voice which made her weary. She remembered him in her head before, the pain of something that shouldn't have been there.

She nodded, she was nervous, remembering him coming after her with his saber, did she want him to see that? She felt his hand cupping her face, she leaned her head in his hand closing her eyes. She could feel her thoughts invaded but it was nothing like before, it was more of breeze flowing through her mind, a whisper that wasn't hers. She thought about being at the castle, hearing a child crying in a distance and following it down the stairs.


	15. Chapter 15

**Kylo Ren**

He smiled when she leaned her face into his palm, he entered her mind, it was so much easier now that she was letting him see. He did all he could to keep it painless for her. He saw into her mind, through her eyes.

She was at a bar watching someone walk away from her… FN-2817. There was a child crying, she had followed to down the stairs, a room with trinkets and trunks. A wooden box is calling to her, she opens the lid, a light saber. He knew that was his grandfathers, that saber should be with him! Not in some forsaken bar surrounded by the foulest rejects of the galaxy. He watched as she touched it giving her a vision. She was in a hallway, lights flickering around her, he knew whose breathing she heard. She started to run, fear, confusion. The hallway behind her started collapsing behind her, she was on the ground. She saw a cloaked man dropping to his knees in front of a large fire placing his mechanical hand on the droid, R2-D2. LUKE! Rain starts to fall, a soldier is standing over her, his blade in the air ready to come down on her. An angry red saber slices through the soldier. She sees him, and his knights standing in the rain surrounded by bodies. She is getting to her feet, fear flowing throughout her. The cold rain replaced by sunlight, she is on Jakku. Looking down she sees herself as a child crying for someone to come back, she was being held back by a large crolute. She looks up to the sky to see a ship flying away, everything becoming dark, the sun turning red. She is in a snowy forest, running away from what she doesn't know, she hears her name, a voice she doesn't know. He sees himself walk from behind a tree frightening her, she stumbles and the vision is over.

He felt her hand on his, still cupped to her face, tears streaming. "Do you know what any of it means?"

He didn't, he knew the players, but not the play. He knew that was the awakening he felt, it was hers, and it all came to from his grandfather's saber. He dropped his hand from her face, from hers. "No, I don't know, but we will find out."

He stood up to leave placing his helmet on he looked back at her. She looked so fragile sitting there, his light. "I will return Rey. I will inform someone to take you to the training room while I'm out. You've been locked up far too long."

He wasn't sure why he had allowed her to leave her quarters, he knew that she wasn't very good at meditating and with her being a scavenger he was sure she would be going stir crazy if soon if not already. Maybe it was because she trusted him with her vision, that with that trust given to him he would need to give a little back.

* * *

 **Rey**

She sat on her bed thinking about the vision she shared with him, he said he didn't understand it, but was he truthful. She didn't even get to ask if those visions were predictions of the future, but if that were so, why did it show her as a child?

She wondered if Ren were fighting right now. How was he going to save the planet? What exactly does a force bond mean? Would she have to live with it forever, or was there a way that it could be released. She would have to ask him if he came back. If he didn't she would go back to Jakku. Where her loved ones there right now looking for her?

The door lifting open she saw a storm trooper enter. "I've been ordered to take you to Master Ren's training room."

She couldn't believe it, this is what she disliked about Ren. He ordered this woman to take her to the training room, she didn't have a choice. The storm troopers were like slaves.

She got up and watched the trooper turn to leave. She didn't want to miss this opportunity to see if this woman or any other soldiers were like Fin.

"What's your name?" Rey asked trying to get a conversation started.

"EL-2923."

"Do they treat you well here?"

EL-2923 kept walking looking straight ahead "Yes."

"Do you remember your family?"

"The First Order is my family." She replied.

"No, your mother, your father?"

That question seemed to get somewhere with the trooper, she slowed her pace. "Ma'am, The First Order is my family. My birth mother was a spice user who did horrible things to me, I didn't know my father. If it weren't for the First Order I would probably be dead, or on spice just like her. Now please stop asking me questions, I don't want to get in trouble."

Rey felt a twinge of guilt, she didn't wish to get this woman in trouble. This soldier who was happy to be part of the First Order, she thought of Fin. Where most troopers like EL-2923? Could Fin have been a diamond in the rough? She missed her friend.

They arrived at the training room, she watched as EL-2923 chose a weapon, it was a baton of some sort, with two prongs at the end. Rey's eyes grew wide, she didn't realize that she would be fighting someone. She only fought when she needed to, when she felt threatened. "Are we going to fight?"

"Of course we are. I was told to bring you here and train you, this is how I will train you?" EL-2923 said humor in her voice.

"I don't want to fight you, there is no reason to."

She noticed that the trooper's shoulders rested. "I need to know where you need work to improve your skill. What is your weapon of choice?"

Rey thought about it and saw reasoning in it. "Staff."

She watched as EL-2923 grabbed a staff and tossed it to her which she caught. Suddenly the trooper swung at her, she parried the attack."

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

Once he landed he could feel their presence, both his mother and his father were here. He would be able to capture both of them. Then he felt something else. It was LUKE! The resistance had used the droid to find him.

He walked among the fighting, blasters from both sides being shot around him, he would use his saber to deflect any that actually might hit him. Watching from the middle of the battle he realized he needed to talk to Phasma about her training, especially their aim. Where they closing their eyes and pulling the trigger?

He ducked to enter a tunnel leading to an underground bunker. He knew he was going the right way he could feel them down there, he found them in a small room they dedicated for intelligence. There was nothing to it, everything was out dated. Apparently the republic didn't help them as much as the First Order though.

"Hello General."

She looked older than last time he saw her, she was tired, not the fighter he remembered. She had lost everything, her husband, her son, her brother, her title, and now the war. He was glad to see it. His mother, the woman that always thought she knew best knew what everyone needed, what secrets to keep.

"Ben…" He felt the emotion from her, saw it in her face. Her grief seeing her son standing before her. No! Not her son. Her son was dead, he needed to remind her of that.

"Ben is dead General."

"No, you just want him dead. Ben is in there, we know he is." Han said.

Kylo turned to his father, this was better than even in his imagination. The man who would leave months upon months, the man who would make his mother cry when she was alone. The man that couldn't even tell him the truth of who he was, what and where he came from.

"No Han, he is quite dead, there is no Ben anymore. Only Kylo Ren." He yelled. He knew at this moment he was only Kylo, there was no Ben. This was his chance to finally extinguish any light in him.

"Take off that helmet Ben, you aren't Vader." Han said holding his hand out like he was trying to talk down a snarling dog. It made him smile. He kept smiling when he unlatched his helmet and pulled it off dropping in to the floor. He saw tears well up in his mother's eyes when she saw his face. He remembered when he was older, and understood why his mother cried he would go into her room and let her know that she wasn't alone. But that was the past.

"Your right Han, I'm not Vader. I am stronger than Vader!" Kylo ignited his saber, he sliced through two of the resistance fighters that were in shock watching the exchange. He made it to Han, his father, he was glad that he would kill him without the mask, it made it more intimate.

"Ben don't." Han said, Kylo noticed he wasn't begging, at least not for his life. Han wasn't even fighting back. He felt Liea hang on his arm, she was begging. Pleading for him not to kill Han. He used the force and she slammed against the wall.

"You. You've made me stronger than Vader." He said venom dripping from his voice as he pushed his saber through Hans's chest. He watched as his father's life drained from his eyes, he disengaged his lightsaber, Han crumbling at his feet.

He saw his mother run to Han crying over his dead body and heard footsteps behind him, he knew it was his storm troopers. "Collect the General, we've gotten what we've come for."

He collected his helmet and walked out not even looking back at his mother. He needed to leave that room. Leave hearing her cry. He thought he would feel different after that, he didn't. If anything he felt weaker.

Walking toward his command ship he felt him, "What did you do Ben?"

He turned and saw Luke. His hair was greyer, he had a full beard, he was breathing hard. The last Jedi was old.

Kylo engaged his lightsaber, the hum and crackle gave him more confidence. He knew it was intimidating, just as he was. It was an extension of himself. He watched as Luke rush him, his green lightsaber humming, getting closer. He blocked Luke's attack, then another. He noticed that he had gotten sloppy with either his age or lack of use. Kylo felt the force expanding within him. The anger that his family had lied to him throughout his childhood. Adults were afraid of him, children his age thought him awkward. He was remembering when he was sent away to learn to be a Jedi with his uncle, he was always alone. He only had one friend and she was so much younger than him. She would always follow him, asking him questions, she was so sweet, so full of life, and curiosity. She made him laugh, she made him feel accepted no matter how different he was.

Her face flashed in his head, his recognition of the girl. Rey!

He stumbled backward tripping on a stone, he felt searing pain slash down his face and chest. Struggling to regain his composure he fought back, their sabers locked, Kylo used his guard and jabbed Luke in the shoulder, he saw his uncle grinding his teeth from the pain. He raised his foot to his uncles' chest and shoved him off.

He heard the tie fighters above him, shots fired towards Luke. He had been hit. There was nothing more for Luke to fight for, he saw his uncle on his knees, the Jedi Master was defeated.

"The last Jedi, and you will be the last uncle." Kylo said standing over his uncle.

"There is always a balance in the force Ben, you may kill me, I accept it, but remember there is always a balance."

He thought about what Luke said and remembered Rey, she was the balance as long as she didn't accept the dark side. He would teach her the way of the light, keep her soul pure as it always had been when she was a child following him around the academy. He smiled.

"There already is uncle." His saber slashing Luke's chest.

He reached down and took the saber out of his dead uncle's hand, clipping it to his belt, he walked back toward his command ship.


	16. Chapter 16

**Kylo Ren**

He guided his ship to the Finalizer, he should have felt different, felt something. All he felt was confused. This is what he was meant to do! Kill his father, kill the last Jedi, capture his Mother to collect any useful information, and use her to whatever means necessary. He was wondering if the First Order could even use her as a ransom for peace. It would be everything she had been fighting so hard for. Peace finally between the New Republic and First Order, all due to a Princess with no home.

Though would the New Republic agree? He was sure that some would, just because of who it was, what she was to people. His mother that had been a symbol of hope, a symbol of strength, she was loved. If Hux hadn't destroyed Hosnian Prime it would be so easy, and now he was hoping she was enough.

He felt his rage growing at Hux's ignorance, he knew that if he couldn't calm himself he would start slashing at his ship. He had to get his mind off of politics, Hux, his parents, and Luke… Luke, he had killed the last Jedi. Luke, the man that helped him become what he was today. Luke, the man who had Rey at the Jedi academy.

The fight with his uncle remembering the sadness of the awkwardness growing up it forced him to remember her. Even when he saw her vision he didn't associate it with the girl… Rey… but her name wasn't Rey. At the academy she was Raena… he was trying to reach the memories he had so long ago hidden. He had done everything he could think of trying to forget that night. He was so young, he didn't want to kill the younglings and the padawan that were his peers. He had no choice, if he hadn't he would have been killed with them, though he remembered there were some he enjoyed thrusting his saber through. Those young men and women who taunted him, who made him feel as if her were nothing. Then there was Rey, she was much younger than him, and at first she annoyed him when she would follow him around, asking questions that he would ignore.

He knew he needed to figure out who she was, he needed to let her know that he once knew her… but then he knew he would have to tell her what had happened, how he knew so much. He thought for a fleeting second that he could lie to her, but then thought better of it. He had been lied to all his life, he wasn't going to lie to her about hers.

* * *

 **Rey**

She enjoyed her training, EL-2923 hadn't held back, or maybe she did and she needed a lot more training, or just real training. All she knew was what came natural to her, what she did to keep people from stealing from her.

She was laying in her bed back in her quarters with Anakin's journal beside her. She had tried to read it again but it was difficult. She couldn't get her mind off Ren. During her sparing she had felt a sting across her face and dismissed it, but now she could think of nothing else.

Ren had told her about a bond they had. Would she really feel what he felt? And if so, was he injured? Was he… dead? She didn't want him to be dead.

She closed her eyes, felt her breathing, felt the soft fabric under her, the soft robe that was wrapped around her and thought of him. The boyish smile she had caught from him when he wasn't wearing that stupid mask. His voice, the smoothness of it, it would bring a chill to her. She remembered his lips upon hers. She placed her hands on her lower stomach, her fingers tickling right above the dark curls below the tie of her belt. She wondered what his skin would taste like, how soft his neck would be. She remembered the smell of the soap at the temple, her fingers traveled lower, between her delicate folds she found the nub that made her head spin when she touched it. She moved her other hand and started kneading her breast wondering what his hands would feel like, touching her so intimately. She slipped her finger lower and found the wet opening begging to be touched, gently slipping her finger inside herself and back out. She imagined it was his, her sped growing as she pictured him in her mind making her feel so wonderful. She plucked at her nipple wishing it was his teeth gently nipping at her, she slipped another finger inside of herself, she groaned his name. She imagined his lips at her breast, looking up at her, his brown eyes that she could get lost in looking at her with need. Her fingers trying to go deeper.

"Rey…" She heard her name beside her ear, felt the heat of his breath, felt his fingers and the tickle on her arm.

She quickly jumped off the bed, pulling the robe tight around her hiding as much of her embarrassment as she could. She was absolutely mortified, Oh stars! How long had he been there? How much had he seen? She ran to the refresher to hide in shame of being caught in such an act. She wasn't sure how she could ever face him again.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He had reached the Finalizer and felt the pull to the light, but this was a different pull, it was Rey, she was now his only pull to the light. He left his ship, not speaking to anyone on his way to her quarters. He just needed to be near her, look at her face, especially if he were able to make her smile.

He opened the door to her quarters and stopped in his tracks. Was she doing what he thought she was? He couldn't believe it! Her eyes were closed, her hand plucking at her small pink nipple that was exposed from her robe. Her legs bent and her fingers thrusting inside of her. He needed to go, he knew he did, but she was there, in nothing but a robe, pleasuring herself. Who was she thinking of, suddenly the traitors face flashed in his mind, jealousy filling him he started to walk towards the bed. She still hadn't noticed him, she was so lost in thought she hadn't heard him go over to the bed.

"Ren…" he heard her groan.

He forgot all about his jealousy, unlatching his helmet he set it quietly on the floor by the bed never taking his eyes off her. He knew that he shouldn't but he whispered in her ear, and lightly stroked her arm.

She immediately jumped out of the bed closing her robe around her body from his prying eyes. Her face turned bright red from embarrassment she ran to the refresher.

"Damn!" he said under his breath. He knew he should have left, but after what he saw, and then her saying his name he couldn't leave. He was shocked to see her like that in the first place and then her calling his name. Knowing he was the reason she was touching herself, it was more than he could stand. He was still hard from the experience.

He didn't know what he should do. The most feared man in the galaxy and here he was standing in his apprentices' quarters harder than farium, and at a loss what to do.

He had so much to tell her, he didn't want to tell her all of it, how could he tell her that he had killed his own father, his uncle, and taken his mother prisoner. How could he give the news that it was his fault she was dropped on a plant to have to take care of herself was because of him. She didn't know who she was, where she was from, and it was all his fault.

What will she think of me he wondered? She was such a good person but he couldn't forgive what he had done, not to his family, but to her. His pull to the light.

* * *

 **Rey**

She couldn't believe anyone had seen her like that, especially him! The monster saw her touching herself in the most intimate places! How could she ever face him again?

She stood in the shower, water running over her body. She was trying to wash her embarrassment away. She remembered looking at him, he didn't look shocked, nor embarrassed, but there was something different about him. His brown eyes like rich soil burning, his black hair was all chaotic around his handsome face. A gash! A red, inflamed gash across his face! He had been injured!

Her embarrassment quickly turned to worry. She got out of the shower, dried and dressed as quickly as she could.

Opening the refresher door she had seen he had left. She wanted to find him, make sure that he didn't have any more injuries. She went to the leave her quarters realizing she wouldn't be able to go anywhere. It was locked. It reminded her she was a prisoner in a cell, it was large and comfortable, but nonetheless, a cell.

She paced the room thinking of anyway she would be able to get the door open. She thought that she could do the same she did at the temple, when she first tried to escape, when he kissed her. Her stomach flipped at the memory. There was no way to do the same with this pad, it was much newer technology, there wasn't even a seam to get wedge it open, even if she had anything to wedge it open with.

She then though of what he said about the bond they shared and the pain she felt across her face earlier, she wondered if she could call to him through it. If he was full of it then it wouldn't hurt, if her were telling her the truth then at least she could try.

She sat in the middle of her bed, she closed her eyes and did as Maz had once told her to do. She felt the invisible force moving around her it felt like it made the air a little denser than when she wasn't meditating.

She felt the force reach out and picked up something. It was nervous, indecisive, alone, and in pain. She felt pain, it slashed against her face, and she knew that she had found him.

"Ren?" She called but only in her mind. "Are you there?"

She felt another emotion calling out to him… it seemed like surprise. Then there was nothing. There was no pain, no loneliness, it was gone.


	17. Chapter 17

**Kylo Ren**

He was sitting in private room at the medbay thinking about Rey's younger self as Reana trying to remember if she had ever talked about a family, where she had come from, anything that could give him an answer to who she was as a droid was applying bacta to his injury. He felt her, she was reaching out for him, it shocked him. He would have never thought she would reach out to him using the bond. He knew that he had to stop it, if she were to get in his mind he would see the murder of his father and Luke, the murder of so many at the academy. She thought he was a monster now, what would she think if she knew all he had done.

He finished at medbay going straight to her quarters. He wasn't sure how much he would tell her. He had no plans on lying to her, if she asked he would be truthful. He would tell her all he knew about her past, about her being at the academy with him. He just wished that he knew more than her following him around

He reached her quarters and dialed the code for the door to open. He saw her sitting on the bed reading the journal he had given her, how many times had she read it he wondered.

"Rey?"

She had already looked up when the door opened. "You're hurt."

"Yes, it doesn't matter. I need to talk to you." He realized that is why she reached out, she knew he was hurt, did she care enough to wonder how bad the injury was.

She set the book beside her and just stared at him.

"During the battle, I remembered something…" He was growing more unsure of himself, by the second. He had broken through a barrier with her, what if this would completely shut her down to him. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if she did. Everything he had done and the most terrifying thing was losing this beautiful scavenger, this ray of light.

"Take off that stupid mask and I may listen." She said with a small smirk.

He unlatched his helmet and placed it beside him watching her reaction to seeing him with the wound from jaw to his forehead. He noticed sadness on her face when she saw it. "Do not pity me."

Her face turned from sadness to defiance quickly, "Pity? Since when would you, Ren the Monster ever receive pity. I have no pity for you, I am still just your prisoner. I only get to come and go when I get permission from you and an armed escort. I look at your face and even before your injury and I get sick to my stomach. I remember the monster that took me against my will, took me from people who may have cared about me. You invaded my mind, hurt me physically and mentally. Then you take me to your Supreme Leader to be interrogated by him, I almost get shot returning! I stay locked up in a room of every minute of every day with nothing but a journal of a boy who was a slave that won his freedom, which makes me think of how I was a free woman who has become a slave!"

He listened to her rant towards him, watched as she came closer and closer to his face, the face he didn't want her to pity. She was pointing an accusing finger at him as she spoke. Everything she said was truth. He knew he should feel something by her words, but he couldn't. He couldn't change how everything happened, but since it had, since the bond, she was always in the back of his mind no matter what situation. Even in battle his thoughts turned to her. Watching her reprimand him he couldn't help but grin which he knew would irritate her mood even more. He wanted nothing more than silence her with his mouth on hers.

"Are you done?" He asked knowing that it would agitate her more. He liked when she became fiery, when she showed him her temper, she would be spectacular if she were to be lured to the dark side. To stand beside him, he knew that he would be great but with her… They could be unstoppable, especially since the last Jedi Master was gone.

* * *

 **Rey**

She crossed her arms and looked at the wall ignoring him.

"I will take that as a yes."

She looked at him just long enough to glare at him then returning her gaze at the wall. She knew he wanted to tell her something, that he remembered something but at the moment she didn't care. She reached out to him, he blocked her out. She wondered if he thought about what he had seen earlier, embarrassment crept back in, her face was unwavering but she could feel color coming to her cheeks.

He hadn't said anything for a few seconds and heard him sigh. It made her worried, had something happen to Fin? Han? Chewie? No she thought, he said something about remembering something.

"I remember the academy Rey, the Jedi academy." She looked at him and dropped her defenses, he looked like a hurt sad little boy. She preferred thinking of him as a monster, not this man who didn't seem to know what his next words were going to be.

"You were at the Jedi Academy?" She asked hoping he would continue, all her anger turned to curiosity.

He nodded, "And so were you."

She couldn't hide the shock. But how? She wasn't a Jedi, she was a scavenger from Jakku, though not from Jakku, she had been left on Jakku remembering her vision. She was left there by her family, the family who were coming back for her. The family that left a child in such a hostile environment, to have to take care of herself and never come back for her. Nobody was ever coming for her. She threw herself on the bed sobbing into the pillow. She had waited for so long for someone that didn't exist. She had dreamed that someone would come back and take her home. That for some reason she was left there but thought about every day and one day they would be back, she would no longer be alone. Those dreams were all shattered. Maz's words entered her mind, they are never coming back.

She felt him lay down beside her, his hand stroking her hair, him trying to sooth her made her cry harder. He rolled her over so she could cry into his chest while he held her.

"Rey, don't cry, it's tearing me apart."

He said it so softly she almost didn't hear him, she looked up at him, and his eyes were so gentle. He cared about her. She couldn't believe this monster cared about her. Throughout the galaxy her parents didn't care enough to come for her, on Jakku everyone was living for themselves, but here, held prisoner, this man who was so confusing cared.

Questions started flooding her, once she settled down from her recent breakdown.

"Do you know my family? Where I'm from?"

"No, I wish I did, but I plan to find out." He said still stroking her hair.

"How do you know it was me?"

"I remembered during battle." He said hesitating.

That is a funny place to have a memory like that. She didn't know what to say, she didn't know what to ask. All the meaningful questions had been asked, mainly if he knew where she was from, who she was from.

"What else do you remember?"


	18. Chapter 18

**Kylo Ren**

He was laying on his side, his head propped up with his arm, she was staring up at him, tears in her eyes making them sparkle brighter than any stars he had ever seen. He could see the wanting in her eyes, it wasn't the wanting he wanted but the need for answers.

"I remember when you first arrived, you were about 5 or 6, I was 13. You would follow me around, even when I would tell you to go play with the kids your own age. You were an absolute nuisance." He saw a small smile cross her face. "You told me that they were boring."

"You would follow me like a shadow, always asking what I was doing, always pestering me to teach you." It was his turn to smile, he was now her teacher, thought he hadn't really started yet.

He continued to tell her what he could remember about her childhood, what he knew of it anyway. He could see the sadness in her eyes, though she was smiling and he could tell she had so many questions.

"What happened? Why don't I remember any of this? Why did I grow up on Jakku and not at the academy?" She asked when he qrew silent.

These were the questions he knew that he would get but was dreading. Master of the Knights of Ren was anxious about telling her his horrid past. It was what had to be done. Snoke had told him that he couldn't live up to his destiny if it weren't. That his grandfather had done the same thing, he had to continue the path of his grandfather if he were to become as great as him.

He sighed, he wouldn't lie to her. "An apprentice turned against everything. He followed the darkness, it consumed him, it killed who he was. He killed himself destroying the academy that night."

* * *

 **Rey**

She listened to him talk, the stories. She would smile when he told her that she was a curious child always asking questions or that she was always at his side, or when she would try to defend him against the others.

She wished she could remember what Ren was like before. She thought of the apprentice who destroyed everything, destroyed her life and Ren's. She remembered that Han had told her about the apprentice and it was what drove Luke Skywalker into hiding.

"What was the apprentice's name?" She felt she needed to know who to hate, who took everything from her.

Ren didn't say anything, she had noticed that there were no emotions on his face, or in his eyes. She could have been looking at a droid with the lack of reaction.

"Ben Solo."

She couldn't believe it. It couldn't have been a relation to Han. Han was a hero! It had to be coincidence. "Surely not the son of Han Solo!"

"At one time, yes. Han Solo was his father, his mother… General Organa." He replied coldly.

She heard the venom in his voice. Him being with the First Order he would truly hate them since he considered them his enemy but she couldn't. She knew the resistance was fighting for what they believed in, she would do the same, hell she had done the same. She tried desperately to get BB8 to the resistance. It felt so long ago to her. That jubilation when Han had offered her a job.

They were still lying face to chest on the bed, she shifted herself up and placed a light kiss on his lips. His eyes grew wide. "What was that for?"

"It was a thank you." She wanted to make sure he knew she was grateful for sharing his memories since she didn't have any of her own.

The shock on his face was replaced with rage, he rolled off the bed and grabbed his helmet. His change in demeanor scared her. The monster was back. She sat up ready to run if she had to, watching him closely. She remembered the damage he could do to a desk when he was angry, flesh would be easier to damage than metal.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He couldn't believe she had kissed him! It was soft and didn't last but for a second or two. It left him confused. "Why did you do that?"

"It was a thank you." She said.

He was ashamed. He deserved her hate not gratitude. Of course she didn't know that he used to be Ben Solo, she still only knew him as Ren, not even Kylo Ren. She knew nothing about him, if she knew what he has done she wouldn't kiss him thank you, she would be trying to kill him. He could feel the anger rising.

I am Kylo Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren, apprentice to the Supreme Leader! The man who killed his own father, that killed the last Jedi and held his own mother prisoner, a man who shouldn't feel shame, who shouldn't hold this girl, this scavenger, in such high esteem.

He rolled of the bed and grabbed his helmet. He saw her fear of him, he could feel it, he was pleased with her reaction. He needed to remind both her and himself that he no longer had any light within him. Once his saber pierced his father and slashed through Luke he could never go back to the light.

"Do not thank me." He said as he put his helmet on walking to the door. He stopped before he left, "We start training tomorrow, rest… You will need it."

And he left.

He went to his quarters, he needed to know what he could do. He was hoping that answers would come tonight. He needed another vision from Vader, needed his guidance. He closed his eyes and touched the melted helmet.

There was nothing. Darth Vader was silent as he had been for years. He knew it was his destiny to join the dark side, his grandfather had shown it to him so many years ago.

When he first learned Snokes plans, and his dreams of what the First Order was to create for the galaxy he agreed. He knew the New Republic wouldn't do what was best for the ordinary population, they would live in luxury while their citizens would starve. They all wanted power for themselves, not for the good of anyone, but for feigned respect from others.

He needed to focus on his purpose.


	19. Chapter 19

**Rey**

It had been a week since he had told her about her past life and since then he had also changed towards her. He had collected her the next morning as he said he would for her training. He never took off his mask, his voice never showed any emotion. He had returned to the uncaring beast that took her.

They would meditate, spar, and he would teach her about the force, he would only speak to give instruction or ridicule. Today was no different. She was trying to meditate but she couldn't focus. Her mind would always return to the man who sat across from her and why the sudden change.

She peaked one eye at him, she didn't know if he was meditating or not, in that stupid mask he could just be watching her and she wouldn't know. She wondered if he wouldn't take it off because of the fierce injury across his face. She wouldn't have ever thought he would be that conceited but of course she didn't know anything about him which irked her. He knew more about her and her past than she did, and she knew nothing of him.

"Rey…"

She didn't realize that she had completely given up trying to meditate, she had slouched her back, she was staring at him, well his mask.

"What?" she said indifferently

"Isn't there something you should be doing other than day dreaming?"

She knew he was frustrated with her, he always was this time of their training, she could never clear her mind, there were always too many questions, and they mainly focused around him.

"I can't. There are so many questions that have no answers to." She told him hoping she would get some reaction from him, but there was nothing. He made no movement, she wasn't even sure if he were breathing. Still just a creature hiding behind a mask.

"You could take off that stupid mask, then maybe I could concentrate on what I should be doing other than wondering what you are doing behind it."

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He could feel her frustration, he could also feel her questions, the ones that he didn't want to answer. This past week were some of the hardest days he could remember having trying to show indifference towards her. He had opened up to this girl and once he did guilt tore at him due to the things he had done.

He never could meditate when she was around, he would just watch her hiding himself from her with his helmet. Though today was the first day she asked him to take off which he had no plans to do.

He smiled, it would be time to work on her weapon training. She had gotten better even in the week they had been working together. He had already come to the conclusion that he would take her to Ilum so she could start creating her saber. She had been used to using a staff on Jakku which would be fine but he had been teaching her how to use a lightsaber. The first couple days he had built two while she was training with EL-2923 using synth-crystal and today he would present her with hers.

"We spar then." He told her standing from his sitting position. He held out his hand to help her up which she slapped away, his smile grew bigger when she did.

He watched as she went to the wall and grabbed the staff she always used. "Put it back, you will not be using that today."

He took the two sabers from the drawer of the desk. They weren't special in any way, simple and quickly assembled handing her one of them keeping the other.

"We will train with these."

* * *

 **Rey**

She was shocked when she took the saber from him. It was simple, and had almost no weight to it. She engaged it and it sprang to life. The blade was red which she wasn't very pleased with but it wasn't as angry as Rens, It also didn't sound so violent, it was a gentle hum that was calming. She swung it a couple times getting a feel of it, it sung in the air as she did.

"Couldn't these kill one of us?"

"No, these are only used for training, granted you will know if you get hit." He stated as he twirled the blade.

She watched him and mimicked him, although not so well, she hit her knee with the blade. He was right, it did hurt, a lot. She heard him laugh behind his mask, she couldn't help but giggle a little from her clumsiness.

She hadn't heard him in any good spirits in a while, it made her feel more at ease with him. She wondered if he would wager their sparing today, it wouldn't hurt to try.

"I would like to propose a wager." She told him as she went into an offensive position.

"A wager?" She could hear the curiosity in his voice even behind the mask.

"If I land a blow, I can either ask a question, or demand something."

He stayed silent, was he thinking about it she wondered.

"And if I land a blow?" He asked her.

"The same, you can ask a question or demand something." She thought it was a good wager, she would definitely get more than he could out of it, he held all the cards, he knew more than she did about everything it seemed and she felt that he was hiding something from her. She wanted to know what it was. She also knew he was a far more skilled fighter than her.

"Agreed." He said suddenly attacking.

She barely had time to parry his attack, the two blades struck each other making a cracking sound that reverberated the room. Quickly his blade was out for her again, she had to step back to regain her balance as she parried. She tried to counter attack but it seemed like he knew what she would do, each time she would try to attack him he was quicker, and stronger. She needed to come up with a different plan, she needed to find a way to disengage his weapon, she struck at him, first high, then low. She kept this up for a few strikes that he blocked, high, low, high, low… low, the saber struck his calf.

She couldn't help but be elated at the blow, she smiled brightly. She knew what she wanted. She wanted a demand, she wanted him to get rid of that stupid mask, but even better, she wanted him to rid it always.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He saw a smile on her face, he could feel her jubilation on getting the hit on him. He didn't mind, if such a simple thing could make her light up so brightly he would let her. He would let her do most anything to see her so happy.

"My first demand," she said trying to catch her breath, "that you don't wear that stupid mask when it is just you and I."

He couldn't believe it, she could have demanded so much more that is why he was hesitant in making this wager. She could have demanded that she be returned to Jakku, or be set free at least. Instead her demands were so simple.

He released the latch to his helmet and lifted it off. It had been while since she had seen his face. The gash had been healing but very slowly since he had only gone to the medbay once for the injury. It was dark red, half of his face was still blueish yellow from the bruising. He knew that it would scar horribly, it would be a jagged reminder of the day he killed Luke Skywalker and his father. It was something he didn't wish to forget.

He noticed that she just looked at him, there was no pity in her eyes, she didn't want to comfort him, she just wanted to face him, not the creature in a mask as she once called him.

Before he realized what she was doing she was attacking again, he dropped his helmet to the ground and parried the attack. A smile across his face, they continued.

They spared for close to an hour, neither of them landing a hit. She was tiring quickly, he was going easy on her. He had even let her get the hit on him. She deserved at least that with the way he had treated her lately.

"We are done." He told her, he knew she needed to eat something and regain her focus and strength. He ordered a droid to bring them some food and led her to the desk at the other side of the room.

They sat in silence, him leaning back in the chair his arms behind his head, eyes closed. He knew she was watching him but she said nothing.


	20. Chapter 20

**Rey**

She was glad he stopped the sparing, she was out of breath and her muscles were screaming at her, not to mention the shot she had given herself earlier to kill the pain in her collar was wearing off. She wished that it didn't bother her anymore but it did, especially when she was extremely physical.

She watched him as he leaned back in the chair, his hands resting behind his head, eyes closed. He looked like he should be outside beside a lake with the sun on his face, not inside a training room surrounded by weapons and metal walls. She also knew that he was taking it easy on her during their sparing. This man who had killed hundreds of people, thousands even, wasn't even using half of his skills on her.

"How many people have you murdered?" She asked.

He didn't look at her, or even open his eyes to regard her question, he just shrugged his shoulders. She couldn't believe his nonchalant gesture towards her question. He had killed people! Fathers, mothers, brothers and sisters, torn people's lives apart and he just shrugs! She was growing angry looking at him, she almost wished he was wearing his mask again so she could see the monster instead of the man.

"How can you be so uncaring Ren?" She asked him not even trying to hide the anger in her voice. "You've torn families apart and you don't care!"

She watched as he leaned forward, his elbows on the table, his hands resting under his chin. "You don't think that we have lost thousands in the First Order?" his voice was cold. "You think that all these people that surround you, the soldiers, technicians even down to the sanitation workers on this ship do not have loved ones? Lovers? Family?"

She was shocked, she had never thought of that, she thought of storm troopers as brainwashed slaves not realizing that once off duty they may have had other lives.

"Even EL-2923 has a husband. There are families on this ship Rey, children, mothers, fathers. This isn't just a war ship, this is a city of people and other sentient who live, work, and believe it or not love."

Her eyes dropped to the table, she was ashamed of her accusations.

He continued his voice still cold, "Do you know that the children in their classes are taught evacuation routes to escape pods if we ever come under attack? They worry about their families, and their parents worry about them."

His fist pounded on the table which made her jump, she looked at him and saw the anger on his face but once their eyes met she didn't see anger, she saw sorrow. His face softened when he saw the tears gathering in her eyes.

"Rey, I'm not telling you this to make you miserable, you assume too much but you know very little about the First Order. If you hadn't come across the resistance first and told how horrible the First Order is supposed to be then maybe you could understand what we are trying to fight for, what I'm trying to fight for."

She knew he was right, but it was so confusing. How could both sides be right? How could both sides think the other was so horrible that the other needed to be destroyed? If what he was saying what so true then why would he need the dark side so much. Was he lying to her about all of it? He hadn't done so before that she was aware. He even told her about her childhood before Jakku. Why would he do that?

"Then why do you use the Dark Side Ren?"

"I have more power with the dark side, with more power we have a better chance of winning this war."

She didn't hear any deception in his voice or see it in his eyes. She was torn, she wasn't sure of who was right and who was wrong. On Jakku all she had to worry about was finding anything worth value so she wouldn't starve.

The door opened to the room and a droid rolled in carrying a tray of food for them setting it on the table and left.

She took a piece of bread and fruit she quickly ate it, licking the juices that dripped down her fingers and hands.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He didn't mean to get angry at her assuming, it just made him conclude she didn't know as much of the First Order as she should. He knew that she deserved to know everything, even about him, but he couldn't stand the fact that if she learned about him she would come to hate him. That tore at his heart more than anything ever.

He watched her eat, she still ate as a scavenger would quickly and not knowing when she would eat again. He watched as she licked the juices from her fingers wondering what her tongue would feel like on his skin. He could feel himself get hard just with the single though knowing he needed to push it out of his mind. He hadn't been with a woman since he had captured her, and since his meeting with Rey didn't want to be with just any woman, he wanted to be with her, to feel her body under his. He thought of the day when he caught her masturbating, her strong yet feminine body reacting to her fingers calling his name as she touched herself, her fingers plunging as deep as they could. He wondered how sweet it would be if it were his fingers stroking insider her, how she would taste if he were able to lick the folds between her thighs. He could feel his cock throbbing with need thinking about her under him, her begging him to be inside her.

The door to the training room opened interrupting his thoughts and a knight strode in. He knew it was Alask Ren before a word was spoken. He was annoyed at the intrusion of his mind playing out such a wonderful dream. He wouldn't dare get up to reveal his state to either of them.

"Kylo Ren." The knight said bowing deeply, "I've come to congratulate you!"

"Alask, welcome." He nodded his head to his knight, his motion that the man should rise. He looked quickly to Rey and back to his brother, luckly Alask seemed to understand he needed to keep quiet of his congratulations. "Please join us, eat."

Kylo watched as Alask pulled up a chair removing his helmet that looked much like his own.

* * *

 **Rey**

"Kylo Ren, I've come to congratulate you." The newcomer said bowing.

Kylo? She hadn't even known his actual name. She had just assumed his name was just Ren. She felt a bit embarrassed remembering there conversation earlier and her assumptions.

She looked at the man, he was wearing all black, just as Kylo and but his mask was different. It lacked any definition, just a slit where he could see out of. He wore a cloak around him. He wasn't as tall as Kylo nor was he as slender.

"Alask, welcome." She heard Kylo say, she was still enthralled by the visitor, she wasn't sure if she should worry or not. Surly Kylo wouldn't let any harm come to her, him seeing her as his apprentice. "Please, join us, eat."

She watched as the knight took a chair sliding it to the desk and removed his helmet setting it to the side of the desk.

He wasn't handsome, nor was he ugly. He looked to be a few years older than herself, in his mid-20's. His hair was cut short, nothing like Kylo's unruly locks, and was a dirty blonde. His eyes were blue like the sky and she could see amusement in them when he looked at her.

"I am Alask Ren, follower and brother of Master Ren." He introduced himself. His voice wasn't as deep without the helmet. She noticed his smile, it was sweet, and playful.

She didn't know what to do, she didn't know what to say, her eyes darted to Kylo looking for direction from him. He was looking at Alask, no emotion on his face, but there rarely was, but she could see that there was fire in his eyes. Did he not like this man?

"This is my apprentice Rey." Kylo said saving her, she released a breath that she wasn't even aware she was holding. "She is off limits Alask."

She looked at him quizzically, what did that mean? Did this man think she was a prostitute? She felt the heat rise to her cheeks at such a notion.

"It is a true pleasure in meeting you Rey." Alask said, his smile never leaving his face and seemed to get bigger as he took her hand gently placing a kiss on it.

She pulled her hand out of his. She didn't want to be here, she felt the air around her getting thick. Apparently these two didn't like each other, she could feel anger radiating from Kylo. She knew what happened to innocent furniture when he was extremely angry.

"Rey, I need a word with our guest. Please use a training droid until I return once you have finished your meal." He said, she could tell he was trying to keep his composure. She nodded as they stood to leave, she watched them go into the small viewing room the door closing behind them.

She could see them through the window, it was tinted but she could tell the two apart Kylo being taller than the younger knight. She couldn't hear them nor tell their facial expressions. Knowing she would drive herself crazy wondering what they were talking about she stood to program the training droid. She collected her saber to deflect the blasts that were soon to come her way. She watched the droid waiting. It shot, she tried to deflect it but was late, it hit her in the arm. A few seconds later another blast and another miss. She was getting aggravated at the droid, there was no telling when it would fire upon her though she did have the speed set to slow. It would move around the room making her change direction with it, another blast, and another miss. "Ugggh, I hate you droid." It beeped at her. "Yes, well I still hate you." she responded, it fired again, and again she missed, this time it shot her collar, she felt pain tear through her collar and shoulder.

"Focus Rey, feel the force, feel the air that the blast cuts through." Kylo said.

Now she not only felt frustration but also embarrassment at the two watching in her failure. She tried to focus with them watching, tried to do as Kylo instructed but when she saw the blast she was to late, she had missed again.

She noticed Kylo walking towards her, he came behind her, put his hands on hers, she could feel the tingle from his touch, her back was against his chest. She could feel the electricity when he leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Close your eyes Rey. Feel everything around you, feel the air how it is motionless."

She did as he said closing her eyes. She felt everything around her, but mostly him, the tickle of his breath in her ear, the tingle of his hands wrapped around hers. She couldn't concentrate on anything but his nearness, then she felt it, something new, something quick. It was coming at her piercing through the air at her, she moved her blade towards the intrusion and saw the blast hit the droid.

She had done it! With her eyes closed, she squealed in excitement jumping up and down, she turned around and wrapped her arms around his chest hugging Kylo.


	21. Chapter 21

**Kylo Ren**

He let her make all the motions and she had done it. She started to jump up and down squealing with the excitement of it, before he knew what was happening her arms wrapped around him. He wrapped his arms around her small frame resting his chin on the top of her head. He looked straight at Alask who was smiling at the sight. He didn't smile in return. He saw his knight wink at him, collect his helmet and leave through the viewing room.

She pulled away from him, her excitement still in her voice "Did you see that Kylo? I did it! Even with my eyes closed and I did it! I felt it in the air and blocked it!"

He smiled down at her, "you did."

She turned around to where she last saw the other knight, "Alask! Did you…"

She turned back toward him "Where did Alask go?"

He didn't like that she was wondering about his knight his smile fading, "He had to go back to his ship."

He noticed she was still smiling, still proud of her accomplishment. He could feel it from her, he knew she had a long way to go, but there was no way he would tell her that right now. He had been indifferent to her for long enough.

Suddenly he felt a sting hit his leg, it was a blast from the training droid. Rey's laughter filled the training room, he looked at her his eyebrow raised, which made her laugh even harder. He didn't mind, she was his light in the dark galaxy. Reaching out the droid flew into his hands and he shut it off.

"It hurts Kylo." She said laughing holding her stomach, "Oh stars it hurts."

He lifted her chin to look at him, he couldn't figure out what could hurt. Was it her collar, he knew it wasn't healed yet. She had stopped laughing and was looking into his eyes. He was mesmerized by them, the gold flecks that littered the greens and browns. She was truly beautiful, this desert flower. He wanted nothing more to kiss her, to feel her lips on his. He had just gotten a step further, and if he did reach out to her with a kiss he would be going 5 steps back.

He kept his hand under her chin and wrapped his arm around her back. She didn't look away from him he noticed. She didn't look scared of him, her eyes were questioning, her mouth was slightly open, he couldn't stop himself, lowering his lips to hers he kissed her. He was waiting for her to push away to stop it, but instead she responded by reciprocating the kiss. He was gentle with her, he didn't want to frighten her, he used his tongue to open her mouth a bit, he noticed that she hesitated but then she opened up for him. It was all he needed lifting her off the ground her feet dangling she wrapped her arms around his neck, he took her to the desk setting her on it. Their kiss never breaking, her tongue was now exploring his mouth. Her hands were running through his hair at the nape of his neck, her nails dragged against his skin on his neck. He broke the kiss looking at her, she opened her eyes and he saw lust, she wanted him as bad as he wanted her. She may not know it, but he could see it. He pulled her closer to him, he kissed her jaw trailing kisses down her neck and back up to her ear. He nipped her earlobe and felt her tremble from it. He couldn't help but smile to himself. He felt her lips on his neck, she was exploring his as he was her, he felt her tongue trail down his neck, he couldn't help it, he couldn't stop his body from trembling himself.

His mouth back on hers he gently laid her down on the desk, one arm still wrapped around her, the other holding himself over her. He looked at her, she was flushed from everything that was happening. His cock was hard against the fabric of his pants, he wanted this woman more than anything, he may never get another chance to be with her though he highly doubted that, he was being selfish thinking that way. He wasn't even really sure if she had been with anyone before, if she hadn't he couldn't take her innocence like this, in a training room on top of a desk, but he didn't want to stop touching her, kissing her, tasting her skin. He started kissing her neck again, he could feel her pressing against his bulge, it drove him mad. He groaned into her ear as she was grinding against him. She seemed like she knew what she was doing to make his lust soar. Her arms were wrapped around him, trying to get him to get closer to him, she was breathing faster and harder. He had to know.

"Rey, have you ever been with a man before?" He whispered in her ear. He knew, all her muscles tensed beneath him. He knew she didn't even know what she was doing, she was lost in it all, she was still a virgin.

* * *

 **Rey**

She couldn't stop herself, his lips on hers was like nothing she had ever experienced before, the taste of him, sweet and warm, she opened her mouth for his tongue, her stomach started to flip but she didn't feel sick like before, it was the same flip but there was no illness. He lifted her off the ground, she felt if she didn't hold on to him she would fall into a dark void. She felt the desk under her, his mouth moved down along her neck and to her hear, her body shook from the pleasure of it. She felt a throbbing below her waist, she wanted to know what his skin tasted like so she kissed his neck, to his ear, then using the tip of her tongue leaving a trail down his neck. She felt him tremble from the action. It made her lower regions throb even more. Her body was begging for something, she wasn't sure exactly what but she didn't want what was happening to stop.

She felt herself being lowered to the desk, he had laid her down as his lips were on hers. She felt as her body were screaming at her for a release. His lips back on her neck, she raised her lower half closer to him, she felt something hard, it felt so wonderful pressed against her, it relieved some of the screaming from her body. She ground herself against him, her arms around him. She needed him closer, his closeness. She heard him groan, her breath was growing heavier.

"Rey? Have you ever been with a man before?" He asked in her ear between kisses and nips.

His words broke the spell she was under. She dashed back to reality and was in the process of lovemaking. Her body stiffened under him. She was so embarrassed that she had no control over her body. She turned her head from him coving her face from the humiliation she felt. She wanted to run away, go into her quarters and be alone.

She felt him as he lifted off of her, she sat up and wouldn't look at him. She could feel him watching her, she could feel the awkwardness in the room, the awkwardness she created by acting like a common whore.

"Rey?"

She didn't look at him, she didn't even want to speak to him, she just wanted to hide from him.

"Damn it Rey!"

She jumped at the sound of his voice, she looked at him, he stood there with his helmet in his hand, her face still flushed from a mixture of embarrassment and desire.

"You will not feel guilty about your feelings, nor for anything your body wants." He said forcefully.

She stared at him, did he just say that? To her? He had actually rendered her speechless. She didn't know what to say to recant his words. She still just wanted to get away from him.

"I want to go back to my quarters now." She said quietly, she saw him nod and put his helmet on.

She got off the desk and followed him down the hall. As she walked she tried not to think of her jezebel ways. She noticed how the ship's crew would give Kylo plenty of room when passing. They were afraid of him, she knew they were but it never amazed her. She was still embarrassed from the scene that had passed but she couldn't help but smile wondering what they would think if they had seen what had happened not very long ago in the training room.

They turned a corner and she noticed 4 storm troopers coming toward them, there were civilians behind them, looked like 6 in total, each having another trooper beside each one, blasters aimed, and four more troopers following them. Her heart sank remembering when she was escorted as a true prisoner. The first prisoner was an older woman, her long hair braided down her back, her chin held high, she was very beautiful even in age though she looked tired. As she passed she looked at Rey and it looked as if she smiled at her? She stopped and turned around watching hoping that the older woman would look back but she didn't. She watched as all the prisoners walked by her, then the storm troopers. She felt his hand on her shoulder, he was looking down at her and she looking at him. He turned and kept towards her quarters, she followed.

She noticed that he walked right past her door to which she stopped at. She cleared her throat and he stopped and just turned his head towards her direction.

"You've gone past my cell." She stated pointing to the door.

"You will join me in my quarters, we've matters to discuss."

She couldn't believe it, there was no way she was going to join him in his quarters. The feelings that he stirred her body into earlier there was no way she would give him the opportunity to try again. She crossed her arms and held her ground that she wouldn't go into his quarters. She just wanted to shower and try to forget the day.

Standing there defiant, watching him turn around and with only a couple strides of his long legs he was toe to toe with her. Her chin raised showing him that she was serious and unwilling to go with him. Before she knew it she was in his arms being draped over his shoulder.

She started kicking and hitting his back, "Put me down right now or else!" She screamed, he turned and continued to his door, she tried to shimmy herself off his shoulder in which he heaved her back up causing her to lose her breath.

Luckily they didn't have far to go since their quarters were so close and he was opening the doors. He strode her in towards the bed, depositing her on it none to gently.

She recovered quickly wiping her hair from her face refusing to look at him. She couldn't believe he did that to her.

She had seen him unlatching his helmet and setting it on the table in front of the couch he sat down. She watched him, he didn't even look at her. She wasn't going to break his thought, maybe if he forgot she was there she wouldn't have to talk to him. She was angry at this man for so many reasons, and him throwing her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes just added to the list of things to dislike about Kylo Ren.


	22. Chapter 22

_**A/N: I realized that I had made a mistake updating this chapter, I had uploaded 23 instead of 22. So I have decided to combine the two. I hope this mistake doesn't make you want to stop reading my work. I have enjoyed writing this story so far and I hope everyone reading it has enjoyed it as well. Thank you everyone that has reviewed, favorited and subscribed to There is no Grey.**_

 **Kylo Ren**

He sat on the couch, he hadn't seen that woman since he had taken her prisoner and there should have been no reason to see her today. Where he hell were they taking the prisoners? Were they being transported? And if so where?

He pulled out his com. "Captain Phasma."

"Master Ren?" he heard through the com.

"Where are the prisoners being taken?"

"Sir, they are being transported from cells to interrogation, ordered by General Hux."

He cleared the channel. He knew there was no reason for them to be transported through Officers quarters to the interrogation. Hux was trying to play games with him, he must have found out who he once was. If it was a game Hux wanted, it would be a game he would get.

He slammed his hand down on the metal table, leaving a dent in it from the force, he could feel blood filling his glove. He relished in the pain, it made him stronger.

He shouldn't have brought her with him, after seeing General Organa he knew he should have let her go to her own quarters. He didn't want to be alone but he didn't wish to be around anyone else either.

He pulled his glove off, his hand wasn't broken but it had been cut, he watched as blood dripped steadily from his hand to the floor. It was a sweet release for him to watch the life force trickle from his body, he was hypnotized by it.

He felt her leave the bed before he even saw her beside him. He could always feel her no matter where she was, even when he was on D'Qar he still felt her. He watched as she tore the bottom of her shirt, she took his hand and wrapped it with the torn fabric. He looked at her as she knelt beside him, his hand still in hers. She didn't say anything which he was grateful for, she just sat with him in silence.

They sat that way for about ten minutes, she had rested her head on his arm trying to console him, he could feel her through the bond, her calming aura she shared with him, her concern. He had brought her here because he did want to talk to her, to let her know that he would never do anything she didn't want to do which he thought was ridiculous because he knew all she wanted in the world was go to Jakku and wait for the family that didn't exists to come back for her. He was pretty sure she was an orphan, he never remembered her telling him about her family as a child, though he still wanted to find out, if nothing more than for her sake.

"Rey." He said breaking the silence. "We will be leaving the ship tomorrow." He hadn't planned on taking her to Ilum so soon but he wanted to do something that would make her smile, a smile like she had earlier when she deflected the blaster beam.

She raised her head from his arm and placed her chin on it looking up at him. She didn't say anything, she didn't have to, he knew the questions she had without her even opening her mouth.

"We will be going to Ilum, I wish for you to find your Kyber Crystal so you may make your own lightsaber." He saw her perk up with that revelation a small smile crossed her face. He could feel her excitement.

"Don't get excited yet desert flower, it's very cold and I don't think you will like it as much as you think you will." He told her smiling. He noticed that her demeanor changed, was she afraid of the cold.

He watched as she stood up and moved to the table.

"Why did you call me that Kylo?"

 **Rey**

She was excited she was going to visit a new world and build a lightsaber. She loved to work on things, take them apart, rebuild them, she was good at it.

"Don't get excited desert flower, it's very cold and I don't think you will like it as much as you think you will."

She lost some of her excitement being called desert flower, there are no flowers in the desert, and she was far from a flower.

"Why did you call me that Kylo?"

She stood up and went to the table waiting for his answer. She watched him as his shoulders slumped, he looked defeated.

"It's just a term of endearment Rey."

She noticed he wouldn't even look at her.

"I've grown to care about you, even before I remembered our past, I cared for you then as well. I went to Luke to ask if he would grant permission for you to become my padawan when you became of age. He refused, he said that it wouldn't be good for either of us. I pleaded with him and he still refused. I took you under my wing once I got used to your irritating me every step I took."

She thought about what he was saying, he had always cared about her, he was her friend and family when she was alone once. He wanted to teach her, just as when he met her again he told her she needed a teacher. It made her wonder.

"When you took me from Takoanda, did you know I was the same girl from the academy?"

She watched him as he shook his head no. "I felt a link that you and I shared, but I truly had no idea. I had forgotten you honestly. I tried to forget everything but my training from that place."

She was thinking about what he was telling her, chewing on her bottom lip deep in thought. His voice breaking it.

"I saw you in the forest and I didn't remember you, but I was enthralled by you. I knew you were more than what I could find from the surface of your mind, I could feel it through our link. When I felt the tingle between the two of us I knew I would need any reason to take you with me, when I had seen the droid had shown you the map it was the perfect excuse. I needed to know more about you, I needed to know why we were linked."

He still wouldn't look at her, was he ashamed? Ashamed of her and his feelings?

"I went into your mind and felt all your sadness and how you had always been alone your life I felt you as a kindred spirit. I could tell you were a force sensitive and when you went into my mind I knew that you were very powerful, untrained, but powerful. Knowing that power I wanted to train you, that is when I took you to Snoke, I knew that he would have me kill you if I didn't, if he couldn't' see for himself. He is right though, it is my compassion for you that makes me weak Rey. But I could never kill you, I could never hurt you."

She watched him as he spoke but didn't know what to say to it. She watched him, he was still looking at the floor the silence in the room was overwhelming. She wasn't sure if she were to say anything.

"That journal you read all the time, Anakin Skywalker's…" She heard him say nervously. "I know how he feels, to be a man that loves a woman so much that he would do anything for to protect her."

She couldn't believe it, she wasn't even sure she had heard him right. Did he just announce that he loved her? If he had made her speechless earlier she really didn't know what to say now. This man who claimed his loyalty to the dark side just claimed that he loved her.

Did she even know what love feels like? Would she know if she were to fall in love? She noticed he had finally looked at her, she hadn't even noticed she was so lost in thought.

"Kylo Ren…" She started to say, but she didn't know what to say. She bit her bottom lip trying to think of something to say, anything to say. She didn't know if she loved him or not, she could tell she cared about him remembering when she saw he had been injured she worried about him. She knew that he could make her body betray her brain, but was it betraying her heart as well?

"Rey, you don't have to tell me you have the same feelings, I didn't tell you this to hear that from you. I just needed you to know. If you would like I will take you back to your quarters."

She could feel the sadness that surrounded him, she also knew how much it took for him to tell her of his feelings. She surprised herself, she didn't want to go back, not yet at least. She wanted to stay.

"Could you order some food for us, I believe I would like to dine here with you if that's okay."

 **Kylo Ren**

She was always full of surprises. He was sure she would want to run from the uncomfortable position he had put her in but she had just asked to eat with him.

He stood to give a dinner order to the droid at the door, he turned and saw that she was pacing the floor deep in thought. She was biting her bottom lip, a simple thing that was so sensual. He walked to the refresher letting her think, he knew he had given her enough to think about for a lifetime. He took the makeshift bandage off his hand and placed the wound under the running water to clean it. He watched the water mix with the blood, it wasn't as deep as he thought and had quit bleeding. He knew she was behind him watching him he could feel her confusion. He had let her know everything he felt for her, he knew she didn't feel the same way about him, or if she did she didn't realize it. She told him that she felt sick around him once, but he knew it wasn't illness she felt. He knew more about her feelings for him than she did, but she would have to come to her own conclusions for herself. She still didn't know the horrible things he had done either. He would have to tell her all of it one day but once he did he knew she would see the monster he could be, the monster she used to see.

"Kylo?"

He turned and saw she tears in her eyes, he wanted to hold her, to comfort her but he didn't, not after telling everything he did.

"Thank you for letting me know how you feel, and although I don't know how I feel about you, or any of this. I don't remember anything about the past. All I can remember is being a scavenger, being alone, being hungry. Then a little BB8 came rolling into my life flipping it upside down. Then there was you, a monster who isn't really a monster at all but a man who hides behind a mask."

She noticed he was about to say something but held up her hand to stop him, if he were to say anything she may not be able to finish her thoughts.

"I do know that I care about you Kylo Ren, the man behind the mask, but I'm not even sure what love is. How can I know my feelings when I don't know what those feelings are?"

She felt better letting him know her thoughts of the matter, and she was glad she didn't see any hurt in his eyes. He truly was the most confusing man in the universe.

She turned from him noticing that the droid had returned with his order, there was enough food for 3 days, meats, fruits and vegetables. She took the tray from the droid and placed it on the table. It smelled amazing and if she learned nothing else as a scavenger it was to eat when there was food.

She watched the droid leave as she sat and filled her plate with a little of everything. She realized she was hungry, picking up the meat with her fingers and shoving it in her already full mouth. She noticed he had sat down, he was smirking. "Wha?" She asked with her mouth full.

His smile got bigger, "Our next training exercise should be table etiquette." He said, humor in his voice.

She wasn't offended by his words, not after what he had just disclosed. "Hahaha." She said mockingly.

She watched him as he put a plate in front of him, taking a fork and knife from the tray he used it to pick up a slice of meat and set it on his plate. She watched him wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, he raised his eyebrow at her. She realized he was serious!

She sighed and took a knife and fork from the tray watching how he cut the meat into bite size pieces she tried to copy him. He was still smiling at her watching her struggle with cutting the meat. She couldn't believe it, she could take apart a starship destroyer but she couldn't cut a piece of meat. She was frustrated and still hungry, she stabbed the larger portion of meat and took bites from it held up by her fork smiling at him.

She watched him get up and go to a hidden panel on the wall, he pulled out a bottle of liquid and two glasses, she watched him pop the cork in the bottle and pour the dark red liquid into the glass.

"What is it?"

"Cedrellian aged wine." He replied handing her the glass.

She eyed it, she remembered when men would get drunk on Jakku and either become bumbling idiots, or violent idiots.

"A glass isn't going to hurt you Rey."

She took the glass and smelled it, it smelled like it had gone bad. She made a face so he would know her thoughts.

"Just try it." He said with a sigh.

She smelled it again, still not sure if wanted to try it. She put the glass to her lips and took a small sip. It was delicious! She drank the whole glass. It was warm down her throat and tasted like a bitter fruit.

She smiled at him and held out her glass hoping he would put more in it this time. "You were right Kylo, it's delicious."

He shook his head and smiled at her, "I don't think so, you'll get drunk."

"I won't get drunk, may I please have another glass?" She knew it took much more than two glasses to get a person drunk.

"I will let you know that I will not hold your hair if you lose your dinner." He said as he poured more wine in her glass.

She watched him, she enjoyed when he smiled, he looked like a boy that didn't have a care in the system. She sat and watched him eat, she would take a bit here and there but she had eaten her fill. She sat there sipping on her drink wondering more about this man in front of her. She had questions, like how he was sure he loved her. And to be truthful with herself she just wanted to listen to him talk, his voice was soothing.

"What were your parents like?" She wanted to know what it was like to have a family, she wanted to know about his.

 **Kylo Ren**

With all the questions in the galaxy she had to ask about his family. He wanted to shut down the conversation. He could tell her about his feelings about her but was having trouble to talk about them. The ones that lied to him, pushed him away, and made him was he was, not that he had a problem of who he was. He was on the right side of the war.

"There isn't anything to say, I had a mother, I had a father." He said, he watched her reaction and noticed her disappointment in his answer.

He sighed, "Fine, bring the bottle with you." He said getting up and walking to the couch. If he were going to discuss them maybe he could do it better with alcohol in his system.

She sat down beside the arm facing towards him with her legs crossed. He couldn't help but smile, she was like a kid sometimes. She poured some wine in both their glasses and waited.

"My mother was in the senate, my father was…" How could he explain Han Solo without explaining Han Solo, someone that she admired, someone that he resented? "Let's just say he was an explorer and entrepreneur. She was always busy, and he was always gone."

"If your father was never around and your mother was always busy then were you always alone?" She asked.

"I spent a lot of time with a very annoying know it all Droid called See-Threepio."

He saw her smiling at him. "So you were raised by a droid, lived in and around the senate never needed or wanting anything in your life, and had a father that went off exploring the galaxy?" She drank down her glass, pouring more in her glass. "You aren't a monster, you're just spoiled."

She had done it, she had gotten under his skin with those words, a part of him wanted to tell her everything, another part knew if he did he would lose her forever. It was forever his life, always being torn apart by one thing or another.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Forgive my mistake, but if you have previously read chapter 22 before 2.9.17 I made a booboo and left out a chapter. If you wish to read it in it's entirety, it is up and in it's entirety. If not, lets get wasted with Rey. :) I would also like to thank everyone who has made it this far, reviewed, favorited, and or subscribed, and hope that you continue to enjoy my own rendition of Kylo Ren and Rey.**

* * *

 **Rey**

She had noticed how angry he had become, she realized what she had said, and felt guilty about her careless words. She didn't know what it was like to have a family, a mother and father. She wasn't sure what was worse, to have them but them never being around, always being too busy for her, or how she lived without any at all. She realized that they both had been abandoned in one way or another.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." She wanted the silence to stop, she enjoyed when he smiled, but he had drawn inward again.

"Maybe you are right, my family is a bit complicated. Always has been. My mother always busy with politics, my father busy with who knows what he did. I didn't belong in either of their worlds, nor did I belong in my uncles. I didn't feel like I belonged anywhere until Snoke."

She watched him, she wasn't even sure he was talking to her anymore, it was more like he was just talking to talk. She didn't say anything, she was learning more about him this way.

"Snoke took me in. I felt accepted, he told me the truth about where I'm from, who I am. What my family was trying to hide from me. It wasn't they didn't care about me, hell, they loved me, and I loved them, but they were frightened of me. They were frightened of what I could become and what I have become. They do not understand the First Order, they see it as the Empire and the Sith before that. They didn't understand, she doesn't understand the unity it stands for. All they know is the resistance, the Republic and now the New Republic which is no different than the other. People starve under the New Republic, they die needlessly, and they are bought and sold as slaves and nothing is done for them. The forgotten majority."

She was taking everything he said in about his life. This was as much as she knew about him. She knew what he could be, but now she was learning what he was for. Why he was fighting for the First Order, why he followed Snoke.

"What did they lie to you about?" She was almost shy to ask, what if he didn't tell her what if he shut her out again?

"I've done a lot of terrible things to become what I am, to fight in a war on the side I think is right. Things that if I told you, you would know I'm the monster you think I am." He said cutting his eyes at her.

She didn't want him to stop talking, she wanted to know who he was, she needed to know who he was, what he was talking about. She sat there, holding her glass afraid if she were to move it would break his conversation.

"You've lived your life not knowing anything about your past, and in my opinion you are the luckier person for it. You had no one to disappoint. My mother sent me to my uncle because she was afraid of me. She was afraid of the darkness she saw in me. She knows the force, she is force sensitive herself."

She noticed how sad his voice sounded, she could hear pain of rejection. "Is your father sensitive to the force as well?" she asked quietly not even sure he would answer.

He shook his head no. "I don't think he had a sensitive bone in his body, force or otherwise. His forte was always getting in trouble and a smooth talk to get himself back out."

"Yeah, I know a man like that." She smiled thinking about Han getting boarded by the two gangs trying to talk his way out of his predicament. She noticed he had looked at her and his scowl became darker. She sighed, surprisingly enough she wasn't uncomfortable at his glare, nor the situation. She was curious and he was finally answering questions, very vague answers, but answers none the less.

"How did you know Han?" She asked, she knew he knew him at some point from when she was interrogated by him.

He didn't answer, he sat with his elbows on his knees staring at the ground.

She sighed, she was afraid that was all she was going to get from him, at least on a more personal level. She poured herself more wine taking a sip trying get everything he had told her realizing he never answered her question of what he was lied about. She could tell he was in a dark place wondering if this was what his parents saw in him, what his uncle saw in him that scared them so much.

They were both lost in their own thoughts.

"Rey?"

She jumped between her thoughts and their silence she wasn't expecting hearing her name.

"If you were to find your family, what wouldn't you forgive them of?"

Such an odd question she thought. One she didn't have an answer for. "Well, to have a family, someone to love and love in return? I don't know. I guess…" She really didn't have an answer, she didn't really understand the question. She felt that she would forgive them for almost anything, they had dumped her to take care of herself on Jakku, she had been waiting for so long for them. If they were to come back for her, to be a family she could forgive anything, even leaving her there. "I've already forgiven them for everything if they had just come back."

She felt tears fill her eyes, she wasn't sure why she still cried for a family she had never had. How long does it take for forget people you never knew?

"You could forgive the people that abandoned you?"

She took another drink, her head feeling a little light. "Yes, I believe I could, if they loved me I could. I have forgiven them, and always dreamed of them coming back for me." She smiled thinking of all the times she would lay in her AT-AT dreaming of when they would come collect her. There would be hugs and tears in the reuniting of family, the emptiness that she had felt so long filled with love.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He watched her, she was now smiling thinking of a family she didn't know. He watched when she stood up pacing the room lost in thought just smiling.

"I would dream that one day they would find me, and my father would lift me off the ground like I was a toddler and spin me around." She held out her arms spinning, eyes closed, wine splashing from her glass to the floor. She stopped spinning and wrapped her arms around herself. "Then he would give me the biggest hug I've ever had… the only hug I've ever had." She was still hugging herself. Was she lost in her dreams?

He went to her taking her glass and placing it on the table. He wrapped his arms around her, he smiled when he felt her arms around him hugging him in return. Everything seemed to melt away with her, the Resistance, The New Republic, the war, Snoke. It was just them, his pull to the light never felt so wonderful.

He felt her pull away just enough to look up at him, he could get lost in her eyes, he could get lost in her. "You forgot to lift me and spin me around Mr. Monster."

He couldn't let that invitation go and he did just that, he grabbed her by her waist and spun her around. She started laughing yelling at him to put her down, kicking her feet. He gently placed her feet back on the ground. He knew the room was spinning on her between the wine and their child like behavior.

"I'm a bit dizzy." She was trying to get her footing right so she didn't fall in the spinning room. He picked her up into his arms, smiling at her, he always seemed to have to carry her for some reason or another. He felt her playing with his hair at the nape of his neck.

"You know Kylo, it isn't fair that your hair is so much nicer than mine."

He could feel the tickle from her fingertips on his neck. He needed to get her to her room and away from her before she started something he wouldn't want to stop.

"Where are you taking me?" She was looking around confused.

"I'm taking you to your room. You are drunk and need to sleep it off."

She reached out her arms stretching her back almost making him off balance. "But I'm not tired! I want to do something! Anything! OH! Is there something broken that I can fix? Other than your walls."

He hit the button on the wall and it opened leading to her quarters. The smile left her face. "So our rooms are really joined huh?"

He wasn't going to answer he was going to just put her in bed and go, there was no reason for him to tempt himself with her intoxication. He laid her gently on the bed, she sat up and grabbed his hand.

"Don't go Kylo, I don't want to be alone just yet."

Her eyes were pleading with him, he couldn't leave her when she looked at him like that.

"You could just talk to me, about anything, until I fall asleep."

He smiled, "Am I that boring?"

She giggled "The most boring man in the Galaxy I would say."


	24. Chapter 24

**Rey**

Her head woke her up from her sleep, covering her eyes she rolled over feeling a body beside hers, she froze. Opening one eye she saw he was clothed and let out a sigh of relief. She tried to slowly leave the bed so she wouldn't wake him. She remembered the night before and groaned as she sat on the side of her bed. She remembered acting like a silly girl spinning, then him spinning her around his quarters. Smiling to herself she remembered him talking to her until she fell asleep. At times he had been charming. She looked at him behind her, he was still sleeping, his arms behind his head, his leg hanging from the side of the bed. He looked far from a monster.

"It isn't polite to stare Rey." He said smirking.

She turned her head away from him which was a mistake, it felt like an axe went through her skull. She wasn't sure it was possible but her brain seemed to be pounding at her ears trying to escape it hurt so badly.

"I wasn't staring." Was all she could seem to mutter, but even that hurt.

She felt the bed when he got up, her face in her hands wishing she could crawl under a rock until the pain subsided. "Oh Stars, why do people drink? How do they get over the pain?"

She saw his boots in front of her and looked up, he was holding a glass of wine in one hand and a pill in the other. She couldn't believe he was offering her wine, she already felt like she had been stampeded by a herd of nerf. "You've got to be kidding me, I'm never touching that stuff again."

She heard him laugh. "Trust me, you just need this and some hair of the dog."

Trust him? Why would she trust him, it was his fault any of this was happening, but other than the obvious of being a prisoner, albeit a well taken care of prisoner, she didn't have true freedom. Though when did he ever lie to her? Or maybe they were all lies, thinking so much wasn't helping her head ache. "I don't want hair of the dog. It sounds disgusting."

"It's an expression, to get rid of the ailment you have some hair of the dog that bit you." He said with a smile pushing the glass and pill towards her again.

She would do about anything to help at this point. She grabbed the pill, popping it her mouth and downing it with the glass of wine and fell back in the bed pulling the pillow over her head.

"I'll be back in an hour, dress warm."

She lifted the pillow and looked at him in shock. "You can't be serious! We are still going?" She couldn't even fathom traveling with how she felt, her head was still throbbing, she didn't want to move let alone go on a ship.

"An hour." He said as he walked through the hidden panel from his room to hers.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He stood in the large chamber waiting for Snoke to appear through the Hologram, the First Order had gained much needed ground with the capture of Leia Organa, without the resistance the New Republic was lost without her and there were no Jedi to protect them.

He watched at Snoke appeared before him, "Master."

"Ah Kylo Ren, my strongest of apprentices. We have all but won the war because of your actions. What information have you retained from the prisoners?"

"I have not interrogated them Master, I would never get anything from her using my normal interrogation techniques." He knew that his master could see through his very thin excuses. He didn't want to see her, he didn't want to be reminded of killing his father, or his uncle. Even when she was begging for Han's life he could see she still loved what she thought was her son, he couldn't look at her and her see him for what is has become.

Snoke resting his arm on his throne, his fingers rubbing his chin as if he were stroking a beard that wasn't there, he was studying him. He stood making no moves under his master's scrutiny. "How is your apprentice coming along?"

"She is learning, she has trouble with patience, but she will learn. She does well with weapons."

"Keep teaching her the way of the force, but I warn you Kylo Ren, do not let her become your newest weakness. You have slain Han Solo, and the Jedi Skywalker, let's hope you will not have to slay your own student." He said waving him away.

Kylo nodded and left. Snoke's words heavy on his mind. He could never kill Rey, he would rather die first. She had become his weakness and Snoke knew. He always knew.

* * *

 **Rey**

She sat in the back of Kylo's shuttle, her headache all but gone. She was getting excited about going to Ilum, seeing a new world, and getting off the massive ship.

She watched as he piloted the craft with ease, he was back in full monster mode wearing the mask, quiet, but he seemed to be comfortable at the controls. She told him that his father was a traveler, explorer, was it his father that taught him to pilot? She didn't think many in power like his would.

She was getting anxious with only her thoughts, she wanted to finally get there, and the silence between them made minutes feel like hours. Getting up she walked behind him and looked at all the controls. She noticed that even the weapons controls were his to control. It was a beautiful piece of technology, beautiful and deadly, just like him.

"Can I fly?" She said, she wished he wasn't wearing his mask, she would have loved to see his face. He didn't say anything, didn't even look at her.

She was getting restless and he wouldn't even amuse her. She knew that he didn't even have to pilot right now, he was just ignoring her. "How much longer?" She asked.

"Soon."

"Ugggh!" She said as she started pacing. She had to do something! He hadn't said hardly anything since he collected her to be on their way. She wondered if she had done something wrong, she wondered why she even cared if she had. He told her that she would get drunk if she kept it up last night, but the wine tasted so good, and it made her feel even better. She wondered if he thought less of her because she did have a little too much. She replayed it all and yes, she did get a bit silly, but nothing that he could get to mad about. She should have been upset at him if anything, him sleeping in her bed with her. He could have done anything to her while she slept due to the alcohol, she knew he didn't. Everything she had learned about him which was still very little he didn't seem to be a man that would do anything to her she didn't want done.

She thought of the training room and the passion they had shared, did she want that to happen? Her mind was telling her no, but her body and even her heart was saying yes. Her cheeks started to warm thinking about it. It was just yesterday, but every day seemed so long. Was it even yesterday though? She didn't know day from night anymore, it wasn't like there was a day and night on the ship. She slept when she was tired, ate when she was hungry and trained when she was awake. It was so different than her past.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He couldn't get Snoke's words from playing in his mind. He knew that he needed to stop thinking about it, he was sending his feelings to Rey, she hadn't stopped fidgeting since they got on the ship. The sooner they got to Ilum the better. She would be able to get away from him and become herself again without his influence.

He kept hearing her walking back and forth behind him, not only was Snoke's warnings bearing on his nerves so was her pacing. He closed his eyes behind the mask, he had to meditate. He sat trying to focus, but it was useless, he was growing even more agitated. He had bring calm to both of them before he destroyed his ship. He decided to try something different, he reached out to her through the bond, he could feel her heartbeat, his calmed and they seemed to beat in unison. He felt her chest softly rising and falling with each breath she took, his matched hers. He could feel her behind him, he felt her hand rest on her shoulder. He couldn't feel her anxiousness, and his nerves had calmed.

"You should see it soon. The side we are going to will be completely white from the snow. It will be cold." He knew they were both better due to the bond, whatever he had done worked.

"What's the side we aren't going to like?"

"Unfortunately it's not as pretty. It has been mined almost to the core." He didn't like what the Empire had done to the holy site but there was nothing that could change it. "It is violent and hot due to the lava from the core."

They had been traveling for a couple of hours and he had just felt the engines go from hyper-drive to sub-light drive, they were almost there.

* * *

 **Rey**

She was in awe of everything as they landed, everything was white, the ground looked so soft. Flakes falling around the ship from the sky. Even the rocks that jutting from the snow was pure white. She heard him power down the ship excitement bubbling around her she rushed to the ramp so she could feel the fresh air on her face, to feel the snow and find out if it was as soft as she thought it would be.

She felt Kylo wrap the cloak he brought for her around her. It was a light tan and lined with soft white fur, it tickled her skin around her face. She watched him as he wrapped a thick black cloak around himself lifting the hood. She saw he was still wearing that stupid mask.

He opened the ramp for her and a blast of frigid wind hit her in the face. It felt like a million needles stinging her skin. She didn't know what cold was until now. Turning away from the wind she hid her face in his chest. "Okay, let's go to the lava side. I think I would rather burn to death than freeze to death."

She could hear his laugh, feel his chest move from it. She peeked up and smiled at him. "Let's go."

She followed him trying to hide her face from the wind, staying as close to him as she could using him as a human shield. They had been walking for at least 15 minutes, her fingers were getting numb, her teeth were chattering, she tried to clench her jaw to stop but even that wouldn't make it quit.

"Are we almost there?" She asked to his back but got no answer. She wasn't even sure he could hear her from the wind. It sounded like the planet was alive and in terrible pain. She thought about what Kylo had told her about the mining that had taken place on the other side of the planet, she wished that some of the warmth could find itself to their side.

Kylo stopped in front of double doors, she wasn't expecting to be there, she was so close to him she couldn't' see anything in front of her and she walked into him.

He pushed one of the doors open and led her in first. It was cold in the room but nothing like outside. She was breathing in her hands to try to get feeling back in her fingers. She was looking around the room, it was cut from inside a mountain, large icicles hung from the roof, everything was ice. She saw what looked like a frozen waterfall towards the back of the room.

She felt his hands on hers, she wanted to pull away until she felt the warmth of them. He had taken off his mask and she could see the concern in his face.

"On the way back I'm wearing the mask and gloves."

He smiled "Only if I can use you as a shield."

She pulled her hands from his rolling her eyes at him but smiling.

"Where do I start?" She looked around but didn't find an entrance. She vaguely remembered him telling her that she would go down through a cavern and a crystal would call her.

"Well, when you are ready I will break the waterfall and you'll go in. But I need to warn you about somethings before you go. I want you to be prepared to what could happen."

He led her to a rock that was in the middle of the room and gestured for her to sit, which she did, he knelt beside her.

"First, it's a labyrinth, you need to pay attention to where you are, and where you've been."

She understood, it would be like exploring the forgotten battleships on Jakku, though she was sure it would be easier to find her way out of the battleships than underground.

"You may also see things, hear them when you are down there. These caverns will play upon your fears, your weaknesses, just remember it isn't real."

She started to worry, she had enough insecurities that it wouldn't be hard to use them against her. She tried to hide her nervousness from him but she started shaking, and not because of the cold. She felt his hand cup her cheek, felt the tingle from his touch.

"If it becomes too much remember I'll be right here, you know how to reach out for me, call out to me and I will find you Rey."

She just nodded, she had reached out to him when he was injured and he had shut her out.


	25. Chapter 25

**Kylo Ren**

He felt her fears, but he couldn't let her go in there without knowing. That's what Luke had done to him, he didn't know about the things he would see, how it played with his mind.

He stood and held out his hand for her. "Ready?"

She nodded and took his hand, he felt the electric pulse from her hand to his. He wrapped his arm around her, she was so small compared to him. He held out his other hand feeling the force swirl around him focusing on shattering the wall of ice. It shattered towards them, he stopped the ice shards in the air so it wouldn't hit them. He felt her bury her face on his side to protect herself, he couldn't stop the smile the crossed his face. She looked for him for protection, it showed she was starting to trust him.

He let the ice fall to the ground and led her to the entrance. She was still shaking, he didn't know what to do for her, she had to do this herself, he wouldn't be able to help her other than projecting confidence through their bond, he was just hoping it was enough. He handed her a lamp to help with the darkness, and kissed the top of her head and let go of her.

* * *

 **Rey**

She looked into the dark opening, thankful for the lamp he had given her and the kiss. It wasn't anything special, nothing like they had shared before, it was more like a kiss for good luck. Turning on lamp she started down the caverns.

The walls were white and wet, nothing looked spectacular, she could hear water dripping from the ceiling somewhere in the darkness. She came to a fork, not knowing which way to go, closing her eyes she tried to feel everything around her, feel the movement in the air, tried to feel the force.

"Go away Reana go bother the other kids." It was a tiny whisper, she couldn't tell where it came from.

"Hello?" She called out, only her echo answered back.

She felt a slight wind against her face, she followed it going to the left of the fork. She kept walking further and further down, she was afraid that she would get lost so she stayed straight.

A small child crossed her path down another entrance, "Hey!" She said following it.

What would a kid be doing down here? Then she remembered what Kylo had told her, but she wasn't afraid like he said she would be. She saw a figure ahead of her lifting the lamp trying to get a better look at it.

She saw the child, it was a girl with three buns down the back of her head. It was her!

"Come on, let's go play with Ben." The girl said running in another part of the cavern. She had to duck to get through the small pass. She entered into a large open area, she didn't see where her younger self had gone. She noticed a light from the rocks on the wall. It was bright and getting brighter the closer she got. She gently picked it out of the rock and the glow dimed. It was so small in her hand, it wasn't what she had expected, it was cool to the touch and clear.

"Come on Ben is waiting." The girl had said behind her, she turned and watched her younger self run behind a rock. She followed, the rock had been hiding another tunnel through the cavern, she lifted the lamp trying to keep up.

She had lost her, "Where are you?"

She saw a shadow turning through a different path, it was lit brightly. Young Rey was standing beside another crystal. "Take it, it's yours." She had said pointing at the crystal, "take it then we can play with Ben."

Rey reached out to take the crystal, once she touched it she saw a boy, he was standing with his back towards her. Black hair cut short, dark grey pants and a grey shirt and vest, he was looking off the side of a cliff.

"Hello?" She called out.

"Go away Reana. Go play with the kids your age." The boy said not turning around.

She saw her younger self run past her stand behind the boy. "Ben Solo! You know I can't stand them."

The boy turned around, but it wasn't a boy, the grey clothing turned black. It was a monster in a mask. It was Kylo Ren. She noticed that they were no longer outside, the blue sky had turned into a dark chamber, dark grey walls slightly tinted red. A large ray of light shining through the opening of a domed roof. Kylo walking towards her, she was stepping back, he engaged his lightsaber baring down on her, she tripped and fell to the floor as he raised his saber, she covered her face with her arm so she wouldn't see her death coming, but there was no blow.

She was still in the caverns, it wasn't real. None of it was real. She tried to think of what Kylo had told her about the caverns playing tricks on you, using your insecurities. She held the crystals tight in her hand her mind playing back what had just happened. Ben Solo becoming Kylo Ren, and Kylo Ren trying to kill her. She remembered everything he had told her, _'_ _I remember you Rey. You would follow me like a shadow.'_ _'_ _And Han Solo, you feel like he's the father you never had…. He would have disappointed you.'_

Ben was Han's son, Kylo Ren was Ben. She didn't want to believe it, but it was so clear. He had lied to her! From the very beginning he had lied to her.

She remembered when he told her about the Jedi academy and how Ben Solo had destroyed it. It was Kylo Ren, he was the apprentice that had ruined her life.

Her chest was so tight, it felt as if someone were ripping out her heart, tears falling from her eyes from the pain and anger she felt. This whole time he had lied to her, but what did she expect she thought. He is a beast, a creature in a mask, why would he be honest.

She couldn't believe how foolish she had been. She wanted nothing more than to find him and confront him but she didn't know where she was. Oh Stars! She was lost. He told her to pay attention to where she was, where she had been. She looked around trying to retrace her steps, there were no clues left, no foot prints to follow back. She groaned and went left.

She had been walking for what felt like was hours, she still hadn't found the room that she had to duck to enter. She was lost, thoroughly, but there was no way she would call out through the bond to him. Behind her fear of being lost she was still furious at him. She wanted nothing more than find a new way out and steal his ship leaving him on this forsaken ice planet. She kept walking trying to find anything that looked familiar. She felt as if she was going farther and farther in the cave. She wanted to give up.

She felt stir in the air, she knew it was him, it made her even angrier. How dare he try to find her, especially through their bond. The first thing she wanted to do once she finds herself out of these caves she would find a way to severe it. She didn't want to be connected to him, she didn't want to feel his emotions, or him to feel hers.

"Rey?" She heard him call through the bond, she felt his concern. It made her even angrier, she wanted to scream, she wanted to fight, she wanted him to feel the betrayal she was feeling. She was hoping he felt the anger and betrayal from the bond.

"No, Ben Solo. You have no right to call out to me."

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He was starting to get worried, she had been gone for hours now. He had used the time to meditate in the sacred area, though it did him no good, he was no longer Jedi, he no longer used the light side of the force. If anything him being in the caverns for so long had weakened his abilities. He could feel her anger, her desperation, he felt the pain in her chest. He could only account it to the likes of heartbreak. He wondered what the caverns were showing her for all those emotions to run through her all at once. He wondered what lies it told her?

He had remembered when he had come to gather his Kyber crystal. He would hear whispers of doubts in his head, how he would never amount to Luke Skywalker, how he shouldn't even be considered a Skywalker. Though he would hear those doubts throughout his life, in his mind and from others at the academy.

He reached out to her, he had to know that she was okay, and that he was still here if she were to need him. "Rey?"

"No Ben Solo, you have no right to call out to me."

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIT!"

He stood up and started pacing, making a fist, releasing it, repeating the movement trying to control himself. He didn't want her to find out this way, he didn't really want her to find out at all. She seemed to be coming around with him being Kylo Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren, part of the First Order, dark side user of the force, but now… Now she knew he was once Ben Solo, she knew his father, and knew of his mother. She knew of all the destruction, he had caused, and the cause of her life as she once knew it shattered and forgotten.

He had to find her, to try to explain, but he didn't know how to explain it. He had defeated himself, all for what? All for people not having to worry about when the next time they would eat, for people to have self worth, or even be given basic medical needs, and the final end of slavery. So people that worked hard earned what they received instead of working hard and everything going to an owner. He knew what he had done was right, what was needed to be done. She may be his pull to the light that he didn't want gone, and terrible things had happened, but it was still War.

He wanted to break something due to the frustration of it all but instead opted to go look for her. They would need to leave before this side of the planet became shrouded by night. He didn't want to be stuck there, especially in the state of mind they were both in.

He tried to reach out but there was nothing through the bond, he couldn't even feel her emotions anymore. She was blocking him, and doing very well at it. He walked farther in the cavern, lighting his saber for light he had hoped that he had a lamp instead. As well as his saber did for him in battle it was loud, it would be harder from him to hear her.

He came to a fork in the cavern, he remembered it during the gathering, he had gone right before, but he didn't know which way she would have went. He saw something in the corner of his eye to the left, but before he could tell what it was it disappeared.

Extinguishing his saber he stood in the dark looking for any sign of Rey's lamp, listening for footsteps. There was nothing but darkness and silence. He reached out for her again, this time he felt a small tug in his chest towards the left of the cave, his saber back on he followed it.

* * *

 **Rey**

She could feel him reaching out to her and did all she could to block him. He ruined her life to become what he was now. Would she be a Jedi right now if Ben Solo hadn't killed them all. Why didn't she receive the same fate as all the other children? She had so many questions that she would never get answered.

She sat down leaning against the stone wall of the cave, and examined the two crystals she was holding. The smaller of the two had a yellow tint, the other clear. She was trying to get him out of her mind, she didn't want anything to do with him and that included think about him. She was still lost but preferred it that way than have to see Kylo Ren.

Her body was tired, but her mind kept racing. He had said he loved her, but how can a monster love? How could she have even worried over him, she should have known better. She wondered if she had been so craved for people in her life that she tried to see a hint of goodness in him since she had so little in her life. It was all his fault.

She heard a low hum, she knew it was him, he had come into the caverns looking for her. She couldn't tell where the sound was coming from, everything echoed, she just knew she wanted to get away. She got up and started to hurry further down the depths of the cavern, she found a path to the right and took it. She stopped and listened, she couldn't hear the hum anymore.

"Why are you running?"

It was her younger self again, she knelt down looking at herself, she thought it was so awkward to be talking to herself this way. She thought she maybe going mad. "I'm hiding from a very bad man."

"There are no bad men here, just us and Ben."

"No, Ben is the bad man. He may have been good once, but he isn't Ben anymore. He has gone to the dark side." She was getting annoyed with herself. "Why am I talking to you? You aren't even real."

She sat down and put her face in her knees, she started to cry. She was cold, she wanted to be back at Jakku, something that was real, it was hard, but it was her life. She knew what to expect. She wished she hadn't ever saved the little lost droid, she should have let Teedo take him for parts.

"Are you done sulking?"

She snapped her head up wiping away the tears. Young Rey was standing in front of her with her arms folded. He always said that to her. "Go away, you aren't real." She wanted to be left alone, she knew she was but it seemed so real. She hid her face in her knees again, she just wanted to fade away, to not feel anything anymore. She was tired of being angry, the confusion, and the uncertainty.


	26. Chapter 26

**Kylo Ren**

He had found her, she had gone deeper than he had ever been. He watched her, she was talking to herself. She was sitting on the ground hiding her face, he could tell she was crying. He knew he would only make it worse if he let her know he was there hiding in the darkness, but he also knew if they didn't leave now they wouldn't leave any time soon. They wouldn't be able to go out once night fell, they would die before they could get to the ship.

"Rey."

He saw her jump and hold out her lamp trying to find where he was, he walked out of the darkness that was hiding him, her face setting in anger when she saw him.

"What do you want?" She crossed her legs and crossed her arms. If looks could kill he would definitely be on a funeral pyre.

"If you don't wish to sleep here tonight we need to go." She wanted to kill him more than ever before. He didn't know how to act towards her, now that she knew what he had done. He wondered if somehow she found out that he had also murdered Han and Luke. He almost hoped she did learn about it, then she would know just how sinister he could be when he had to be.

"You can go all you want. I don't want to go anywhere with you." She said turning her back to him.

"Rey, you can be angry at me all you like, just do it on the ship. I do not wish to be stranded here all night."

He was getting frustrated with her, he had been gone far to long and there was no telling what Hux was doing in his absence. He had no com and wouldn't until they got back to the ship. He could always make her sleep though he hoped it didn't come to that.

"Damn it Rey! Don't make me do something I may regret!" He shouted, it echoed throughout the empty cavern walls.

He noticed that had gotten a reaction, her spine straightened and she slowly raised from sitting, turning towards him. "I've got a bad feeling about this." He said quietly to himself.

"Something you may regret? Oh! Kylo Ren, the Monster of the Knights of Ren may do something he might regret?"

Her eyes were puffy from crying, and they were bright blue with golden flakes, she stood in front of him looking up. Anger radiated from her small frame.

"I'm sure if there was a man somewhere in there he would be full of regrets, regrets of his past, what he did to those children, snuffing their lives from them before they even had a chance to live. If there were a man somewhere in there he wouldn't have devastated his family and so many other families. Yes, there are casualties in war, and you had chosen a side, but they weren't your enemy. They were children! You killed them in cold blood! You ruin everything! You ruined their lives, you ruined your life, and you ruined mine. You weren't satisfied with anything, you didn't have enough, you caused destruction to gain what? Power? And what has that power gotten you? It's not respect. You have only gained fear through it. If that is what it's like to have the force, then I want nothing to do with it."

He watched as she opened her hand and two crystals fell from it to the ground, and walked past him. She was partially right he thought. He killed children, future Jedi who would grow one day and ruin everything he was trying accomplish. If he hadn't more would have died, more innocent people caught in a crossfire of war.

He reached down to pick up the two crystals she had dropped. They felt uncomfortable in his hand, he put them in a pocket to keep them safe. He turned to follow her, he could see the light up ahead from her lamp but he was sure to keep his distance, if she went the wrong way, well he figured he would cross that bridge when they got there.

* * *

 **Rey**

She didn't know where she was going, she just wanted to get away from him. She had felt a little better after telling him partially what she thought of him. She felt so lost, and not because of her literally being lost. She didn't know how to behave anymore, she was beginning the think he wasn't what she had thought at the beginning, that maybe he wasn't a horrible person he just had different ways of thinking, but no, she realized he was a horrible person.

"Rey." He had said behind her.

She stopped, she didn't even realize he was following her, she didn't look back at him, she just stopped.

"We turn here."

His voice was quiet, flat, there was no inflection in it. He was cold again which now she preferred. She wondered what else he had lied to her about, but deep down she didn't want to know.

"I told you, if you want to leave you can go without me. I don't want anything to do with you."

"You will die, and I won't let that happen. If you stay then I stay as well."

She felt the anger bubbling back up, she wanted nothing to do with him, and he knew it, but he wouldn't leave her be. She wanted to be alone, it was what she knew best. Though she knew that he was just as stubborn as her, and he had a lot more patience than she did. If she were going to be alone it wouldn't be here. He would never take her back to Jakku, she was his prisoner. He may call it being an apprentice, but she was a slave. She could come and go when he said she could, she could only do what he said. She was no longer a free person.

She walked back to him and gestured that he go and she would follow.

She watched his back following him through the passageways. She wondered why she was following a beast, beasts couldn't be trusted. He couldn't be trusted. He was dark, inside and out, yet he always was gentle and patient with her. Was he just curious about her because she possessed the force, because they had a force bond? That was something she couldn't deny, it was irritating.

Neither of them spoke, they had been walking forever and the longer they were walking the colder it was getting. She pulled her cloak tighter around her to trap the warmth. They must have been getting closer to the surface, but even then she didn't remember it being as cold as it was now. She thought about what he had said, if the sun had set they wouldn't be able to leave, she was hoping that she wouldn't be trapped with him but she was afraid they wouldn't leave. She was starting to consider the risk of freezing to death.

She noticed the fork from the beginning of the caves, hoping they weren't to late, hoping they could escape, she could escape to her own warm quarters on the ship, at least then she wouldn't have to tolerate his presence.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

Everything was wrong, none of this should have happened. He shouldn't have taken her, he should have left her and captured the droid. She would have gone back to Jakku to and waited forever for her family. Maybe she would have met someone that could have swept her off her feet and taken her away from there, given her a life, a couple of children and neither of them would be going through this pain.

He knew what he should do, but couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't bring himself to release her. It was foolish to do so, she knew too much. Or at least that is what he told himself, the resistance was all but gone since they had captured General Organa, he knew they were scrambling without her, and their hopes were crushed with Luke dead.

He saw the entrance, it was so much colder, it was dark. They wouldn't be able to leave until the morning.

"We have to stay here tonight. We would freeze within minutes if we tried to go."

She didn't answer, he could feel the discomfort from her but nothing could be done. They had gotten to the waterfall entrance which he knew would take years until it created another barrier hiding it's treasures from anyone who was foolish enough to go there.

He went to the left of the room, she went to the right never glancing his way. He could feel the despair and anger from her. He wondered if it would have just been better had he told her, though since Ben was dead there would have been any way for her to learn the truth. He watched her as she sat curled up trying to stay warm, he wondered how she learned his past. He knew the caves would work with her fears and insecurities, but never did he think they would show her the truth of who he used to be.

* * *

 **Rey**

She was exhausted, she didn't want to think anymore, she didn't want to feel, or remember anything that had happened in the past hours. She wanted to sleep, to get away from the cold and everything else.

She laid down with her back to him, she could feel him watching her and it made her so uneasy. Would he kill her if she were to sleep? She doubted it, he said he wouldn't leave her here. Tears welled in her eyes, she had never pitied herself as much as she did now. Before she had always had hope, it was what kept her going from day to day, but even now that was gone. She didn't have anything to cling to, there was no way she could escape.

She started to cry even harder, her body was so tense from the cold and shivering that it hurt. She tried tucking her cloak around her like a cocoon so that no heat could escape but it did little to help.

She heard his footsteps coming closer to her until they were right behind her. Her body tensing wondering what he was going to do. Maybe he would kill her after all. She was just a scavenger, and he a monster. She felt his hand go under her neck and the other at her knees, she scrambled away from him. She didn't want him so close to her, she definitely didn't want him touching her.

She got to her feet, her fight or flight instincts kicking in she didn't have anything she could fight with so she turned and ran back towards the entrance to the labyrinth. She almost made it into the darkness when her body wouldn't move. She was frozen and she knew it was him. Her body screaming in even more pain as she tried to move her feet.

"Rey, I didn't want to do this, I regret that I have to, but if I don't you may freeze." He said behind her as he wrapped his cloak which he was still wearing around her. His body was against hers and she could feel the unwanted tickle that came with them touching. And she couldn't deny that he was warm, it was like her back to a fire, but she would rather freeze than have him so close to her. She hated him to the very core of her being.

"I would rather freeze Kylo Ren." She told him before succumbing to the darkness.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

They would be leaving soon, the sun would return warming it enough for them to leave. He had held her all night wrapped in his cloak, trying to keep her warm and watching her sleep. He had hoped she would stay asleep until they reached the ship. He would have to put restraints on her again now that she wanted nothing more than see him dead. He didn't get didn't get that luxury, her eyes were fluttering awake.

She looked confused when she first woke up, then memories of the day before flooded her all at once and she struggled to get untangled from his cloak and away from him. It was nice while it lasted he thought.

"What do you think you are doing?"

"You aren't acclimated with the cold, I was just trying to keep you warm, keep you alive."

"I would have rather died." She spat at him.

He knew she was telling the truth. There was nothing left, there was no way to mend what was broken, the trust he was gaining was gone. They would return to the finalizer and he would… What would he do? He couldn't release her, she wouldn't train under him, and he couldn't bring himself to kill her.

"We can leave now." He told her walking to the double doors, he glanced back to see that she was indeed following him.


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: I'm sorry it's been so long since I've added new chapters. My laptop decided to strike and we couldn't come to an agreement, and there was no way I was going to write this on my phone. I still have trouble texting on the ducking thing thanks to auto correct. I hope readers will come back. :)**

* * *

 **Rey**

She sat in her quarters waiting for EL-2923 whom she had just started calling EL. She had been on the Finalizer for two weeks without seeing Kylo Ren. Every day was the same, she would wake, eat, EL would pick her up and take her to the training room where she would learn to work with different weapons and more extensive training with the staff. EL was the only other person she had seen since she had returned and was turning out to be a welcomed friend. Well as much of a friend as she could have in such hostile environment.

She would think of Fin and Han at nights but it would make her lonelier than she already was. She wondered if the prisoners she had seen weeks ago would know anything about them. The woman who walked with such dignity that gave her a weak smile would know anything of her friends.

Her door opened and EL stepped in, she took off her helmet and held it in the crook of her arm. She was a pretty woman, probably a couple years older than Rey, blonde hair that was braided and wrapped around her head and lovely blue eyes. Normally when El arrived Rey was still eating so she would sit with her and wait. That is when she learned about the woman's husband and what they both did on the ship. They normally talked about simple things, Rey enjoyed it.

"El," Rey said pausing, she wanted to ask a favor, a huge favor but didn't know if the woman would agree. "I would like to go speak to the prisoners that are on ship, one in particular."

She could see the uncertainty in El's eyes knowing the answer was no. "I apologize my lady, but there is no approval to do such."

Rey knew that would be the reaction and answer she would get, she also needed to know about her friends. She had to think of something and fast. As much as she hated Kylo Ren she was going to use his name to get what she wanted.

"El, I see you as a friend. And I am Kylo Ren's apprentice to one day join the Knights of Ren. I would think that as such I would have permissions to interrogate prisoners." She said trying to sound confident. She could tell that El was thinking hard about it.

El nodded. "Against my better judgement I'll take you to them, which one in particular were you wishing to speak with?"

"She is a little shorter and I, and older woman."

El nodded "The General!" Rey could see the worry on her friends face, and she just nodded. El's shoulders fell and Rey knew she had won.

"Come on then." El said putting her helmet back on.

Rey followed her deep in the ship, until they came to a trooper who was sitting at a control board. He was leaning back in his chair watching the holonet news, he scrambled out of his chair when he saw them approach. "Sargent."

"I've been instructed to bring Master Ren's apprentice to interrogate General Organa." El told the trooper.

"I'm sorry Sargent, she hasn't been approved to see any of the prisoners, especially the General."

Rey felt disappointed, she didn't think that she would even get this far with El.

"I'm sure we could discuss this with Master Ren, I shall just call him now so this can get sorted out." El stated.

"Wait… Uh… I'm sure since she is the uh… I'm sure if Master Ren wanted. I'll approve it. Cell 23." The trooper stammered and opened the middle blaster door.

Rey thought it sad that even those that did his bidding were terrified of him. Everyone though he was a monster.

El and Rey arrived at the cell door and it opened. "Stay here, I'll be out shortly." Rey said. El nodded.

She went in the cell and saw the woman that had smiled at her. She looked tired, but there was no signs of abuse which Rey was grateful for. The cell was small, there was a cot, a sink, and a toilet, it was what she had expected she would have received at one time.

"Who are you?" The General asked, she didn't sound scared or angry, just curious.

"My name is Rey, and I'm hoping that you can tell me something about my friends."

She noticed the woman assessing her, she tried to tramp down her nervousness. For such a small woman she was intimidating.

"I saw you with Kylo Ren."

Rey noticed the pain the Generals eyes speaking of her son.

"Yes, you smiled at me that day. Why?"

"You have the force girl, and there is no darkness there, though I do sense a change in you since the first time I saw you."

"Yes, well… I've learned what kind of monster Kylo Ren is. But, I've come to ask if you know about Han and Chewie, and also another, his name is Fin, he was a storm trooper who renounced the First Order."

She saw grief flood the Generals face, she didn't need a spoken answer. Tears welled up in Reys eyes and she collapsed to the floor crying in her hands. She felt the Generals arms around her trying to sooth her. "How?" Rey asked.

"We were attacked on D'Qar, but I don't think you need to know details."

"Was it Ben?" She asked looking up, she wanted to see the generals face, she wanted to know the truth.

"No, it was Kylo Ren. He killed Han and Luke that day, as for Chewie and Fin, I don't know what happened to them. I can only imagine the met the same fate since they weren't taken prisoner."

Rey could feel her heart break, not only had he ruined her life, now he took the lives of the only people she cared about, the only people that cared about her.

"Who are you to him?" the general asked.

She didn't know how to answer. She didn't know what she was to him. At one time before she knew of the atrocities he had done and when she just thought of him on another side of the war she thought he could be a teacher, as long as he didn't try to turn her towards using the dark side of the force. He had once said he loved her but she knew that he couldn't love.

"I'm not sure ma'am. I am guessing an apprentice, at one time, before I knew what he was truly capable of. Now…" She didn't know.

"You've spent a great deal of time with him then?"

"I've spent time with him unfortunately, he keeps me as a prisoner, just not in the cells. He trains me in using the force, and weapons. He took me to Ilum and since then I haven't seen him in two weeks. I block him from my life, and I don't know where he is or his emotions from that I'm guessing." She said, she wasn't sure of how much she wanted to tell her, but she sat and listened, she was like a patient mother with her and it was nice.

"So you are his apprentice, you are learning to use the force for the dark side?"

"No. That's his way and I want to be nothing like him."

They sat there on the floor quite, she could tell the general was thinking. She didn't know what to ask, she had questions but didn't feel right asking his mother. There was one thing she may know about though.

"General? How is a force bond broken?"

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He had kept himself busy filtering out the last of the Resistance scattered through the galaxy. Supreme Leader wanted him to go with Hux to speak with the planetary leaders so there would be no treachery within any new alliances made. With the New Republic all but gone the poorer planets that depended on the New Republic for food and medicine weren't getting anything, their citizens dying by the day received much needed supplies from the First Order. They had become the saviors and allegiances were quickly swayed.

He stood in front of her quarters a wooden box in his hands. He had gotten the materials needed for her to build her own lightsaber. He knew he was foolish for getting everything she needed for her to kill him and if she did end up killing him at least he would be free from everything, of his past, and of his never ending need of her.  
Opening the door and going in he knew she wouldn't be there, he had ordered EL-2923 to take her for weapons training everyday but the disappointment still came when he saw the empty room. He set the box on the bed for her when she would return. He thought it best especially since Supreme Leader had ordered him to interrogate the prisoners for any information of hidden resistance bases.

He walked down the halls towards the cells, troopers moving to the sides to avoid him. He still enjoyed their fear of him.

The trooper at the control panel jumped out of his seat when seeing him, "Sir!"

Kylo didn't pay attention to him, he could feel the General, he needed to remind himself he was Kylo Ren, no longer the weak foolish adolescent that looked up to her.

"Are you coming to collect your apprentice sir?"

He stopped. Anger seethed through him. How dare she be down here! He turned and held out his hand. The trooper was pulled by the force to him, his hands around the trooper's throat. "What did you say?"

The trooper gasping for air, trying to free his neck from the dark lords fingers, he wouldn't even been able to answer if he wanted to. Kylo released the trooper, falling to the floor sucking up as much air as his lungs would allow

"Your" breath "apprentice that you," breath "sent to interrogate."

He opened the door to the left and resumed down the hall, his saber in his hand. He would kill both of them. They must think him a fool!

Opening the door to the cell he saw the renegade storm trooper FN-2817 sitting on his cot, dried blood on his ripped clothing, his right side of his face swollen.  
"Where is she traitor?"

FN-2817 said nothing, he didn't even look up to acknowledge Kylo's presence. He couldn't contain his anger any longer, he brought his saber to life and slashed the cot in half, it fell and so did the ex trooper. "WHERE IS REY!"

He noticed that had gotten the traitors attention. He looked up at him, only one of his eyes could be seen, the other swollen shut.

"I thought she was dead. You murdered her."

Kylo ren stood in front of the broken man, he reached into his thoughts and mind. He saw his life, when he became a traitor, when he met and fell for Rey, and the pain that he was still dealing with mourning her. He didn't know that Rey was alive and aboard the finalizer. The traitor wasn't even trying to block anything from him, he was defeated and wanted nothing more than a quick and painless death.

Leaving the traitors cell he went back to the command post "Which cell?"

"23 Sir."

"Have the recording sent to me straight away." Kylo said continuing to the cell. He saw EL-2329 standing outside the door.

"Why are you here and not in the training room Sargent?" He couldn't keep the anger out of his voice.

"Master Ren. Your apprentice stated that she wished to interrogate the prisoner. I… ah…"

He held up his hand for her to stop. "I see. You are relieved of your duties today. You will receive new orders tomorrow."

"Master Ren?" He heard her say, even through the helmet he could hear apprehension in her voice.

"GO! NOW!" His patience wearing thin. Did every trooper plan on disobeying his orders? Did he need to prove to them again that his word was law? First FN-2817, then EL-2329, and again with the trooper at the command post. He would need to speak to Phasma about her soldiers and if she couldn't keep them in control then he would.


	28. Chapter 28

**Rey**

"Child, I don't know much about the force, I can feel it, I know it's there, but when it comes to subjects as these Luke would have been the sibling to talk to. I don't know much about a force bond, and all I do know is that they are rare, but powerful things. I believe death is the only thing to sever one."

Rey felt crushed, she wanted to be her own person again. She was always tired from just keeping him blocked out.

"Is it with my son?"

Rey nodded.

"Rey, I believe there is still light in him. Has he told you of Vader?"

"No, I just know he wants to be as powerful as he was."

"Darth Vader wasn't always a Sith lord, he was once a Jedi Master, and before that a slave."

Rey was in shock. She knew instantly that General Organa was talking about Anakin Skywalker. "Anakin?" she asked just for reassurance.

"Yes. My father, Ben's grandfather. He was one of the most powerful Sith in the Empire, he died rejecting the dark side. I believe if Vader could do it Ben can also be redeemed. I can't give up hope."

Rey saw the pleading in the generals eyes, she wanted to help, but she didn't think there was any way she could. She also didn't think that Kylo Ren had a shred of light left in him. He killed Luke, he had killed his own father.

"Thank you General for speaking to me." Rey said as she stood up, holding her hand out to help the older woman off the floor.

"Dear, please call me Leia, I'm no longer a princess, nor am I a general." She had said with a sad smile as she stood.

Leia held out her arms for an embrace which Rey quickly accepted. They both heard the door open and jumped. His tall frame taking up the entire doorway.

 **Kylo Ren**

"How nice, the two women who would like nothing more than see my death in a sweet embrace."

He wondered if they were plotting their revenge against him. His mother and apprentice. He saw the shock on Rey's face, the general just stood there with a disapproving look. The same look she gave Han so many times when he would tell them he had a job and would be leaving.

"Don't hurt her Ben." Leia said, he could see the worry on her face.

"Quiet Woman! She is my apprentice, she must be punished for going where she did not belong!" He shouted. His temper quickly rising he grabbed Rey by the arm and dragged her away slamming the door shut behind them.

He didn't let go of her, nor did his grip loosen as they made their way back to his quarters. She had tripped over her feet a couple times, he just kept his swift pace, she struggled to keep up with him.

He felt everything from her, she didn't have any barriers up against him. He felt her embarrassment when they would pass troopers who would stop and watch the scene that was unfolding in front of them. He knew there would be talk, but he didn't care, it might even be for the better. They all knew that she was under his protection and if he would handle his own apprentice with such roughness and disregard then he would do far worse to them if they disobeyed him. He felt her fear of him, another emotion he was used to.

Reaching his quarters he released her with a shove. "Did you enjoy your heart-to-heart with General Organa? What did she tell you?" His anger was growing he could feel the darkness making him stronger from it.

"She told me what you did to Han. That you murdered him!" She said tears filling her eyes.

He walked toward her, she was still on the ground, she was scrambling away from him. That Bitch! She had no right, Rey had no right. They didn't understand what he knew, what he needed to do. What Vader showed him he had to do to extinguish the light, what he had to do to finish what was started so long ago. He could feel the regret still from killing his father and Luke, it made him feel weak. He felt as if he were about to explode, rage and anger was overwhelming him. He didn't feel like himself, he could feel so much power from it that it was intoxicating.

He saw her cowering against the wall, this girl who had put him through pain, who was conspiring with his mother to kill him. She made him weak, if he were to ever be as great as Vader he would have to get rid of her.

"Did she convince you to kill me Rey." He felt he needed to hear the words, to know what was said. She didn't reply, she didn't even look up at him. He grabbed his light saber igniting it slashing at the wall beside her.

"Just get this over with Kylo Ren. I can't anymore." He heard her say barely above a whisper.

He disengaged his saber. His anger was receding. She had asked him to end her life, and the thought of him doing it ripped him apart. "Did she tell you to kill me?"

She looked at him, tears and pain flooding her eyes. "You've killed everyone I once cared about Kylo Ren. Han, Chewie, Fin, and if you were honest with me, Ben Solo. You killed her brother, her husband, and her son, and yet she asked me to try to guide you to the light. She believes that you can be redeemed."

He knew she was being truthful, guilt flooded him. He couldn't help himself, he could always take a bad situation and make it worse. His inability to control his anger and when it came to Rey and his uncertainty it made him irrational.

"What do you think? Do you think the monster can be redeemed into a man?" He asked her, his voice calm.

"I think…" she looked hesitant to continue.

He removed his helmet and knelt in front of her, "what do you think Rey?" He wanted her to see him, see that he wasn't going to hurt her, not anymore than he had already.

"I think that the monster doesn't wish to be a man." She said looking into his eyes, he saw such sadness in them. He was crushing his light, everything he had done to get her to trust him was gone and it was all because he did to her what his family did to him, not telling the truth.

 **Rey**

She could feel the heat from newest gash he had made in the wall beside her. Could smell the melted metal. It could have been easily her flesh. She told him what he wanted to know. She did want it to end, she would rather not have it end with her death, but she didn't believe she would be ever set free. She wasn't sure what was worse, being held by him or death.

She watched him as he stood and walked to the panel that led to her room opening it. "This will stay open from now on. If you wish to kill me in my sleep do it quickly and precise."

She could never understand him. Did he want to die? "Why?"

He didn't answer her, and she didn't like it. She would sleep in the refresher if she had to just to keep a door between them. She got up and went to her quarters. He didn't even look in her direction as she left.

She noticed the box on her bed immediately, she could feel a call to it. She sat on the bed and saw a note.

' _Rey,_

 _Although I cannot change the past, together with your light, and my dark we could change the future. Together there could be a grey.'_

She started felt the tears again, she would never understand him. She read the note again and again. Could he find his way to the light. The note sure sounded like it, but she had just experienced the monster he could be. And if he were to find his way back to the light how could she do anything to help? She wished she didn't have to do this alone, she wished she could talk to Leia again, ask her how.

She opened the box, it contained an old leather bound book, different metal components and the two kyber crystals she had thought she left on Ilum. She took out the book and flipped through the pages, there were instructions on how to make light sabers, different designs, different types based on the needs of the user.

She placed the book in the box, laid down and cried herself to sleep.

 **Kylo Ren**

He found himself back at the cell command center. The trooper stood at attention upon seeing Kylo. "Cell 23, turn off the recorders."

He didn't know why he was back here, it was foolish. He still needed to try to find answers about any other resistance bases but he knew he wouldn't get answers from her.

She was sitting on her cot, he could see the worry on her face.

"Did you kill the girl?"

"You worry about the wrong things General."

"She seems to be very brave young lady." Leia said smiling. "How's that force bond working out for you?"

He didn't answer.

"You love the girl don't you Ben?"

"Ben is dead."

"Well then Kylo Ren, you have followed your father's and my follies with this girl, and the darkness in you will not help your cause."

"She had begun to accept the darkness." He spat bitterly.

She hung her head "No Ben. She was accepting your light."

He turned and left. He had no light left, as much as they both wished it, as soon as his saber went through Han it went out like a flame.


	29. Chapter 29

**Kylo Ren**

He stood in the doorway watching her flip through the pages of the leather bound book, the box and all the pieces beside it. He hadn't seen her in two days, other than passing the door way as she paced.

"I thought you would have built and taken apart your saber twenty times by now." He knew she loved to tinker with things

She glanced up at him then returned her attention to the book. He knew this wasn't going to be easy, and maybe he should have waited a while longer to speak to her, but he needed to continue training her. Supreme Leader asked about her training every day and every day he would tell him the same thing. That it was slow since there was no trust. He was afraid that his master would think she was taking to much of his time away from the First Order, but each time he would nod and tell him to gain her trust. He knew Snoke wanted Rey to join them, she was powerful with the force. She was a great asset to the First Order and Supreme Leader himself.

"We are going to train today. It's been neglected."

"Where is El?"

He knew that she had liked EL-2923 and had considered her a friend. "She was relieved from her duties from weapon training with you and retains her old position."

"So she wasn't hurt because of me?" She said looking up at him, worry showing in her face. He shook his head no. He watched as she let out a breath of relief.

"We are going to work using the force today Rey, no weapons."

"Still afraid I'm going to kill you?" She had said with a small smirk.

He just returned her smirk. He knew this small interaction hadn't mended anything but it was a starting point.

They had stayed in her quarters to train, he was teaching her how to manipulate the force to move objects. He had been impressed how quickly she had caught on, especially since she was so horrible at meditation. She was powerful, but still so raw.

"Sir!" He heard Phasma say over his com. "We have a small band of resistance fighters attacking our humanitarian supply ship outside of Pamarthe."

"Phasma, send them reinforcements, do not lose that ship."

He had worked too hard to build the alliance with the once rebels. They were in need of medical supplies which the First Order was more than happy to give. Pamarthens were a proud race, and Kylo Ren knew of their courage and skill that would be very useful.

"Rey, we are leaving."

* * *

 **Rey**

She looked at him with surprise, losing her focus the plant she was lifting fell to the floor with a loud thump.

"Huh?"

She saw him put his helmet on and didn't move. This wasn't her war, she was not going to watch as they killed resistance pilots. "I'm not going." She told him crossing her arms.

He stopped, "So you would rather not do anything and let the resistance stop medical supplies going to the Pamarthens? Women, Men, and Children who are dying of illnesses that can be prevented?"

She felt guilt wash over her, he was right. The resistance attacking a ship just because it was a First Order transport ship was also wrong. She got up and followed him to the hanger that housed his command ship.

They were traveling to the outter rim, she was hoping that she would not see any of the fight. There were needless casualties but the ones that had it worse were those like the Pamarthens.

It didn't take them long to make it to where the battle was, and she was glad that it looked as if it were over. She could see the debris of both tie fighters and x wings scattered throughout. She also knew that scavengers would go through the wreckage and leave no piece behind.

She saw the supply ship, it had sustained considerable damage but it looked as it was functional enough to land. Kylo had flanked the supply ship as they passed through the atmosphere. She saw the planet once they passed the clouds that covered it. The entire planet was an ocean. Getting closer she noticed that there were tiny islands that scattered in the water, she could see large watercrafts between the island connect by bridges.

She noticed that they were heading towards a large watercraft, it seemed to be its own island, even larger than some the actual islands littering the water. They landed beside the supply ship, Kylo shut his ship down and handed her a cloak as he put down the ramp at the back of the ship.

"Put this on, don't say anything, just follow close to me."

"What if I'm asked a question?" She said taking the cloak. She didn't want to be a spectator, not when it was for something that was good, for something that helps people, keeps them alive.

"Well, we can use this as training, make yourself not seen." He said as he started down the ramp. She quickly followed him just getting the cloak on.

She noticed the air was warm and wet, she was having trouble keeping her balance the craft was gently rocking from the waters movements. She tried to stay close to him without falling but finding it difficult. She stopped when he did, he was speaking to a man in a military uniform, she wasn't paying much attention to their conversation busy looking at the world around her. There were birds flying overhead, the clouds were fluffy and grey, she wasn't expecting a larger wave to hit the vessel, she about fell, but strong hands helped her steady herself.

"Looks as if someone needs to get their sea legs." She heard the stranger say, she looked up and saw a man who was devilishly handsome smiling at her. He's dark hair falling over golden eyes, his skin almost copper in color.

"Thank you, I guess I need to pay more attention." She said with an embarrassed smile at her clumsiness.

"Gareth Sonnel." He said with a small bow.

She started blushing, she had never had anyone bow to her. She was a scavenger, nobody of importance.

She felt a gloved hand on her shoulder, she felt the charge from it, though she didn't need the link to know who it was. "Gareth, this is my apprentice." His voice holding no emotion, but she didn't need to hear it in his voice, she could feel the anger. He had told her not to speak to anyone, to make herself unseen and she had failed miserably.

* * *

 **Kylo Ren**

He heard conversation behind him, why couldn't she just listen to him for once. He turned seeing Sonnel letting go of her elbow and introducing himself. He saw the blush on her face and jealousy ripped through him. He placed his hand on her shoulder to show this man that she was his.

He told her not to be seen, to be invisible, though he knew it was impossible. She was beautiful, and when she smiled she could light a dark room with it. He also knew Gareth Sonnel, he loved women as much as he liked a fight.

"Gareth, this is my apprentice."

"Ah, Master Ren. I would like to thank you personally for your help. I'm sure that our alliance with the First Order will be a great one." Gareth said, he turned his attention back to Rey. "Would you and your apprentice like to join me for a celebratory drink?"

"No." He wanted to get Rey away from this man as soon as possible. His sister worked side by side with his mother with the resistance for years, although Gareth didn't know who Kylo used to be. He and Gareth had never gotten along, he would tease Ben unmercifully. Him and his friends would throw rocks at him when he wasn't looking, mock him for being an outcast, telling him that his own father didn't even want to be around him, though then and now he didn't care about any of that. What he cared about now was the way he looked at Rey.

Gareth returned his attention to Kylo, "Please, I would take it as a personal insult if you didn't allow me this small gesture of thanks Master Ren. The supplies are much needed for Pamarthe and it's people."

He now wished like hell that he had never come, he should have sent Hux, or even one of his Knights, but he wanted Rey to see firsthand what they were doing. He had learned how to be diplomatic watching his mother, and he was very good at it, that is why Supreme Leader liked when he went on these missions. He gestured for Gareth to lead the way, his hand not leaving Rey's shoulder they followed.

"Rey? What do you think of our planet?" Gareth asked looking back at her.

"I think there is too much water." She replied, he could feel her nervousness. She seemed to want the same as he did, just to leave.

* * *

 **Rey**

She didn't expect the booming laughter that came from their host. They came to a rope bridge from the vessel to an island, she would be happy to be on stationary land, but she was nervous about crossing the bridge. It didn't look very stable as it lightly swayed from the breeze. She watched the water wave under it. She wondered how deep it was, living on a desert planet she had never learned to swim. The thought of drowning terrified her.

"Nothing will harm you Rey." She heard Kylo say beside her, she looked at him. His voice was confident and she wished she could see his face.

She walked on the bridge, never letting go of the rope hand guide. By the time they made it over her hand was burned from the rough rope and how tight she held it, sliding her hand along it. She was glad to be on land, but knew she would have to cross the bridge again to get back.

They arrived at a cantina and found a quiet spot in the back of the room.

She felt uncomfortable, Gareth was speaking to a young girl telling her to bring his guest a round of drinks and some food. His attention went to Kylo and they were discussing how their alliance could benefit both of them. That his people would enjoy piloting for the First Order since they were some of the best pilots in the galaxy as long as the First Order continued with medical supplies and even trained med-droids.

The girl had laid out food for them and placed drinks in front of them. She seemed leery of getting close to Kylo Ren, he could even bring fear to those who didn't know of him, or did they. She still didn't know much about him other than his lies and confusing actions.

"Rey, where are you from?" Gareth asked breaking her from her own thoughts.

"Jakku." She didn't like that the attention was back on her.

"Jakku?" He said with surprise. "If I had known the harsh deserts produced such lovely women I would have visited there long ago."

She blushed at the compliment, she looked down at the table not knowing what to say.

"Please have a drink!" Gareth said lifting his glass.

She lifted her glass only to have Kylo push it back down to the table. "Gareth, I am glad that there is an alliance with Pamarthe and the First Order, please let us know if you require anything. Another shipment will arrive within the week." He stood up and held out his hand to her, she took it knowing his ire was growing, she didn't wish to put fuel on the fire by resisting a simple gesture.

Gareth stood when she did, he smiled at her as he bowed again. "Rey, it has been a pleasure to make your acquaintance. If you ever find the need for anything please do not hesitate to ask."

Kylo put his arm around her shoulder, she could feel the tingle from him, and also the anger. He led her out the door back the way they came. Neither of them speaking until they returned to the ship.

She entered the ship behind him. His breathing was hard, he was itching at his palms through his gloves.

"Close the ramp." His voice cold, trying to hide the anger she knew he felt. Hesitantly she did as she was told, not sure where his rage would go. Surely he would destroy the ship.

He unlatched his helmet and threw it against the wall, she stood in the corner hoping she wouldn't be next. He told me not to talk to anyone, to be invisible she thought and now he may just kill her.


	30. Chapter 30

**Kylo Ren**

He was trying to contain his rage returning to the ship. He knew anger, but jealousy, this was a whole new emotion. He had felt twinges of it before when he saw Alask and Rey talking, and when he had thought she was visiting FN-2187, but it was nothing like what he felt now. He knew if he didn't leave the cantina that the mission would have been a total failure, he wanted nothing more than to put his light saber through Gareth's chest.

"Close the ramp." He said struggling to keep the emotion out of his voice. He was breathing hard, he wanted to destroy something, his palms itching to grab his saber and lash out, to release the anger and frustration he was feeling. He took off his helmet throwing it against the wall, it wasn't enough damage, he needed something else.

He looked around the ship and saw her, she looked like a scared animal pressed in the corner. He felt if he didn't get rid of the anger somehow he would catch fire.

He took a couple strides and he was in front of her, she was looking up at him, he could see her fear, he could feel it, but he had to get rid of his anger. He grabbed her with one arm around her back and lifted her against the wall, his lips pressed hard against hers. He used his tongue to force her mouth open kissing her. He tasted blood, not sure if it was his or hers he lightened his kiss, his free hand gently cupping the side of her face. He felt her respond, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back.

He could feel the anger and jealousy fade, he knew he needed to stop, but his body's need was more than his brain. His body won the fight, his hand moved from her face to cup her breast, he felt her stiffen against him, but he didn't stop, he gently kneaded her breast, his mouth and tongue still exploring hers. He heard her groan from the back of her throat. He felt her lust, it matched his, creating an electricity around them, he moved his mouth to her neck, her nails cutting into the nape of his neck. He wasn't sure if he could even contain himself any longer between the need he felt from her, the stinging pain on the back of his neck, and the taste of her skin, he was afraid he would cum before he could even enjoy her. He felt her legs wrap around his, she was using his body to keep her in place. Spinning around moving her away from the wall and breaking the kiss he knelt and gently laid her on the floor, kissing her again before she realized what was happening.

He removed the cloak from around her neck as he kissed her jaw. One hand holding himself over her, the other unfastening her shirt. He wanted to see her again, he wanted to touch every part of her body. His lips trailed down her neck and chest to the small breast, her pink nipple hard begging for him to pay attention to it. He nipped at her nipple, he heard her take a breath in from shock. He felt her arching her back begging for more. As he teased her nipple with his mouth his hand traveled to her round firm ass, he lifted it to him so she could feel his hard cock between the fabric that separated them. He smiled against her breast when he heard her moan in pleasure.

He wanted to feel her, he wanted to be deep inside her but he knew she was a virgin, he needed to control himself so he didn't hurt her. He felt a pang of guilt that he hadn't stopped earlier, but it was quickly forgotten when she grinded herself against his cock. His head lifted from her breast, he groaned, using his free hand he quickly removed his cloak over his head and tossed it aside, then returned his attention to her, kissing, licking and nipping her other breast, her still grinding on him. He could hear her groaning, and it was driving him mad. He slid his hand down her stomach and beneath her pants, finding a patch of soft hair, his finger gently making circular motion on her clit.

"mmmm Kylo" she moaned.

He froze, she had actually said his name in the throes of lust, he sat up, looking down at her, her body flush, her eyes closed, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She opened her eyes watching him, her cheeks blushing even redder, unbuckling his belt, he threw it to the side, he then took off his tunic and his under armor. He watched her as she examined his body. If she were to stop anything she would need to do it now he thought, he was hoping she wouldn't

 **Rey**

Everywhere he kissed and touched burned and tingled, she had never felt such pleasure, her body screaming for a release. She wanted to cry when he sat up and removed his hands from rubbing her clit. It was so much different than when she touched herself. She opened her eyes to see him looking down at her, his eyes burning, but his face looked as if he were in awe. She watched him as he started to disrobe, she couldn't take her eyes off of him. He was gorgeous, his dark hair falling over his brow, his body was muscular, shoulders wide. His body was scared, and most notably the scar on his shoulder that he must have gotten the same time he received the scar on his face. It didn't make him any less handsome. She noticed the line of black hair that traveled down his stomach into his pants, she reached out her hand to touch his stomach, but pulled back. Embarrassment flooding through her. She felt him grab her hand with both of his, he put it up to his mouth and kissed her palm. He looked at her and a smile crossed his face, he then nipped her finger tip.

He let go of her hand and leaned in to kiss her again, she welcomed it. She felt him unfasten her pants, his hand delving deeper past the folds and felt his fingers enter her. Her eyes widened at the pleasure he was giving her, his finger moving in and out of her, she felt his thumb rubbing her clit at the same time. It was getting hard for her to breath, she couldn't think of anything other than the waves that were rippling through her body. She had to hold on to something or she felt she would fall. She wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him to her. She felt as she were about to explode, her breath was more of a pant now. She felt another finger join with the first, he was kissing her neck. All the sensations were too much. Suddenly her body did explode, or that is the only way she could describe it. She felt herself throbbing around his fingers, and as the feeling peaked it slowly subsided.

She released her grip around his neck, he leaned on his elbow a devilish smile across his face. She wrapped her shirt around her and held it with one hand and covered her face with the other. Remorse and humiliation flooded her. What had just happened and how did it happen she wondered. Her body was a traitor, she knew that doing anything intimate would make their situation so much awkward, she was still his prisoner. What kind of person would do even half of what they had just done?

"Rey." She heard him say, she didn't want to uncover her face, she did not want to see him. She was ashamed of herself, tears were gathering in her eyes. She always thought she was stronger, that she was in charge of her life, her body. But all of that had been taken away from her hadn't it. He took charge of her life, and he was able to make her body want things that he brain would never do. And she wasn't sure of what her heart wanted. One minute he could charm her, the next she would hate him. All the awful things he had done, but then he could be so gentle with her, he would send medical supplies to worlds that were in desperate need of it.

"REY!" He said more forcefully, not hostile, just enough to get her attention.

She uncovered her face and looked at him, she didn't want to talk to him, she didn't want him to talk to her. She just wanted to hide. His brown eyes were soft looking at her, his hand stroked her face, he wiped the tear away from the corner of her eye. She had to stop herself from moving her head toward his hand, the tickle that came from his touch.

"I am not sorry for what just happened." He said gently.

That had made it even worse for her. "Of course you aren't. You seduced me, why should you be sorry?" She pushed him to try to get him off her so she could get dressed and get as far from him as possible on such a small ship. But he didn't move, didn't even budge an inch.

"Damn it Rey!" She could feel his frustration. He stood up and collected his clothing. She sat up fastening her shirt back, she also put the cloak back on. When she was done she looked over at him. He hadn't gotten back dressed, his back was to her, hands against the wall, and his head was hanging down. She saw even more scars on his back, some thin, most were not, they were from deep wounds.

She wondered what he would do if she asked to go back to Jakku. She felt that he would say no, but he was always surprising her. She also wondered what he would be like if he weren't Kylo Ren, but Ben Solo, less conflicted, though she had a feeling that even as Ben Solo he was conflicted. What if he were to denounce the First Order, forget that any of this had happened and started new. She shook that thought out of her head, how could either of them forget what had happened in the past?

"Kylo?" She asked hesitantly. She saw he turned his head and cut his eyes at her waiting for her to say what was on her mind. "Would you ever consider taking me back to Jakku?"

He didn't say anything, he just looked back down at the floor.


	31. Chapter 31

**Kylo Ren**

He was sorry for what he had done, he had used her to control his anger. He could feel her shame, and her confusion. Her body called out to be touched once he started he denied his own need to see to hers. He didn't want to make love to her on a cold metal floor of his command shuttle, he wanted to take her when she asked him to, which would most likely be never. The thought of her under him would no doubt be burned into his memory forever.

"Kylo?"

He turned his head and looked at her to acknowledge he had heard her.

"Would you ever consider taking me back to Jakku?"

He returned his gaze back to the floor. He wished like hell he had never even heard of Jakku, his life was simpler without her in it, which is saying a lot because he had never had a simple life. But since there was no going back he wouldn't be able to be without her. He knew she could never love him, not Kylo Ren, he was sure she wouldn't have been able to love Ben Solo either. Both men were torn, one to the darkness, the other to the light, no matter who he was he was broken, and this scavenger seemed to make him feel whole.

Kylo collected his clothing that was scattered on the floor dressing himself, including his helmet. He saw she was sitting in one of the passenger seats chewing on her bottom lip. He really had a love hate feeling when she did that, he loved seeing it, but hated knowing she was thinking hard. He sat in the pilot seat and they headed back to the Finalizer in silence.

Kylo landed the ship and was stopped by Hux, "Ren, Supreme Leader would like a word with you and your... apprentice."

He didn't like the way that Hux accentuated apprentice with disdain in his voice. How he would love to crush the overconfident bastard's windpipe and had many satisfying dreams about it. He just nodded to Hux and walked past him.

He knew that Rey was right behind him and heard everything the arrogant general had said so she knew where they were going. He looked behind him to be certain, she was, her hair falling on both sides of her face as, her eyes were downcast, she was still wearing the cloak he had told her wear on Pamarthe, the hood up. She looked as if she were trying to be invisible, if she would have only done that earlier he thought continuing on the path to see Supreme Leader.

They reached the hologram chamber and he looked down at her. "Try not to let him get in your head Rey. He is strong with the force, also don't let him see any emotions that he could use against you."

She looked at him confused. "He can see my thoughts from so far away?"

"Only if you let him."

 **Rey**

She nodded hoping she could block him and her emotions. Maybe she needed to ask him for a mask as well for when she had to face the Supreme Leader.

She watched him motion his hand in front of the door and it opened, and followed him in. The room was empty other than a rise in the middle, it was much like the Supreme Leaders throne room in his temple, a large empty domed room, dark and ominous. The path was dimly lit by lights in the floor and ended to create a circle.

She saw the flicker of the hologram and he sat on his throne, just as she saw him a little over a month before, except the hologram made him so much larger than in person. She stood beside Kylo holding her hands in front of her and trying to look through him as she did in their previous meeting.

"Kylo Ren, you have done well. You've made two strong alliances in the past three days." His voice rang through the room, gravely but strong. "And young Rey." She looked up at the hologram not expecting him to speak to her. "Have you learned much under Kylo Ren?" She could feel his scrutiny even through a hologram, he made her feel nervous and uncomfortable. She didn't know what to say, her eyes darted to Kylo then Supreme Leader, she knew he said keep her emotions to herself but it was difficult. She didn't know how to answer him.

"Well?" He said sounding a bit impatient for her to answer.

She said the first thing that came to her mind. "I can't seem to meditate properly Sir."

"Supreme Leader" she heard Kylo whisper to her.

"I mean Supreme Leader." She now wished she knew how to be invisible, how to hide in plain sight, but she was shocked. She heard a deep laughter echo through the room, she couldn't believe it, Supreme Leader was laughing at her. It almost seemed unnatural coming from him, she couldn't imagine him ever laughing but he was.

"Yes, meditation can be hard girl, but it is good to learn. It helps you bond with the force, with everything living, even yourself. If you do not know yourself you cannot know the force to its full potential, therefore you will never be at your full potential." He said, his voice wasn't mocking, but seemed full of wisdom and thought.

"Yes Supreme Leader." She said nodding.

"And do your trust your Master girl?"

Him calling Kylo Ren her Master irked her, it made her feel like property. She wasn't sure how to answer this question either, of course she didn't trust Kylo Ren, he murders people, he can't control his temper, and could kill her without even touching her. Yet, he wouldn't leave her to freeze on Ilum, he had never laid a hand on her in anger, unless seducing her counted though on their way back she hated the way she enjoyed it so much and wondered what it would be like to actually have sex with him.

She needed to get that thought out of her mind, she could feel the color rising in her cheeks.

"I will take that as a yes then girl."

She lowered her head trying to hide her face from them both, she had failed twice to listen to Kylo, and twice it landed her in hot water.

"Kylo Ren, continue your diplomatic talks with the planets that are in need, the rest will follow soon after seeing how generous the First Order is."

"Yes Supreme Leader."

She felt his hand touch her elbow, the que she had learned that they were to leave and looked up, hoping her face wasn't as red as it felt. They started walking back to the door when Snoke stopped them. "Kylo Ren, you will take your apprentice with you on your diplomatic missions."

"Yes Supreme Leader." He said and continued walking, his hand still at her elbow.

She walked behind him deep in thought, why would Snoke want her to join him on his missions? She didn't like it, it would mean that they would spend a lot more time together. Most of the time she wanted to get away from him. He frustrated her more than anyone she had ever met, even more than Unkar Plutt and his unfair negotiations for rations even starving because of them sometimes.

 **Kylo Ren**

He had never heard his Master laugh, he didn't even know he could laugh. He wondered if this scavenger, this desert flower could bring light out of anyone? Even Snoke? He needed to be very careful around his Master when it came to Rey. He seemed to have gained more of an interest in his apprentice and knew how Snoke would be able to poison her mind to use her past and even himself to turn her to the dark side of the force. Kylo couldn't imagine such a bright light being extinguished. For him he had to choose a side, he felt pain and anguish as both Ben Solo and Kylo Ren, he figured that at least with the path of the Dark Side he could be more powerful.

He also didn't like that she would be going on missions with him, on the Finalizer she was safe, but going with him she could be a target for any of his enemies and he had a galaxy full of them. Even worse, she could run.

They arrived at his quarters and she went straight to hers, he didn't follow, he just watched as she slipped into her own sanctuary. Him going to his desk he looked at the work that needed done but couldn't focus. All he could think about is what had transpired during the day. The way Gareth looked at her, and how she smiled and blushed at the scum. And then trying to get her to drink port of the storm, one sip and she would be hammered, and he knew Gareth to well to. Now with Supreme Leaders orders he would have to deal with more men, though he couldn't think of anyone worse than the pompous ass they had just dealt with. He wasn't sure if he could handle going through that type of jealousy every time they were to go on a mission, though the aftermath of his jealousy and what was done to quell it was pretty incredible he had to admit.

His thoughts drifted to the ship, and seeing her body under him. He could feel the blood rushing to his cock getting hard. He hadn't been with a woman in a while and the need was great. He could probably get whatever storm trooper he wanted for a quick release, but he didn't want just whatever random woman on the ship. He had his pick for the most part, some wouldn't come to him willingly and he would never make them, then there were the others. The ones that would all but beg him so they could hope to get in the hierarchy they hoped it would bring. They all knew that he was Supreme Leaders right hand, his most valued man, and they figured if they could ever get their claws in him they would never have to work a day in their life. Rey though, she wasn't like that, he was sure she had never even thought of it.

He saw her pass the doorway she was drying her hair wearing the same scavenger clothing as she had every day. He mentally cursed himself, he hadn't even thought of her to get her new clothing, and now that she would be a diplomat for the First Order she would need to look the part. How in the hell was he supposed to find her something suitable. He thought of a couple places but knew it was unwise for him to travel there, he needed to think of something else.

He got up and went straight to the storm trooper training deck. There were at least 50 troopers training on the deck, some engaging in hand to hand combat, others were working on blaster training with targets, it made him remember the battle on D'Qar and how horrible their aim was.

He scanned the room, she wasn't hard to miss, her armor gleaming and reflecting the lights. He strode down to where she was, "Captain Phasma."

She finished barking her commands to her troops, she treated them with respect but also firmly. She was proud of her men and women, they were her children which she molded and trained to be loyal soldiers.

"Yes Sir?"

He was unsure how to ask her to go shopping for Rey, he wasn't even certain that she herself had anything other than her First Order uniforms. "You're a woman."

"Sir?" He could hear the curiosity and disbelief in her voice.

"I need you to go to Coruscant. Supreme Leader has ordered that my apprentice accompany me on negotiating missions and I need her to look the part." He felt a bit embarrassed to ask her, but it was someone he trusted and respected.

"I understand Sir. Will your apprentice be joining me? Or shall I be going alone?" She asked.

He didn't think of Rey going with Phasma, he just had assumed that the captain would say yes and be on her way.

"I will think on it. Be prepared to leave at 6 tomorrow. Oh and Captain?"

"Yes?"

"Do you own a dress?" Kylo smiled, amusement could be heard from behind his mask.


	32. Chapter 32

**Rey**

She took the tray of food from the droid and set it on the table. She felt better now that she had showered, thought she couldn't get the earlier events off her mind. She sat eating her meal going over what had happened on Pamarthe, and his behavior. He had gotten so angry at her? She thought of Kylo and his interaction with Gareth that he seemed to hate him. He apparently knew the handsome man who was kind to her. Maybe she thought it wasn't her that he was angry about, but Gareth. Though he seemed outgoing and friendly, at least what she saw of him, but maybe everyone has a dark side.

She thought about his anger once they returned to the ship, and what followed it. She remembered the delicious feeling of his lips on her breasts, his hands on her body. She was embarrassed, she enjoyed everything he did to her, she wondered if it would be that way with any man. She wondered if it had been Gareth instead of Kylo Ren would it have been so pleasurable. The thought of Gareth touching her took away any excitement her body was feeling from the memory. "Guess not." She said to herself throwing the half eaten loaf of bread down on her plate.

She opened the book and started to look through the designs of light sabers, she was itching to build hers and had already opted for a staff but there were a few to choose from. Hearing the door open to her quarters she didn't even look up.

"You don't belong here sympathizer scum."

Her head shot up, when she heard the door she automatically assumed it was Kylo, instead it was a man with red hair wearing a black uniform. He stared at her with hate in his blue eyes. She didn't move, just watched him as he stared at her. She could tell that given the chance he would drag her to the cells with all the other prisoners, or worse kill her where she sat.

"You are nothing but a scavenger." He snarled at her, his face twisted with hostility. "You are nothing but a pet for Kylo Ren aren't you? Now that we have all but won the war he needs something to do in his spare time."

She was good at ignoring people and their words, having to do so on Jakku, but it was hard to, especially when he called her a pet and he was so damn arrogant. "And who are you that you think you know so much?"

"I know everything that happens on my ship!" He practically screamed, spit spewing from his mouth much like the venom in his words.

He started to walk towards her, she didn't move thought she was on guard. This man was dangerous, he seemed like he was a crazy man, and mad men were unpredictable.

"Hopefully he tires of you soon, unless you truly are that good of a whore." He said with a snarky grin.

She felt the anger spiraling from his words, she tried to tamp it down, she felt it was what he wanted. He wanted her to react, to maybe even go after him so he had reason to get rid of her. She closed her eyes, she was trying to feel the force around her, to calm herself, then she felt it, a shift in the air, she opened her eyes just in time to see him pulling out a blaster from his belt. Sudden realization hit her, she would die if she didn't do anything. She raised her hand and used the force to push him, she watched as he pulled the trigger and felt stinging pain on the side of her head above her ear, it broke any concentration she had. She ducked behind the desk trying to figure out her next move. She might be able to make it to the refresher and close the door. She heard his footsteps moving closer, she felt like a trapped animal and she had nowhere she could flee and be safe. He still had the blaster and could easily kill her if she ran. She used the heavy desk, using the force she shoved it as hard as she could towards the mad man, she heard a grumph from him knowing she had hit him with it. She didn't stop pushing it, she could see it was still pushing him away from her, she used it to her advantage and ran through the open door to Kylo's quarters knowing she didn't have much time. She struggled to look for the hidden button that would close the doors between her and her attacker but nothing was found. Aggravated and scared for her life she looked around for a weapon, looking in the drawers in his desk and again nothing.

His door lifted open, and she saw him with his saber out, he knew! She saw it as a chance to escape, she ran to the open door to get away from the red headed mad man, but Kylo grabbed her arm before she could slip by him, she tried to tug free from his strong grip, she wanted to get away since she had nothing she could fight with. She heard a clank of metal on metal behind her, turning around she saw him, his blaster still in his hand, he had grabbed at the door opening, his breath was heavy, his eyes scanning the quarters until he found her. She could see the satisfaction in his eyes turn to fear when he saw Kylo Ren standing there his light saber engaged.

"General Hux, what exactly are you doing?" She heard him say. His voice showed no sign of the anger she felt from him. She kept her eyes on the mad man known now to her as Hux, he was still breathing hard, he had straightened his posture and his face still full of hate.

"Ren, this woman is a danger to the First Order, she is a sympathizer and must be destroyed along with all the other rebels and traitors you have on this ship. You are a fool to think that she will not endanger all of us." He said, starting to regain his composure.

"I see." He said, his voice still monotone. She felt the pressure release from her arm and he disengaged his light saber. "On whose authority do you attempt to assassinate my apprentice?"

She noticed that his voice did have some inflection with the question. She wasn't sure but she thought he might be toying with the crazed man, if so Kylo was just as mad.

"I am the General here Ren, it's on my authority, this is my ship. You will not intimidate me!" Hux said, all of his pretentiousness back in full.

Ren walked towards Hux leaving her at the door, she could leave if she wanted, but she didn't. She wanted to see how this played out. Kylo was blocking her view from Hux but she heard choking, she knew what he was doing to the man who tried to kill her, that would have killed her if Kylo hadn't arrived. In the back of her mind she thought that he deserved it, but who would she be if she allowed it, or at least if she didn't try to stop it.

 **Kylo Ren**

He felt her fear, she was terrified of something, someone, his pace quickened down the corridor. He normally only felt fear from her when he was around. He engaged his light saber and opened the door, not knowing what he would find, ready for anything.

When he saw her in his quarters she looked like a terrified, her head shot up and he saw her run towards the door, he thought she was running to him, but soon realized she was trying to escape the room, he grabbed her arm still not fully aware of what was happening. They had both heard the clank of the blaster knocking on the side of the wall and he saw Hux gripping the door opening with his free hand. He was breathing hard, Kylo sneered behind his mask, she was running from the General. Seeing the blaster and knowing that he had come to dispose of Rey infuriated him though he did well on not lashing out at the foolish man.

"General Hux, what exactly are you doing?"

"Ren, this woman is a danger to the First Order, she is a sympathizer and must be destroyed along with all the other rebels and traitors you have on this ship. You are a fool to think that she will not endanger all of us."

Kylo knew that Hux was threatened by him, he was no fan of anyone that could manipulate the force, he didn't understand it. This man had no empathy, his thoughts of his own self-worth was on a grandeur scale, one that needed to be cut at the knees.

"I see." He didn't want to kill this man with a saber, with that thought he extinguished it, he wanted to feel Hux's life drain slowly out of his body, this man was an empty shell as it was in Kylo's mind. Where Kylo may be a user of the dark side, and had killed many people he didn't like it as where Hux could destroy an entire system and not even blink and eye. "On whose authority do you attempt to assassinate my apprentice?"

"I am the General here Ren, it's on my authority, this is my ship. You will not intimidate me!"

Ren smiled under his mask, he could see the false visage and he was amused. He thought this his ship? He thought that He and The Master of the Knights of Ren were equals? Generals were a plentiful lot, and there were many that far exceeded Hux. He would take pleasure in killing this man that too often was a source of ire due to his lack of empathy and wealth of conceit.

He stepped away from Rey towards the General, watched as Hux's eyes darted about the room, he must have known well enough what was going to happen. Holding out his hand he watched as the general tried to breath, he was clawing at his throat trying to get the phantom fingers from it. His eyes wide with fear, weak sounds coming from his mouth as he tried to gasp for air.

"That is where you are mistaken General, do I need to remind you the chain of command in all of the First Order?" Kylo growled, "Though I'm sure a dead man needs to know no such thing does he?"

Kylo's rage was taking over, he wanted to watch Hux suffer, this man who had killed so many innocent beings, planets of them. This coward who would pull the trigger on Starbase Killer yet never be in an actual battle, the coward who tried to kill Rey!

He felt her hands on his arm trying to pull it down. "Please don't Kylo!" She begged. He looked down at her, her face full of fear, and desperation. Everything He and the General was, she was the complete opposite.

He dropped the attack on Hux, watching him fall to his hands and knees gulping large breaths of air, veins on his face and neck bulged, and the corners of his eyes were red from the fragile blood vessels that had popped. He walked over and knelt by Hux. "Remember the chain of command General. You've never been my equal, and you will never be. If you decide one day that you wish to disobey any other orders of mine you will be branded as a traitor of the First Order and treated as such."

Kylo knew that his last warning would hit home with Hux. He was the true face of evil in the First Order, but he lived for it. He wanted to be great, to be remembered in history. With a threat of being a traitor he would have a name for himself in history as such.

Hux tried to answer but his throat wouldn't let him speak, he glared at Kylo Ren and produced a short one nod answer. Kylo Ren stood up watching as the humiliated General stood to leave. His blue eyes even bluer since the whites were red and pink.

He watched as the General left, turning his hate filled stare at Rey as he passed her. Kylo was proud of her, she didn't waiver at the glare, she stood there, no fear on her face, no hate, she looked like a diplomat, one that his mother would be proud of. Though he wasn't happy how it played out, he had been looking for an excuse for years to rid himself of the irritation named Armitage Hux.

Once the General left Kylo took off his helmet and dropped it to the floor, he could feel the pain from her head. He grabbed her chin and tilted her face so he could see what damage had been done. She had a small gash just above her ear. The bastard had shot her! Anger flared up again tenfold at the damage. She wasn't bleeding since the blaster cauterized the wound, her hair was burnt around the graze. He wanted to make sure that was all, he grabbed her shoulders and examined the rest of her, she seemed okay, he didn't see any other injuries.

"Kylo, I'm fine." She said with a tired breath. He released her shoulders and wrapped his arms around her pulling her to his chest.

He had been afraid, the kind of fear he hadn't felt in so long. He hated the thought of losing her and as much as he was unsure of what the future was to bring, it was much better with her being in it.

 **Rey**

She stood there letting him examine her, all the adrenaline that had been flowing through her had gone now and she was more in shock than anything.

"Kylo, I'm fine." She was tired, and couldn't believe that just moments ago she was fighting for her life. A man she didn't even know wanted her dead.

His hand released her shoulders and she felt him wrap his arms around her pulling her to his chest. The simple gesture to comfort along with the thought of almost dying brought tears to her eyes. She didn't pull away, she welcomed his embrace, and the tingle that accompanied it, placing her cheek on his chest and wrapping her arms around him. This man who once terrified her, now protected her, would kill for her, and also would stop if she asked him to.

"Rey? What happened?" He had asked her, loosening his hold on her. She looked up at his face, his rich brown eyes full of questions, his raven black hair falling over his forehead as he looked down at her. She didn't want to talk about it, she just wanted to forget the general and his hateful accusations towards her. She wondered though how many of the accusations were true.

He had called her a rebel sympathizer, she couldn't deny that she did sympathize with them, but she also sympathized with those with the First Order. She had seen both sides of this war and her heart went out to both. Well maybe not General Hux, but most the others she did. He called her a pet, then Kylo's whore. Was she either? Both? She remembered the ship when her body practically screamed for his touch and how wonderful it felt like explosions when he made her body reach that peak that it seemed to want.

She couldn't help it, she blanched. Was she just Kylo's pet? Or worse whore? Someone that he would tire of and drop off at the closest planet, habitable or not? If that were the case she would rather go now.

"Am I just your pet? Something that you are going to tire of and discard?" She asked him, she felt the raw emotions coming from him, but not what she usually felt. She felt his pain, confusion, sadness, worry, and… love?

"No, you aren't my pet, you aren't even my apprentice, you are so much more Rey. Believe me when I tell you this." She heard the desperation in his voice.

"Your whore then?" she asked meekly, she was afraid to hear the answer.

"Whore?" He said loudly, almost a shout. "Is that was that pompous bastard told you?"

She could feel the anger she was so used to feeling from him return. She just wanted answers. "Well?"

He held her chin up and looked in her eyes, eyes she could get lost in, her stomach flipping again. "No Rey. You are far from a whore, mine or anyone else's."

He started to laugh, she didn't understand what was so funny, nothing that transpired had been funny. "What?" She said shaking her head out of his hand, feeling the pain in her temple even more when doing so. She wondered if he was laughing at her and she didn't like it.

"Nothing Rey, I've just never known a virgin to be a whore." He said smiling at her.

She couldn't help it, she could feel her face flaming, she smiled at the thought as well.

"Let's get you to the medbay and get you patched up. I'll tell you where we are going tomorrow on the way." He said as he picked up his helmet.


	33. Chapter 33

**Rey**

She woke up excited for the day. In two days she would see two different worlds. Kylo had told her that she would be traveling to Coruscant, that if she were going to be a diplomat for the First Order she would have to look the part. That part had terrified her, she had never had to worry about any of this before in her life. She had asked how she would pay for everything in which she was told all she had to do was remember the number 804863211 and with that she could buy most anything.

She showered and dressed, she felt the tender spot where she had been shot yesterday and inspected it in the mirror. The droids in the bay did a very clean job in sealing the cut so scaring would be minimal. She thought about Kylo and the scar that crossed his face, she never really even noticed it anymore even though it was blatantly obvious, red and jagged. She wondered why he hadn't gone to the droids for it, surely they could have done something to minimize the scar. Though when she did notice it she actually liked it, it had humanized him.

She slipped on her shoes and peeked her head through the open door to Kylo's room, she saw him sitting at his desk looking at a crystal box in his hand he was studying it intently turning it from side to side. She thought it was beautiful craftsmanship, thought she didn't even know what it was.

She stepped through the door clearing her throat softly so he was aware of her presence. He looked up at her and smiled, the one that made him look boyish, the one that made her stomach flip. "What's that?" she asked.

"It's a holocron, the Jedi and sith used them to hold valuable lessons and wisdom."

"How does it work?" She asked, curious about the little box, the closer she got she could see the inner workings, it looked like a complex puzzle box. "It looks like a child's puzzle game."

He smiled and held it out for her to take. "It is of sorts."

It was surprisingly light, she held it close to her face looking at the cogs and pins inside it. She wondered how to open it, she examined the casing and found no openings, and the box was sealed up tight.

"Only a force user can manipulate the inner workings." He told her.

She looked at the box again from all directions and closed her eyes. She could see the complex puzzle in her mind, it was how she built her speeder on Jakku she could see it all in her mind before it was made. She felt the force swirling around her moving the cog in the middle of the box, she could hear it clicking, she opened her eyes still moving the cog listening, click, click, click, ping, click, click. She realized she needed to stop on the cog that sounded different, she kept moving it until she heard the ping. She did the same to the other 4 cogs, listening for a ping instead of a click. Finally the last one, a hologram appeared before her, she jumped and almost dropped the holocron, she wasn't expecting that.

"You did it Rey!" He sounded just as excited as she felt.

She placed the box on his desk, it was a map, of what she didn't know, but apparently Kylo did. He turned the box looking at the inner workings of the building. She watched him as he studied the building, the different chambers. She noticed that it was built on top of a large pointy rock, she wondered what it was.

 **Kylo Ren**

He had been stunned when she opened the holocron exposing it's secrets, he had tried off and on since he recovered it a week ago with no luck. He examined the old Jedi Temple hoping that he could find what he was looking for. He wanted to find information about Rey, who her family was and knew that Luke must have known something. He had always kept information of the younglings and padawan from the academy. He had remembered that Luke would store it in the vaults of the Jedi Temple, no one went there anymore, there were no guards and only someone that was force sensitive could even enter. He had planned to send Phasma and Rey on their way while he tried to learn the truth.

He looked up and saw she was curious, though he had no plans to tell her. He didn't want to bring her any disappointment, especially since it was one topic that she held so dear. He clicked a cog and the hologram disappeared. He knew they should get going to the ship, that Phasma was never late, even when doing something she didn't want to do.

 **Rey**

They went to the hanger and Rey had seen the most beautiful ship she had ever laid eyes on. The entire ship was chrome, it had no hard lines in the entire ship, it looked like it was melded from perfection. "Is this what we are going in?" She asked hardly believing a ship like this existed.

"Sir, everything is prepared for our departure." Phasma said coming down the ramp.

Rey looked at the captain and noticed her uniform was the same as the ship, was it hers? Also what did she mean our departure? She looked at Kylo quizzically.

"Captain Phasma is going to be your guide Rey, and your body guard. For reasons I cannot go out into such a public place." He said taking her hand.

She snatched her hand from his, what if this woman wanted her dead just like Hux does? What irony would that be? Your bodyguard is your own undoing.

"I trust her, this is her home planet. She knows where it is safe for you to be and where it isn't."

She could hear his tone through the mask trying to calm her fears, thought it wasn't working. "Good, so she knows the best places to hide the body." She said sulking.

"Rey…" She could hear the warning in his voice.

"Couldn't you just take off your mask? Then nobody would know who you are." She said, the idea just popping into her head and getting excited about it. She didn't feel safe around anyone but him, he had already saved her life more than she could count on one hand.

"Nice try, but even age or a scar hasn't changed my face much since I was a teenager, and as unpopular as I was, I was still known."

She frowned, he had a reason for everything. Damn him and his logical thinking.

"How about this Rey, I need a co-pilot."

Her face lit up, she was going to help fly the most beautiful craft she had ever seen. Unkar Plutt would be drooling just to touch this craft. She looked at the ship and saw Phasma standing at attention waiting for the two to board. "She won't get upset at me co-piloting her craft?"

She heard a small laugh from behind the mask, "No sweetheart, this is my ship."

Rey could feel the sudden change in him, it was like an emotional door slammed shut on her. She watched as he turned and went to the ship. She had to sprint to catch up with him and his long legs. He always kept her confused, shutting her out at the oddest of moments.

 **Kylo Ren**

Sweetheart. That was all it took and the memories flooded him. Kylo had sounded just like him, the same pride for a ship, calling her sweetheart just as Han called his mother. He couldn't let Rey feel the grief that rushed him thinking of Han. He needed to push it away, away from his mind. He could hear her running behind him to catch up.

He found himself at the cockpit with her following. He took off his helmet and set it on the floor beside him. When he first found this craft on Polis Massa it was almost nothing but the shell, most everything had been gutted from scavengers. He had it sent to The Theed Palace Space Vessel Engineering Corps to be completely brought back to its former glory. This ship was a part of history, his families history, and his heritage.

They first refused stating that it was for Naboo Royalty only but through persuasion and a lot of credits he was able to get them to restore it.

He looked at Rey, she was still looking at the cock pit in awe. He knew she had seen the same beauty in the craftsmanship as he did. "Rey?"

She jumped at the sound of his voice and he grinned. "Are you ready?"

The ship lifted like it was a feather, him guiding the craft out of the hanger with expert precision. Once out into open space he set the coordinates and went into light speed. There was really nothing to do at this point, and he felt a twinge of guilt since he really didn't need a co-pilot but he noticed that she didn't seem to mind. She was taking in the beauty of the controls.

"Where did you get this Kylo? I mean, I've never seen anything like it." She asked him her fingers skimming the controls.

"It was Pademe's before she died."

He noticed her looking at him, scrutinizing him actually, and he raised his eye brow towards her.

"So, let me get this whole family lineage straight."

He frowned, he knew she could since his displeasure the way the conversation had even started.

"Wait, hear me out." She said. "So, your grandmother was a queen, of Naboo right?" He just nodded trying to appease her. "Okay, and your grandfather was a Jedi master who apparently was the one, as stated in Anakin's journal. But he turned into Darth Vader, a sith lord that mothers would tell their children about to get them to behave right."

He wasn't amused at her interpretation of his grandfather at all. He spun his chair to face her crossing his arms in annoyance hoping she could see it in his face and body language. She apparently didn't since she kept on or didn't care.

"So, your grandmother has two children,"

"Twins" He interrupted, if she was going to conclude things she might as well get it right.

"Okay, so she has twins, a boy and a girl. The boy becomes a Jedi Master, and the girl, your mother, becomes a princess?"

"And? What point are you trying to make Rey?" He asked, already tired of hearing of his past and completely screwed up family.

"So you are what? A prince? A king?"

He laughed, he couldn't help it. He looked at her scowl and stopped laughing, but he couldn't wipe the smile on his face. She was serious. "No I'm no prince, and I'm no king. My grandmother, thought was a queen, was an elected queen, she only held the position for a short time. As for Princess Leia, she was the princess of Alderaan, which now no longer exists. I guess if it did, then I would be a prince."

He hadn't ever really thought of it, how different his life would have been, or would it? It didn't matter, what mattered was where they were now. There was nothing that could bring any of it back, Alderaan, his family. He needed to focus on the here and now.

His thoughts were disturbed when the cock pit door opened and a woman in a long silvery dress walked in. He tried to keep a straight face seeing Phasma in a dress of all things. He was sure that she would opt for pants instead.

"Sir, I do own a dress." She told him, her body language still that of a soldier, her face not giving a hint of emotion.

 **Rey**

Rey looked at the woman that walked through the door wondering who she was. She was very pretty, and very tall. Her short blonde hair swept to the side of her face, freckles dotted the pale skin on her nose and cheeks. Her top lip was thin, but her bottom lip was full, that made it look like she was pouting. Rey could see the definition of her tuned muscles through the tight dress she wore.

"Sir, I do own a dress." The woman had said. Rey recognized the voice, it did sound a bit different without the chrome helmet but it was Phasma. She couldn't believe her eyes, this beautiful woman was always behind a mask as well.

Rey looked at Kylo, "Ren, if all your troopers look like this it's a shame you are hiding them behind masks."

"Trust me Ma'am, I have seen them and there are very few that would look good in this dress." Phasma said with a small blush and smaller smile at the compliment.

Rey smiled, she had a sense of humor at least, more than Kylo did at least. She just hoped that she didn't want to kill her.

* * *

I guess this is just a cute little chapter since Rey could have died in the last chapter. I needed to bring some fun in.

I hope everyone has enjoyed it so far, there is still much to do.


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